By now you’ve at least heard about the infamous “tea bagging” incident in the Krystal Hamburger Restaurant on Bourbon Street.

You’ve probably even seen it as a passed out LSU fan is taunted by Alabama fans, even to the point that one fan removes his package from his pants and rubs his manhood on the passed out fan.

This incident is a capsule…a perfect example, if you will…of all that has gone wrong in sports today.

First things first: Let’s be clear. The LSU fan is not an innocent victim here.

He was not removed from his home or hotel room where he was resting peacefully, minding his own business.

Instead, apparently he had chosen to get plastered in public, to the point that he could not maintain consciousness. Public intoxication in every city in America is a crime. However, the lines tend to blur on Bourbon Street, so to speak.

But speaking of Bourbon Street, this is a place internationally known for levels of debauchery once reserved only for cities like Sodom and Gomorrah. To choose that location to drink yourself to the point that you can no longer function, sleeping wherever gravity finally casts you is a level of stupid few will ever experience in life.

Now throw in that this fan was “allegedly” being confrontational with rival fans, taunting them throughout his drunken state. I’m sure none of us have ever encountered a combative, confrontational LSU fan, have we?

And throw in that many most likely all of those he was taunting were inebriated with liquid spirits themselves, and you have yourself a powder keg in a room full of lit matches.

Question #1: Wanna know how I know I’ll never have another man’s junk rubbed on me while I’m unconscious?

I’M NOT GETTING DRUNK IN PUBLIC, PASSING OUT JUST SECONDS AFTER TAUNTING DRUNK MEMBERS OF AN OPPOSING FAN BASE THAT HATE ME BOTH FOR WHAT I’M DOING TO THEM AND WHO I’M FOR. A second grader can get that.

Secondly, what in the world possesses a person to remove their genitals and rub them on someone?

Make no mistake, the activity seen in that video is criminal. Touching someone sexually without their consent is a crime, whether the touching involves your genitalia, their genitalia, or both.

The guy seen in the video is in big trouble. Harvey Updyke kind of trouble. The same type mob that’s ready to see Harvey swing from any tree in Lee County is ready to hang this guy from the nearest moss covered tree in Baton Rouge, and not by his neck.

Had he kept his pants zipped he would have stayed out of trouble. Oh, how many times has that statement been true in life?

Question #2: Wanna know how I know I’m never going to jail for a lewd act like this guy performed on the unconscious LSU fan?

I’M NOT REMOVING MY JUNK FROM MY PANTS IN PUBLIC, RUBBING THEM ALL OVER SOMEONE. Again, not a hard concept.

Third, what’s wrong with football fans?

The temptation from all who hate Alabama (or the SEC for that matter) is to pile on after an incident like this.

But do I really have to remind you that this isn’t an “Alabama fan” issue?

Mal Moore doesn’t send an email out periodically reminding boosters to rub their genitals all over opposing fans. Nick Saban doesn’t preach the importance of tea bagging to the fans when he has the opportunity to address them.

Had I had a video camera rolling the night my 75 year old father was challenged to a fight at a gas station by two Auburn fans in their 30’s for apparently just having an Alabama hat on, that would’ve made neat video for YouTube.

Or the time Tennessee fans flattened three of the tires of a friend’s SUV outside Neyland Stadium.

Or the time LSU fans in Bryant-Denny kept pelting my wife, myself and everyone around us with ice in 2005.

Or the time I watched a dozen LSU men in their 50’s taunt and throw things at the Alabama cheerleaders for an entire game in Baton Rouge in 1998, girls young enough to be any of their daughters.

Or the Georgia fans, who when I was just a high school student, came after me in Athens following a loss.

Folks, the problem isn’t a particular incident. The problem is hate. Whether the source of the hate is the color of your skin, or the colors that you wear, the problem is hate.

Get that fixed and you don’t have incidents like this. Since that’ll never happen, expect more.

But to say “Thar goes them Bama fans” is as ignorant as the incident that took place itself.

Hatred is the problem.

Question #3: How do you fix this?

ACCEPT JESUS CHRIST FOR WHO HE SAID HE WAS AND MAKE HIM LORD OF YOUR LIFE. Your perspectives on things like Alabama football change when you do.

Finally, I’m just surprised to know there’s a Krystal Hamburgers on Bourbon Street. When I first heard about the incident I thought “Crystals” was just another raunchy boob bar on that street.

It makes total sense that it’s there, as an alcohol soaker I guess. But what doesn’t make sense is that on a street known for any and everything, we’re shocked that something like this happened.

Tell me, what again do they do on that street for plastic beads?

Does it make it right? No. But mix alchohol with fanatacism, hatred, and an area known for lewd activity, and you’ve got yourself a picture of everything wrong with fandom in sports.


(Follow me on Twitter for capstonereport.com news, commentary and smack.)

46 thoughts on ““Tea bagging” incident a snapshot of all that’s wrong in sports”

  1. Very well written ITK. We have probably all had our share of loudmouth drunks at games, just never had a testicle terrorist come after me. It makes the state itself look bad. Not just a fanbase.

  2. Good article. We probably all need to chill out a little. I don’t mind rival fanbases, just the ones that D**kheads. 🙂

  3. The CR is right. This fan’s actions is not an Alabama or Alabama fan issue. How Alabama fans react is an issue.

    Kudos to the CR for finally condemning this type stuff after it has been out for several days.

    Now …where is the condemnation of the Alabama fans that are complaining that this is no big deal?

    Don’t ask RC …he will (as typical) lose his mind, let his arrogance get the best of him and start deflecting negativity towards Auburn.

    Seems to me that if this kid doesn’t give him self up, then a boycott of the Mobile TV station that employs the kid’s dad should be arranged. The CR sure has supported boycotting the Bham News over such unimportant issues as football fandom ….this is much more important.

    I wait to see how you handle it.

    1. Hoopie, how much power do you think the CR has?

      How about we let the person who did the crime deal with it, instead of trying to punish everyone that had nothing to do with it ?

      Speaking of Boycotts…how is the Finebaum boycott going 🙂

      1. If you aren’t hypocrites, then you would use the same tactics for this issue as you would those issues that really make you mad.

        I never boycotted Finebaum. I lightly listen every now and then just to see what the idiots are saying. There is so much redundancy on that show it doesn’t take much listening to see what he is spinning and how the idiots are reacting.

    2. Hoopie,
      The guy did turn himself in, and I am sure he will have criminal charges on him. What he did was a crime, for sure. You are trying to turn this into something else, because your feelings get hurt with all of our pointing and laughing at Auburn. But yet, you feel the need to be here amongst it all.

      But it is one stupid guy, who got carried away, and now he will pay the price. We don’t owe it to you or anyone to have much concern over this as an Alabama fan. It doesn’t reflect on all of us, but I am sure that when there isn’t much going on with Bama that is bad enough for you Barners to find hope in, your fanbase will milk this and get as much mileage out of it as you can. And that is okay.

      I personally think that the 4 armed robbers from Auburn was a more heinous crime. There were Auburn fans who didn’t think it was such a big deal since Chizik kicked them off the team.There wasn’t a whole lot of outrage from the Auburn fanbase on that either, even though that incident was an indictment of the Auburn program more so than the ‘teabagging’ incident is against Bama.

      1. Dude …if you aren’t a hypocrite, then you would go on and on about this proven crime, just like you have done based on for other teams. In fact, the CR goes on and on based on only rumors, so with this video proof and now the guy turning himself in, there is no question of guilt.

        I would hope to see 40 or 50 posts condemning this ..just like you do when it is another team.

        I’m gonna keep coming around and point out your hypocrisy and bias …year ….after year …after year.

        The type of ignorant bias exhibit by the major members of this blog are the exact thing that the rest of the country laughs about.

        1. Hoopie, Auburn sucks, and will for a quite a while.

          If that makes you butt-hurt, looking for other topics to shoulder your burden, so sorry.

          Auburn’s suckiness is a burden you must bear alone.

        2. Exactly Hoopie. Like I said, milk it and get all the mileage you want. Sure, we laugh and point at Auburn. We go on and on about it. You come here and complain and whine about it. That is partially the point. Plus the fact that most of us Bama fans, really, really don’t like Auburn fans like yourself. This is a place for Bama fans to discuss things. Auburn is the rival school. You act like this place is supposed to be unbiased and should be praising all things Auburn. Sorry, but I doubt you will ever see that here. You should hang out at the Auburn web sites if this place gets your panties wadded up so much.

  4. Lmao I’ve got a video on my phone right now of two trailer trash awbs beating and kicking a bama fan out side of sky bar for hollering roll tide!! Alabama just won their 14th national title….18th if you go by the ncaa fbs record book…..and no amount of tea bagging or tree poisoning incidents are gonna change that!!!! ROLL TIDE BITCHES!!!

  5. Thanks for the commentary, Andy Rooney.

    You coming back to this site will not bother anybody. Most people enjoy abusing you..year after year after year.

    Roll Tide !!! 14!!!

  6. is that the same “rest of the country” that knows auburn bought and paid for cam newton therefore designating 2010 as 2010*?

  7. Seems like a lot of guys who have

    “ACCEPT[ED] JESUS CHRIST FOR WHO HE SAID HE WAS AND MAKE HIM LORD OF YOUR LIFE.”

    would LOVE to do exactly what this guy did.

    Never trust a Jesus freak!

  8. Hoopie,

    I love kicking your sorry, hypocritical ass on this forum. You are a fukin racist. Please go on and tell us how your wife makes quilts for us poor black folk

  9. TO ALL AUBURN HYPOCRITES INCLUDING HOOPIE:

    The way you hate Alabama shows the hate you have in your heart for people of different colors and cultures. FBJ and Hoopie need to start wearing bedsheets in public. Get your hearts right

    We will keep reporting and investigating Auburn University until they turn the corner and clean up their own back yard

    1. You just keep on investigating there Columbo. Lmao, I had almost forgotten what a complete waste of sperm you really are. Bedsheets in public huh? You actually question where my heart is, you rape threatening butthole surfer? Dude, it was fun for awhile, but you are really starting to bore the hell out of me. Why don’t you run along and find you some twinks your own age, and leave the football talk and such to grown men.

  10. The teabagger and harvey both need to be
    put in the same jail cell and throw away the
    key. Both Bama and the Barn have crazy
    fans like these 2 idiots. RTR

    1. Don- I have to say you are right. This guy from… what Smiths Station? And Harvey both need to get it all thrown @ them. How dumb can one get? What were they thinking? And I am not just talking about the guy that just turned himself in but the LSU fan that was drunk in public and the onlookers. What a darn mess. RTR

  11. I have noticed that a large number of aub fans around my age have a very deep seated hate for the Tide. These are people I have know all my life and back in the olden days they didn’t seem to hate us so much. College for my class graduated in 78. While driving today and wondering how this got to this level and had a thought. During my age groups formative years lets say 1960-1980 auburn beat Bama four times. If I was on the other side of the fence I would have a deep seated hate as well. I believe back then they hated us just as much it was just bad manners to visibly display the fact. As far as all the other schools the Internet and finebaum are at the root of that behavior. I to hate auburn now but I didn’t back then. And I must confess when it looked like Oregon was going to beat them last year my joy quickly turned sad. All I could think about was my brother and brother in law that were about to be heartbroken, and who knows how long it would take them to get back and have another chance. Once they won I was indifferent. I mean we had 13 at the time, it’s not like they will ever catch us in that department. I don’t think they paid cam but I do think they knew he had been shopped and should not be playing for any team. They rolled the dice and hit won and came through clean, so far. Now we have made a sandwich out of their NC so they are going to be pissed for a while.
    Just saying’

  12. Joebama:

    I agree 100%. I hate Auburn because they are a bunch of low life self-righteous white trash hypocrites. A large majority, hell, MOST of their fanbase TALK Christianity and love, then turn around and post HATE about their fellow man, similar to old school KKK back in the Old South. Just look at posts from Hoopie and FBJ Lives. Plane trash

  13. If this guy can get 25 years for embarrassing a helpless LSU fan, shouldn’t the Alabama defense be shot at sunrise for humiliating a helpless LSU offense?

    1. George Jefferson are you just another dumb self-righteous bama fan? He didn’t embarras a LSU fan, he imbarrased himself, his parents, and his family! The fact that you can’t see that and can make jokes about what he did proves you are just as morally bankrupt as he is. Alabama does not need fans like him, Harvey Updyke or you representing our University!

      And in case you forgot LSU’s defense humiliated our offense on November 5th in our own stadium.

  14. Very funny, but he made a bad decision. He has already been fired from his job. He has already paid a big enough price. There is no reason to continue to ruin his life. The PC liberal police make me sick! Hit him w a fine and end it!!!!!

    1. I can believe it came from a LSU or Auburn fan. Sad thing, apparently they all have degrees from their respective Universities….at least that is what they tell me.

      1. Good one, Flash! That was awesome!! You are the man!

        Did you piss yourself from laughing so hard at your own joke?!

  15. Y’all don’t pay flash any attention he still hasn’t got his mind wrapped around the fact his team won the SEC and still isn’t the best team in the SEC….poor little tink tink…..

  16. Funny story, but true. Yesterday I was going to lunch from work. I went out to the parking lot to get in my vehicle, and lo and behold, of all places, in an alley behind a bail bonds business next door to where I work, there was Les Miles. He was with two other LSU coaches talking to a man and a woman. I assume he was talking to the parents of a highly rated LB recruit from a high school close by, but the more I think about it, maybe he was just looking for a group rate deal from the bail bond place.

    He was posing and taking pictures with the guys that worked at the place, and they were all wearing Bama stuff.

  17. FBJ Lives,

    “Butthole Surfer?” How clever and mature. Funny, how you conveniently forget you started the hate btwn me and you, and I have offered several times to put an end to it in a public setting. Each time you CS out with some excuse and want me to visit your facebook page instead like some teenage girl?? You are the one who needs to man up BADLY. The first step is to take responsibility for your football program’s lack of ethics and integrity

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