ITKSo you think your team has arrived. How cute.

So your team finished an improbable season in 2013, sneaking up on everyone they played in an anomoly of a year. That is awesome.

Now do it again.

Do it when everyone has their game with your team circled on their schedule. Do it when, for other programs, beating your team defines their season, regardless of the results in other games.

Oregon-wants-Bama

String together another season where it takes every team you play being at their best and you at your worst in order for them to beat you.

Heck, string together two back-to-back 10-win+ seasons before you claim you’ve arrived (sorry Auburn, ’88 & ’89…your only stint…was an eternity ago). Do it 14 times and get back with me.

Tulsa-wants-Bama

Let me know when your team crosses the threshold of a 90% or higher winning percentage over five seasons.

Let me know when defeating your program becomes the benchmark of success. When your logo or name ignites an opposing fanbase because they want to believe their team is nearing the success that yours is known for.

Kansas-wants-Bama

When you darken the door of a thing called “sustained success,” and don’t just talk about sustained success, send me a telegram.

When coaches of other programs spend more time watching your team’s game film than film from any other opponent…get back with me.

Ball-State-wants-Bama

When you dip your preverbial toe in the pool of success more than once, before being thrust back into the shadows by the pains of reality, pop me an email.

When your coach can tell your fanbase “Nick Saban’s run is over” by longterm, on-the-field success, NOT just by a boast to koolaid drinking boners at a booster event, I’ll sit up and listen.

Florida-wants-Bama

Holla when 11-2 and 10-3 are bad years for your school.

Let me know when “Beat (your school’s name here)” becomes the definition of success for programs…pick one, any one…across the country.

NIU-wants-Bama

Let me know when you have more rivals than you’re even aware of because EVERYBODY looks as you as their rival, mainly because your team has kicked their asses so many times it has invoked a hatred in them for your school that’s difficult, if not impossible, to define.

Let me know when your program steps into the double-digit category for National Championships. Or even the conference variety.

Random-youth-team-wants-Bama

Let me know when your team wins it all three times out of the last five tries. Not one every fifty years, or just getting “to” the big game.

Let me know when your program brings home the hardware and doesn’t have to slump off the field amid somebody else’s confetti.

Heck, let me know when geographically the majority of fans even know where your school is.

LSU-wants-Bama

Let me know when rival fans of your school run their mouths incessantly in the offseason because they know in their hearts…with very little convincing…that their team can’t replicate what they witnessed the previous season…because fantasies, EA Sports simulations and DVR replays are all they’ll soon have.

Inform me kindly when your program blows your biggest rival out of the stadium by scores like 36-0, 42-14 or 49-0…in lieu of nail biters where the planets have to align just right in your favor. I mean, do this just once…on occasion.

Let me know when your program doesn’t have a coach who has only worn the big boy pants for two seasons.

Let me know when the coach you want so much to believe is the real deal owns not one, not two, not three, but FOUR national titles.

And let me know when your team sells out your stupid stadium when OUR team isn’t also playing there that day.

WV-wants-Bama

The fact is, Alabama is “Alabama” for a reason, and your team is not. Despite any recent, short-term success, facts are facts.

Alabama still owns college football. And Alabama, despite any recent luck, still owns your teams’ football program.

No matter how hard it is to swallow, let me know when what I’ve just force fed you isn’t true.

Thought so. Roll Tide!


(Follow ITK on Twitter for Bama news, commentary and smack.)

157 Responses to ““We Want Bama” still defines college football” Subscribe

  1. crimson hammah June 20, 2014 at 2:18 pm #

    CORRECT THE BARN IS A PRODUCT OF HYPE TO GET SOMEBODY ANYBODY TO KNOCK OFF THE KING OF THE MOUNTAIN SIMILAR TO THE GREAT WHITE HOPE FOR BOXING IN THE 70S

    • peachy June 21, 2014 at 4:58 pm #

      We knocked the King of the mountain last year. And until you guys climb back up its us looking down on you. maybe Saban can even up his record with Malzahn this year. And maybe Malzahn will be 2-0 with the game at Jordan Hare next year.

      To be such a “king” Saban is only 4-3 v/s Auburn in his time at Alabama and those 4 wins came against two 8 win teams, a 5 win team and a 3 win team. Maybe one day he’ll be able to beat a good Auburn team.

      • The Conduit June 21, 2014 at 7:17 pm #

        A “good” Auburn team, hilarious! Good one, peachy. Well played.

        • Please stop touching your cousins June 23, 2014 at 11:55 am #

          Shoot, thenn I’d hate you lose to a bad one

      • ITK June 21, 2014 at 7:26 pm #

        If that’s so, peachy, tell me. Why doesn’t anyone take Auburn seriously heading into this season?

        Maybe because you’ve got one back-to-back 10+ win season in your program’s entire history? And everyone had eyes to see the utter and sheer luck that was required to get your team of thugs (who you never intend to graduate) into the big game?

        Yep. And for the record, Saban has lost to the three different Auburn coaches who’ve been there while he’s been at Bama. But he’s never lost to ANY of them twice. Instead, they get processed. Gone is Tubbs. Gone is Chiznik. Next is your high school nerd.

        Gustav Malzahn is NOTHING. N-o-t-h-i-n-g. Now come up with some more stats that don’t mean crap.

        The only stat that matters is “sustained success”, and if Gustav and his nerdy sweater vests can’t get the likes of Rashaan Evans to come there FROM RIGHT THERE IN AUBURN, his processing will come sooner than you hope. Of course, if he gets arrested and kicked off the team you may have a chance at him. It’s how one becomes a REAL Auburn man. LOL

        • Alabama1941 June 23, 2014 at 6:20 pm #

          I would bet my life that Auburn has a winning record against Alabama in this turds life.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 7:01 pm #

            Dang I wish you were serious about that bet. I was born well before 1982, or to the Aubie, “the year time began.” So you’d lose.

          • nope June 24, 2014 at 6:32 am #

            @Alabama1941

            I just love it when Barners use “Alabama” in their user name. It’s so Little Brother Syndrome.

            What was 1941 like, anyway? Because I remember 1993.

      • Crimsonite June 21, 2014 at 11:14 pm #

        You’re such a dumbass bitch that it’s really a waste of my damn yime answering you. You stupud, pathetic sons of bitches must have the most miserable life immaginable living in Bsma’s shadow. You win by greatest accident one fuking marquee game in three years, and suddenly you’re Gods gift to the universe and Bama is a warm, deadpile of shit on a toadstool. Do you know just how fuking retarded, and fuking wrong that is? You stupid bastards belong in a different universe, a different dimension the way you imagine and fantasize and put all your hopes for the future on one fuking game in 3 years. You actually think thst accident was something special? You think it means the fuking universe has turned upsidedown on its axis? One fucking game? Hey dumbasses, Texas A&M did the same damn thing two years ago. Where did it get them? You poor pathetic bastards should be labotomized. You’d feel a hell of a lot better, and the world would be a better place too. LMMFAO at you!

  2. Crimsonite June 20, 2014 at 8:20 pm #

    Nice article. 100% unadulterated truth, no matter how any rival assholes try to spin it. Now just sit back and wait for the shit storm – in 1 – 2 – 3 —-

    • Denny Chimes June 21, 2014 at 7:35 am #

      Yeah, it’s coming alright. (gets popcorn)

  3. Denny Chimes June 21, 2014 at 7:34 am #

    I’m sure it will sound arrogant and insulting to some, but the TRUTH is the TRUTH.

  4. peachy June 21, 2014 at 4:55 pm #

    To say Auburn snuck up on everyone last year is asinine. Are you saying Saban was so stupid last year that he didn’t prepare for Auburn because he didn’t think they were any good? That the fact they were ranked in the top 5 at the time means they snuck up on Alabama?

    The excuses from you guys are truly epic this time. Remember “Never again”? Apparently Malzahn didn’t give a shit about your little Auburn slogan .

    • The Conduit June 21, 2014 at 7:15 pm #

      Asinine?

      Auburn won zero conference games the year before. They started a QB who wasn’t even there for spring practice.

      Then Alabama missed 4 field goals instead of taking a knee or being “unprepared.”

      You’re a “cult” classic, peachy. Please never change.

      • ITK June 21, 2014 at 7:20 pm #

        Peachy reminds me of that kid I knew in elementary school who got his ass kicked every day at recess but kept coming back for more because it was the only attention he could get.

      • Will June 23, 2014 at 9:21 am #

        If Auburn was so bad why did bama have to settle for field goal attempts? Shouldn’t almighty Alabama been able to score at will? Kinda hard to sneak up on a team when it’s the last game of the regular season. I guess you forgot the iron bowl was for the SEC west championship too. Gus and Auburn seem to have setup camp inside your head.

        • nope June 23, 2014 at 9:55 am #

          Be careful what you wish for.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 10:45 am #

            I figured you wouldn’t have a good answer as to why if Alabama was so dominant were they settling for field goal attempts against the pourous defense of Auburn? They couldn’t even get one yard to put the game away.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 10:45 am #

          Yep. We’re terrified of your coach who’s been a college head coach for just two seasons.

          Our 4-TIME National Champion head coach will never figure him out.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 10:53 am #

            Śhow me where I said terrified. I’ll wait. I said they have setup camp inside your head which they obviously have. The next time Saban and his lap dog Smart figure out to stop a spread will be the first time.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 11:11 am #

            Considering Saban and co. are 71-9 over the last six seasons…or 36-6 over the last three, I’d say they’ve figured out how to stop just about everybody. No one beats them twice in a row.

            But as Steve Perry sang, “Don’t Stop Believin'”. Not that any of us thought you as a delusional barner ever would.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 10:55 am #

            You also never answered or just seem to be ignoring that almighty Alabama couldn’t get one yard to put the game away, and couldn’t score touchdowns against Auburn’s D that was serviceable but nothing great.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 11:15 am #

            You’re right in that Bama was tight in that game, and that the offensive coordinator who failed to give the ball to Derrick Henry or Kenyon Drake ONCE in that game was the problem.

            I don’t know if you get outside much, but said coordinator is now gone, replaced by a true offensive genius (check his resume as a coordinator and developer of QB’s, not a head coach). But I’m sure you’ll retort with something about your sweater vest socially retarded nerd.

            I’ll wait.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 12:08 pm #

            Again with excuses. Being tight and blaming Nussmier is funny. Saban controls everything. Why didn’t he tell him to play Henry or Drake earlier? Did he not know they were better than Yeldon? Alabama didn’t make the plays they needed to make. Auburn did. Plain as simple. That’s not Nussmier’s fault they couldn’t get one yard. Sometimes you just have to step up and make a play. Alabama had their chance and they didn’t capitalize.That’s it. You can try to make any excuse you want to to make yourself feel better. You’re obviously still pretty bothered by Alabama shitting the bed that game. I probably would be to if Auburn had gotten out coached as bad as Bama that night. To say the return field was luck is just you not knowing what you’re talking about. Bama had plenty of chances to tackle him and they didn’t. Saban could have tried to go to OT but he didn’t because he probably knew they’d lose in OT too.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:08 pm #

            Why can’t Auburn win the National Championship though? And how old will it make you in 50 years when then get another one? By the looks of your writing you’re in your early 20’s, so that’d make you, what, 72? 73? When it happens again, I mean.

            OH I FORGOT! Y’all beat Bama, and that’s all that matters! My bad. Sorry to bother you with itty bitty details like sustained success and national superiority. Except for cases where you make up titles out of thin air, those kinds of details don’t bother you, eh?

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 12:09 pm #

            Oh I forgot. Saban was out coached by a high school coach in a sweater vest.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:18 pm #

            Let me know when that nerd wins something more than an occasional rivalry game.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:41 pm #

            You said yourself he’s only been a head coach two years. Pretty sure almighty Saban wasn’t playing in a national championship game in his second year as a head coach. He’ll have more chances. It is hilarious to me that Auburn and Gus are in your head so bad you wrote a terrible “story” about it whining. Is calling Malzahn a nerd supposed to bother anyone? He’s got you so riled up he’s all you think about. Prayers sent. I hope you feel better about yourself trying to take digs at someone that passed away. Once again proving Alabama is by far the worst fan base in America. Real classy, but I wouldn’t expect anything else from a typical bama fan.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:44 pm #

            I wasn’t taking a dig at someone who’s passed away. Sorry reading comprehension is a challenge for you.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 2:07 pm #

            Sure you weren’t. You got mad people aren’t telling you great story and calling it out for how dumb it is and you tried to make it personal. Which I expect from someone whose point is getting picked apart as bad as yours have been on here. Next time try writing something decent and maybe the outcome will be more of what you expected.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:09 pm #

            Will there are barner idiots, and then there is you. You honestly have no idea about anything you’re talking about.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 2:27 pm #

            Oh no. You just called me an idiot. How will I ever go on? You continue to make my point that you’re angry and have to make it personal because you know what you wrote was trash. Keep writing though. You may write something worth reading one day instead if starting every paragraph with the same exact sentence. It’s repetitive and boring not to mention what you were writing was garbage.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:49 pm #

            You say I’m angry. I say you’re stupid. Those are two completely different ideas.

        • Crimsonite June 24, 2014 at 6:48 am #

          Ok dumbass I’ll answer your retarded assed question. First of all Bams did score 10 more points and the fuking officials toik them off the board with bad calls. So your defense didn’t really stop Bams from beating you. Yes your defense did stop us twice with one yard to go and with two yards to go. But neither would have mattered if not for bogus penalties that took away other points. But more than that, even Samford’s defense could have stopped those two stupid play calls. Not a fan in the stadium would have called those two dumbass plays. The play calling in the IB is exactly whywe have Lane Kiffin. When Saban invited Kiffin to consult after the IB, the OC knew his ass was going to be canned. That’s why he rushed to find a new job. Hell,if I’d called those dumbassed plays in the IB I’d hsve expected to get my ass fired. It wasn’t just the IB either. The play calling all season, except for Texas A&M, was atrocious. Fortunately before tje IB no one could stay close enough to Bama for stupid assed plays to make a difference. When I saw that stupid assed one yard dive play I wanted to go up in the press box and beat the shit out of Nussmeire. But go ahead asshole, continue the standard Barnturd tradition of otherworldly fantasies after winning just ONE marquee game in three years. ROTFLMMFAO!

    • ITK June 21, 2014 at 7:17 pm #

      A team what was 0-8 in conference play the year before did in fact sneak up on everyone that didn’t take them seriously, at least early to mid-season. By seasons’ end the Lucky Charms shipments started rolling in, and voila! You have yourself a season you’ll never see again.

      Sorry. Not sure why logic always evades you, but ‘ereya go.

      Now come back with something about your high school coach (who has been a college head coach just two seasons) being better than our FOUR TIME national champion.

      We’re waiting…

  5. bamabino June 21, 2014 at 8:18 pm #

    LMAO@ 1988-89 being the only time Aubie managed back to back 10+ win seasons. Talk about futile.

    • ITK June 21, 2014 at 8:26 pm #

      Oh but wait, bamabino… We’re to take them seriously. Haven’t you heard?

      • bamabino June 21, 2014 at 9:50 pm #

        How can you? It took them til 1957 just to reach a 10 win season. Ironically that season they became the only team in history to be awarded a NC while bowl ineligible for Saint Shug paying players. Their 2010 team is the only NC team in history to have their starting QB declared ineligible and re-instated by the NCAA in a 24 hour turnaround. They are a national laughingstock. Even when they win, they lose.

  6. RC June 22, 2014 at 8:57 am #

    9 wins is NOT a good team, at least by Alabama football standards. Any program that has a good season every 3-4 years that cannot sustain success is the king of nothing except a steaming pile of cow manure. Auburn Polytech is definitely the king of that.

  7. Bbbrs June 22, 2014 at 4:13 pm #

    Coming from an Ole Miss Rebel, this is the most self-righteously butthurt article I have ever read. “Holla when 11-2 and 10-3 are bad years for your school.” Really? Those aren’t bad years for your school; that just means you have terrible fans. Rather than have pride that your only regular-season loss was to the national runner-up, you just HAD to find some way to spin it to where it’s all about you again. Do you even have a memory of Alabama football before 2008? It’s become very clear that you are more like Harvey Updyke than a respectable Alabama alumnus.

    • RC June 22, 2014 at 5:29 pm #

      You’re a lying turd with the “I’m an Ole Miss fan.” Typical liar. Steaming pile of shit

    • ITK June 22, 2014 at 5:35 pm #

      I do have memory of football before 2008, but DO NOT remember the last time we lost to Ole Miss.

      • nope June 23, 2014 at 2:55 pm #

        It’s funny, I can’t remember 1993 and 2003, and I’m pretty sure I’m already forgetting 2013 so that Auburn can claim that national championship too.

        Oh wait, it’s coming back to me. Auburn didn’t win those titles. Now I remember. What a fool I must look like.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 3:00 pm #

          @nope

          I saw them win it with my own eyes last year. They returned a kick for a touchdown and won it.

          (Says every revisionist Auburn fan to their grandkids one day.)

  8. JJsmt June 22, 2014 at 5:59 pm #

    let’s consider some other numbers…

    Average SAT score
    Auburn 1750
    Alabama 1680

    Average ACT score
    Auburn 26
    Alabama 23

    Typical graduate salary mid career
    Auburn $87,900
    Alabama $70,500

    Pulitzer Prize winners
    Auburn 1
    Alabama 0

    FOX Sports gave bama fans the title of #1 dumbest fan base in America!
    “…Bama fans are incapable of coherent thought and have a deep-seated insecurity about all things in life. Alabama football comprises, and this is not an exaggeration, 99% of their self esteem.”

    • RC June 22, 2014 at 10:00 pm #

      The fact that you have to defend that cow shit University shows you and the other fans have no self pride or esteem about AuBUM. I graduated from UAT and I know a lot of Auburn graduates. Though I admire the Engineering grads, the REST of AU including the Loader School of Business are a bunch of small time, dumb ass, country fucks. All of that research you did means nothing to anybody but Auburn grads. I doubt most of it is accurate since UAT is ranked higher than Auburn in the latest Forbes, Princeton Review, and US World & Report. Get your damn facts straight, Barber!!! Either way,arrogance was not the way to go here, especially when backing fiction, you country bumpkin hypocrite

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 6:42 am #

      I bow to your numbers without verified sources. Thanks friend.

      I honestly LOL’d (and I’m not kidding) that you actually tried to provide data on the “mid-career salaries” of UA and Abarn graduates, meaning 30,000+ people from both institutions providing earnings information every year for at least 5-7 years to qualify as quantitative research.

      Thank you for further proof that fantasy resides in Lee County.

    • Jkm June 23, 2014 at 12:07 pm #

      Hey asshole, Alabama is the better overall academic program. Take a look for yourself. http://colleges.usnews.rankingsandreviews.com/best-colleges/rankings/national-universities/top-public/page+2

      • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:05 pm #

        Oh no you didn’t…presenting undisputable facts to a barner is a sure way to make their heads explode.

        • Jkm June 23, 2014 at 2:28 pm #

          Notice how they haven’t responded to this?

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:55 pm #

            It takes a while to work up phraseology that you can understand.

  9. ricky bobby June 22, 2014 at 8:39 pm #

    Man this is a big shit storm here. University of AL and AU are in the same state therefore either of us doing great in football (like both teams do every year) brings money to the state. Yet you dumb fucks that I have to live around only bitch and complain about ohhhhh my teams better fuck your specific team love this country and the few goddamn educated people living within it that have to deal with ignorant fucks that go for al or au while attending at either college. War Damn Eagle but I respect the fuck out of education and knowledge and once it does come to the iron bowl damn right I want AU to win but I’m not going to tie your dogs collar to the rear bumper of your car to express that. AL is a great team as well with a great coach but fuck a hick that gets irritated over how much pride they have in the “Mighty Tide” such belligerent ass people even AU fans are like that but AL has such a huge fan base its all you here while living in the state of AL also this gigantic fan base ruins a lot of stats because word of mouth between people in person and on the internet always effects polls or what not, its practically cheating with that many idiots to support you. around the bowl and down the hole role tied roll.

    • RC June 22, 2014 at 10:03 pm #

      If you think college football fans of the Gators, Sooners, Irish, or Longhorns don’t worship their teams, alumni or not, you are as dumb as the typical Mayberry-ish Auburn fan, you stupid illiterate cow licker!!!!

  10. TJames June 23, 2014 at 1:18 am #

    Oklahoma meets all of these statistical requirements. Also get back to me when your team is ranked by ESPN as Most Prestigious Post-WW2 Football Program

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 6:48 am #

      Get back to me when Bob Stoops can win the big one, and I don’t mean a meaningless bowl game against a de-gutted football team.

      Have fun in the Outback Bowl this season.

  11. rick-bob McSEC June 23, 2014 at 7:06 am #

    “we lost and don’t know how to do it graciously” still defines Bama. Grow up, college football is cyclical.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 8:34 am #

      You’re right. It’s just hard to do when it hardly ever happens.

      Thanks friend.

  12. rick-bob McSEC June 23, 2014 at 7:06 am #

    “we lost and don’t know how to do it graciously” still defines Bama. Grow up, college football is cyclical.

  13. Pommostaclenes June 23, 2014 at 9:55 am #

    We just roll with “We Beat Bama”. We’ll be doing it again this year. Nothing beats singing Rammer Jammer to an empty Bryant-Denny-Tuberville Stadium.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 10:38 am #

      You forgot to say “if all the stars and planets align like they have to in order for us to beat Alabama.”

      See, I helped you. You’re welcome.

  14. this is going to be fun June 23, 2014 at 10:00 am #

    ” We want bama !” Main reason is when you hit them bitches in the mouth , they fold like a cheap tent. bama is nothing more than a bully. They buy *** oops *** recruit the best players in the nation , and the mere thought of that is enough to mentally beat teams before the game even starts. You punch them in the mouth from the start , and don’t let up, you will kick their ass. I mean you had a team that had the NC at their finger tips , and they got grudge fucked by Auburn to the tune of 300 yards rushing and 34 points. How do you get ” caught off guard ” when you are playing for so much? Lack of prep by lord saben? Lack of heart by the players? Then bama had a chance to earn some of their pride back , but yet they got physically beat again by Oklahoma. Auburn showed everyone the blueprint to beating saben and the tide. Punish them physically , and when they are in the fetal position bracing for another attack, you speed shit up. By the time they realize it , you are in the end zone celebrating. Gus & Company are filling the bammer heads with ” we are going to go faster ” but why is Auburn stocking up on bigger / more physical backs? PLEASE come into this years Iron Bowl thinking Auburn wants a Track meet. We are now also to believe that bama will be ready this time around? After losing EVERY play maker off their defense, and adding Lame Kitten to the staff? The mighty has truly fallen. lol

    • nope June 23, 2014 at 10:19 am #

      The mighty has truly fallen?

      Maybe the mighty just needs to make any one of four field goals. Wow.

      Wait, no, you’re right, explain some more about how terrible Alabama was last year. So terrible. You mentioned 300 yards but didn’t Alabama have more? So that can’t be it. I’m so confused.

      • Will June 23, 2014 at 10:50 am #

        But if they were as great as you claim they are they don’t have to worry about making those field goals. They would have just scored TD’s right? You can’t put that loss on a kicker. The greatest quarterback on this history of the school just couldn’t get it done against a mediocre at best defense. Why is that? You can deflect all you want but you know they truth.

        • nope June 23, 2014 at 11:11 am #

          I don’t put the loss on the kicker. After all, if any one of four missed field goals were made and Alabama took a knee to end the Iron Bowl nobody would have credited the kicker with the win.

          I don’t put the loss on a lineman’s finger moving that took away a first down because they called that a false start. I don’t put the loss on two fumbles after long drives or telegraphing the snap count on a 4th down play at the 21-yard line after missing so many field goals.

          You’re right. Alabama is a terrible football team. I know the truth. Auburn will have “another” cake walk over Alabama, just like last year. Alabama got lucky for 3 out of the last 5 national championships.

          Good luck on the multiplication tables quiz this Wednesday.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 11:17 am #

            I just wish we had five top recruiting classes and a proven coaching staff that has won it all three times.

            Oh wait…

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 12:14 pm #

            I’m pretty sure I never said they were terrible. The fans are, but the team is good. I don’t think that can really be debated. You being so defensive about a team losing a game that you had nothing to with is funny. I never said any of those things. Damn you’re sensitive about this. Bama lost. Get over it. Which hurt more 2010 or 2013? Quiz is Friday dude.

          • The Conduit June 23, 2014 at 8:24 pm #

            @Will

            Which hurt more?

            Honestly, the worst “hurt” I remember was losing to Florida in the SEC title game. It was a battle of the best.

            That was three Alabama national championship wins ago, the first in Saban’s tenure at the Capstone. It was a catalyst, but damn, it hurt.

            [img]http://famousface.us/wp-content/gallery/tim-tebow/tim-tebow-23.jpg[\img]

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 10:43 am #

      Does “kicking one’s ass” mean officials missing FOUR downfield blocks on one passing play to enable an illegal tying touchdown?

      Or does it mean winning in a way that’s only happened in the 120 year history of college football THREE times?

      Or relying on an opponent to miss FOUR fieldgoals throughout the course of a game?

      If so, man, getting one’s ass kicked isn’t so bad…or probable.

      Only you intoxicated koolaid slurping aubies think this season is going to resemble ANYTHING what you saw last year. Time to pay up.

      • Will June 23, 2014 at 11:00 am #

        Why don’t you cry about it a little more. It may change the outcome of the game.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 11:06 am #

          My goodness, are you 12? Does your mom know you’re on her computer?

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 12:16 pm #

            No she doesn’t. She died a few years ago. Well maybe she does? Not sure how that whole afterlife thing really works. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind though.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:11 pm #

            I’m sure she died mighty proud of you.

          • nope June 23, 2014 at 12:53 pm #

            While we were talking, Auburn claimed another national championship for a season they couldn’t play in the national championship game.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:07 pm #

            And Alabama still lost the 2013 bowl and you’re still really upset about it.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:10 pm #

            The worst team we’ve had in five years was a miracle away from playing in the final BCS game…you know, the one that Abarn FAILED in. Yeah, I’m devastated.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:46 pm #

            Worst team in 5 years huh? There will ALWAYS be some kind if excuse with Alabama fans. It’s either the refs fault, someone was cheating, they came out flat, the OC that the micromanager Saban hired, the weather wasn’t good, their vaginas hurt, or whatever else you can think of. It’s never they didn’t make the plays they needed to make to win. Just stop whining except your team got out coached and out played and move on.

      • Gibson June 23, 2014 at 12:35 pm #

        Are you back on the “ref” thing again? Does Steve Shaw coming out saying it was the correct “no call” not settle anything? Excuse!

        If they hadn’t won “in a way that’s only happened in the 120 year history of college football THREE times”, they still would have won in overtime. It’s called momentum, and it was all on Auburn’s side. Excuse!

        Why did the kicker miss 4 field goals? Could the greatest coach in the world not coach him up better? After the second miss, maybe he shouldn’t have put him out there. Who’s fault was that, the ref’s? Excuse!

        Face it, Auburn won. It was a great game. I don’t care if bammer came out flat or not, Auburn won. If Nick Saban is the greatest coach in the world, he should have made sure they didn’t come out flat. But, I guess that was the ref’s fault as well. Excuse!

        Excuses, excuses, excuses, etc……

        I have no idea how the season will turn out, but Auburn will be competitive. Will they beat bammer? I don’t know. We will have to wait and see.

        Now, every bammer will say “there’s no way Auburn will be bammer.” This may be true, but I’ll wait to see how it plays out before I bow down to the gump masses.

        • nope June 23, 2014 at 12:57 pm #

          Excuses?

          We’re talking about why Alabama won’t be any good. You keep focusing on everything that went wrong for them in one miraculous game, but to use that logic to say that’s why Alabama is such a terrible team and it doesn’t make sense why so many people hold up “WE WANT BAMA” signs instead of “WE WANT THE BIGGEST LOSER” or, “WE WANT THE TEAM THAT CLAIMS TITLES FOR TITLE GAMES WE SAW ANOTHER TEAM WIN”

          It took well over a dozen different things Alabama did wrong or that Auburn had no control over (watch that “false start” again) to determine that game. Great game? Maybe. Better team? Is it really that much of a stretch? Good grief. Unreal.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:04 pm #

          You mean the damage control over the SEC’s bellcow being cheated by a terrible no call? Faaaaaantastic! Blockers have never been able to engage defenders 4-5 yards downfield on a pass play, and can’t still today.

          So you can predict past happenings that didn’t happen? Faaaaantastic!

          Yeah, because a head coach should lose confidence in a kicker that otherwise had a good season. Faaaaaaantastic!

          It was a great game, but even the most delusional barner has to admit the laundry list of mistakes AU had no control over that put it in your lap. Not like 49-00 or 42-14, scores you’ll never achieve against Bama. And that’s faaaaaantastic!

          And I can tell you right now, your next cyclical shot at beating Alabama is in 2017. We will pound you the next two seasons in ways you’ll not want your children to see.

          And it’ll be faaaaaaaantastic!

          • Gibson June 23, 2014 at 1:51 pm #

            Who’s we?

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm #

            Give me “What does the rest of the college football world say when they hear a barner say ‘We all know Auburn is gonna win it all this year!'”, Alex.

          • HurryUpNoHuddle June 23, 2014 at 1:57 pm #

            i know Jay Prosch is a big man but sorry to burst your bubble he was a fullback and eligible receiver therefore allowed to be more than 3 yards down field

            no offensive lineman was more than 3 yards down the field…..it was the right call so deal with it

            also you can have your 49-0 and 42-14 nobody but bama and Auburn fans will remember those games as most people turned them off in the first quarter

            in 10 years if you ask the common football fan of another team what was the score of the 2012 Iron Bowl? and their answer will be uhhhhh i cant remember, Auburn was bad that year, bama won

            ask the same fan about 2013 “kick six” Iron Bowl and the answer will likely resemble “oh man that game was epic from start to finish, awesome way Auburn won that on the final play!”

            the kick six is the new Flutie hail mary, stanford-Cal omg the bands on the field!

            before every bama game you watch this season, before every college football game you watch this season you will see you will see Chris Davis running down the sideline

            in a million years when humans have evolved beyond sports, somewhere (probably south bend) there will be a museum and in a corner in that museum will be a vault titled the history of college football and in that vault will be film of Chris Davis running down the sidelines being chased by bama players and they will never catch him

            like the announcer from ESPN said, they will chase him forever

            49-0? psssh its not even the worst Auburn lost that year

            the kick six will live FFFOOORRRREEEEEVVVVEEEERRRR

            deal with it

  15. Dickie Pearson June 23, 2014 at 12:54 pm #

    Please remember this. Jesus hears all this profanity! Is it really worth it over a game played mostly by kids?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 12:58 pm #

      Well said Dickie.

  16. TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 1:23 pm #

    It’s as if the whole idea behind “We want Bama” is entirely lost on this “writer”.

    Why does “insert team here” want Bama? Do they want a beating? No they want Bama because they obviously think bama is over rated and that they can beat them.

    “We want bama” is essentially the population saying “we don’t think you are as good as you think you are”, and somehow this “writer” takes this as some kind of accomplishment or “having arrived”?

    As far as beating bama being a “benchmark for success” and making or breaking their season. I think it’s obvious Auburn was excited after beating bama the way they did last season. Bama was confident, most bama fans thought Auburn had no chance at defeating them, yet there was the score locked up with 1 second left, tied, stalemate, Alabama unable to prove any dominance when Chris Davis took a 56 yard FG attempt (do they have Sebastian Janikowski on scholarship?) all the way to the other endzone for a “walk off” moment in sports that will not likely be duplicated in our lifetimes. Especially where these two bitter rivals are concerned. Alabama fans laughed at Auburns chances all season and all week heading into the game. That Saturday morning while both buses were boarding in Montgomery Alabama to head down to the plains fan after fan circled the Auburn buses as they loaded and the Alabama fans screamed and did their best impersonation of low class trailer park losers while one particularly insane truck circled the bus time after time with an “elephant horn”.

    And lets not forget Las Vegas, who said Alabama should win by double digits.

    This was not just a simple victory like the “sack brodie” game. This was a moment in Iron Bowl history that will be replayed for GENERATIONS to come. That moment, like it or not will out live every one of us and that is why there was such a big ordeal made of the win, because of the arrogance of Alabama fans and the sheer unlikely nature that ended the game.

    “We want bama”, we want bama indeed

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:25 pm #

      Truly a stupid post by a delusional poster child for little brother syndrome.

      However, you can bet the generations you mention will all recall and agree in 100% unity that it took a whole lot of this to make 2013’s win possible:

      • TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 1:40 pm #

        It’s ironic you call it stupid when the whole premise of your “article” is that “we want bama” defines college football?

        what is the definition then? that you play a scrub schedule with two quality opponents and one of the two knocked you off last year?

        I will give bama some credit for being unique this season though. When you play that juggernaut West Virginia team both of you will have former FSU backups at QB. It’s neat to think how loaded FSU must be that WV has their second stringer and Alabama their 3rd stringer as starters this year.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:48 pm #

          Who is this FSU you speak of? Oh, it’s the team your high school coach couldn’t close the deal against, breaking the SEC’s streak of 7 natty’s in a row.

          Got it. I bet Kristy can speak full well of how he has trouble finishing though.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:56 pm #

            You Gus Malzahn obsession is great. Your tears are delicious. You still can’t get over a game that happened over 7 months ago. I hope you stay miserable because of it.

          • TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 2:00 pm #

            That high school coach closed the deal against your West Virginia hillbilly midget just fine when you were ranked #1. I guess a team can only beat so many #1 teams in a season before one slips past them in the final seconds of a game.

            and truly lol at your lack of class and grasping at straws for a decent comeback throwing in Kristy Malzhan. Do you think that actually gets under my skin or something? Do you approach every interaction you have as if you are a high school girl arguing with your bff over nail polish?

            idiotic commentary shows your lack of substance.. it made me laugh, but not in the way you intended.

            you basically just said “hey watch this” trying to be funny and ended up kicking yourself in the balls

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:05 pm #

          • Gibson June 23, 2014 at 2:07 pm #

            Well, the best college football coach in the world couldn’t close the deal on the high school coach, which is why he didn’t earn the right to play FSU.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:10 pm #

            No team has beaten Nick Saban two years in a row while at Bama.

            Chew on that as you fantasize about your high school sweater vest nerd.

          • Gibson June 23, 2014 at 2:17 pm #

            LSU beat bammer in 2010 and 2011. Next.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:53 pm #

            And we’ve rattled off 3 in a row over LSU since.

            How’z that winning streak coming against the Bengal Tigers for y’all? Oh wait…

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 2:39 pm #

            The high school coach that out coached the greatest coach in the history of coaching is what I think you meant to say.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:47 pm #

        • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:49 pm #

          Saban also lost to one of the louisanna directional schools not so long ago too.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:56 pm #

            Well, 2007 was actually 7 seasons ago. Good try though.

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:58 pm #

            7 years is a long time huh? Still happened though didn’t it? Just ignore everything that doesn’t help you make whatever point it is you’re trying to make. I’m pretty sure no one is afraid of bama though.

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:07 pm #

            Dear Idiot,

            That was 2007, Saban’s first year, playing with Mike Shula’s recruits. Since that season he’s 71-9. Your team lost as many games in the season before last than Nick Saban has lost in the six seasons that followed that year.

            Please stop talking. For society’s sake I just pray you’re already in jail somewhere.

            Sincerely,
            ITK

          • Will June 23, 2014 at 2:37 pm #

            Still getting angry? If Saban is so great shouldn’t he have been able to beat whatever directional school it was even with Shula’s players? Sounds like just another excuse to me. Alabama should never lose to a sun belt team no matter what coaches kids were on the team. So what was the excuse for losing to Utah? Weren’t those his players? I’m sure you have one already line up.

      • Will June 23, 2014 at 1:53 pm #

        Out coaching Saban on the last play of the gane was luck guys. It was luck there just happened to be a guy under the goal post waiting for it to be short. It was they had the return on. It was luck Saban wasn’t smart enough to teach his field goal team to cover a long field goal. Nothing but luck guys….

    • nope June 23, 2014 at 2:52 pm #

      It’s hard to have the hardest schedule when you ARE the hardest team to beat. See how that works? See how everyone playing against Alabama has a “harder” schedule? See how that works? “WE WANT WICHITA” much?

    • nope June 23, 2014 at 3:04 pm #

      They want Bama because Alabama is overrated?

      Then why don’t they hold up “WE WANT tOSU” signs?

      Why don’t they hold up “WE WANT CLEMSON” signs?

      Why don’t they hold up “WE WANT MICHIGAN” signs?

      It’s the same reason Formula 1 teams get excited to beat Ferrari, or soccer fans get excited to beat Italy, or those diaper-wearing dottering old idiots from the 1970’s Miami Dolphins team doing a champagne toast every time a 7-0 team finally loses a game in the NFL. If you can’t be the best, your goal is to beat them because you have to be elite to do it.

      After all, look at what happened to Texas A&M and Oklahoma—–they won against Alabama and the next thing you know they’re getting over one hundred million dollars worth of overdue stadium rennovations. Coincidence?

      No, it’s because Alabama is overrated, right?

      Listen to me. This is living history. Don’t fight it. You don’t have to love it. It’s ok if it sucks. But don’t discount that this is an exciting time to be in as a college football fan watching Nick Saban coach at the program “WE WANT”

      • ITK June 23, 2014 at 3:21 pm #

        @nope

        Congratulations! You win!

  17. HurryUpNoHuddle June 23, 2014 at 1:31 pm #

    what the idiot author doesn’t realize about those pics of “we want bama” signs that he posted in the article is the caliber of teams whose fans are saying that and the reason they are

    a closer examination shows that

    pic #2 is some FCS or DII school no ones ever heard of
    pic #3 is Kansas, they won 3 games last year
    pic #4 is Ball St, yes MAC member Ball St.
    pic #5 is Florida, went 4-8 last year
    pic #6 is Northern Illinois, another Mid-American Conference member
    pic #7 is a pee wee team, seriously you included that picture in your little article trying to puff out your chest about how teams “want” bama????

    all of these teams fans are making fun of themselves for being in a small conference (as small as pop warner in fact lol) or having bad seasons (notice the lol jk on the Florida sign)

    pic #8 is LSU and they probably did actually want bama

    pic #1 could be Oregon, it is their school colors but no logos in the pic to confirm and they do run the HUNH and that gives bama fits (its why your sacred little coach tried to get it secretly outlawed during the offseason) so they could want bama

    pic #9 is West Virginia, they went 4-8 last year and couldn’t possibly just be trying to hype up their season opener could they? nah that couldn’t be it, they do run the HUNH and after seeing Oklahoma running roughshod over bamas azz after Auburn took what little heart and soul they had, WVU could figure they a chance might want them too

    also Northern Illinois once beat bama so they actually want them again so you got those feathers to stick in your hat

    and honestly at the end of last season every team would have rather played bama than played FSU, Auburn, Michigan St, Oklahoma, etc

    also another possibility is that on the back of these signs is the rest of the statement they are trying to communicate (front) “we want bama” (back) “to play by the same rules everybody else has to”

    seriously though if writing silly childish stuff like this makes you feel better about yourself by all means go ahead but to let you in on a little secret stuff like this is the reason all other fans from across the country point at bama fans and laugh

    now bama is always going to be a good team, especially with the ridiculously easy schedule they always play but i will say this….you know the saying “don’t look in the review mirror cause you never know who is gaining on you”? well you can go ahead and look because you’ve already been passed…thats AuburnFAST =)

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:36 pm #

      No, what makes me feel better about myself is chumps like you eaten up by little brother syndrome.

      The only point your drivel made sense was when you wrote “Seriously though…”

      • TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 1:52 pm #

        honestly don’t you feel the whole “little brother syndrome” is a bammer version of playing the race card? something you point to as an excuse when you have no reply for the information presented to you?

        Lets be honest a person has to be in their 40s or 50s to even begin to remember a time of bama dominance.

        most of the age demographic that surfs the web and reads pages like this are not going to be in that age. They will be of the age to remember Tubberville beating bama every year regularly like there was no question. They remember the plays made by men like Cam Newton and the only notable time they can recall of Joe Namath on TV was his drunken pick up attempt of a reporter.

        there is literally nothing to “little brother”. it is simply what insecure fanatics like yourself have to tell yourself to help you sleep at night. Bama fans like yourself can say you are “big brother” but you are the only ones naive enough to actually believe it. Recent history supports alabama being the little brother actually.

        But go on, and tell me how a team scores 34 points by luck and accident

        what a sad sad lil “common-tater”

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:00 pm #

          TM, quit embarrassing yourself.

          “Recent history” has Bama winning it all three out of the last five years. You can try to bathe yourself to wash the truth away, but it just won’t go away.

          One dip of the toe in the pool of success does not a dominate program make. Unless you’re little brother.

          Weeeegle!

          • TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 2:08 pm #

            think about these 7 years you are so proud of.. then imagine you actually won all of those years like Auburn did ..

            that’s what it’s been like to be an Auburn fan..

            having your heart ripped out watching the “Camback” game and the “kick bama kick” game is what you have experienced.

            to truly dominate you do what Tubberville did to bama, allow no hope.

            saban hasn’t been able to do to Auburn what Tubberville did to alabama and he never will, and that is what makes you little brother, and articles like this exhibit A of little brother syndrome

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:16 pm #

            Saban hasn’t been able to shut Auburn out twice, and beat them another time by 28 points on their own turf…and another time yank a win right out of their disease-ridden mouths?

            Yes he has. You need to re-watch 2008, 2009, 2011 and 2012.

            Nice try on the reverse little brother scheme too. Pretty sure the one with 15 National Titles to your 2* ain’t little brother. But again, you’re a barner. Logic escapes you.

          • TMontgomery June 23, 2014 at 2:23 pm #

            so what you’re saying is, 2 in a row is dominance?

            good to know…

            probably because thats as high as you can count

            your 15 in a row don’t impress me what so ever..

            I didn’t see George Wallace standing at the door telling black kids they couldn’t go to college there and I didn’t see any games won or lost around that time or before either so if I was going to choose an event from bammer history to be shocked at, guess which one I choose.. I’ll give you a hint, it has nothing to do with black and white plaid ..

            and please quit calling it hounds tooth Bryants hats were mostly plaid

          • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:52 pm #

            Our 15 in a row “don’t” impress you… ?

            Now I know what kind of intelligence I’m dealing with. BTW, I’d like Supreme in my ride, not the 87 you normally pump.

            And nice run-on sentence. Appreciate you dipping some 50 years into the past to try and desperately make a point. Of course a barner having to go 50 years back for anything shouldn’t be surprising.

        • Gibson June 23, 2014 at 2:04 pm #

          Big brother got owned.

      • HurryUpNoHuddle June 23, 2014 at 2:08 pm #

        yeah usually morons cant make sense of anyting

        hey im glad the moron author used pics of a PEE WEE team that “wants” bama because thats usually the caliber of bamas schedule

        ranked 96th toughest schedule out of 125 teams….east peasy

        played just 3 tough games last year and went 1-2. not impressive at all

        also when you go to walmart to buy your mesh back hat and PBR, pick up some butt hurt creme too you need it bad HAHAHA

        AuburnFAST…..all they need is :01

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:18 pm #

          That is the gayest thing I’ve ever seen anyone write on here. The sad thing is, I’m pretty sure you’re an adult. You wrote it, thought about it, then said, “Yep, that looks about right.” [submit comment]

      • this is going to be fun June 26, 2014 at 7:49 am #

        Little Brother syndrome? Please show me 1 Auburn website where the site’s MAIN WRITER/POSTER writes 99% of his stories about bama? You, my ignorant little bammer, are the purest form of ” little brother” there is. You wake up in the morning with Auburn on your mind. Capstonereport is AUsports.com 2.0 .

    • nope June 23, 2014 at 3:06 pm #

      I love how Alabama’s schedule always gets marked against them.

      See, you have to play Alabama, therefore your schedule is very hard. Alabama can’t play the best team, the hardest team, the team that would affect their schedule strength the most. See how that works?

      No, you don’t.

  18. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 1:46 pm #

    Auburn is being taking seriously coming into this season. The SEC is again loaded with talent. Let’s just wait until the fall and see how the season works itself out. Personally I think Alabama and Auburn fight it out for the west and Georgia wins the east. I hope South Carolina doesn’t win the east Spurrier has pretty much owned Saban. For that fact Spurrier has always owned Bama.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 1:54 pm #

      USCe will be loaded this year for sure. Spurrier owned everybody in the 90’s, but to be fair he hasn’t exactly had a regular shot at the Tide since.

      2005 – lost to Bama at home 37-14
      2009 – lost to Bama in T-Town 20-6
      2010 – won at home 35-21

      So that makes him 1-2 against Alabama in his return to college football. Man, your bar for dominance must really be low.

  19. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 1:47 pm #

    Taken*

  20. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 2:04 pm #

    I was referencing Sabans LSU years 2000 florida beat LSU 44-9 in 2001 he beat LSU 45-15. Of course Spurrier had an 8 year run at florida that few will rival from 1993-2001 he won 6 sec titles played in 2 national championship games and won 1. Back to the point, if we get good quarterback play we should win the west. Who do y’all think wins the east?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:13 pm #

      Spurrier’s years at Florida in the 90’s were epic. It’s amazing to think about what would’ve happened if he had waited it out and stayed there.

      I’m not sure who you’re referring to when you say “we”, but I think with only average quarterback play Alabama wins the West. The only folks not completely stoked about the incoming QB Jake Coker for the Tide are barners. But I really believe USCe wins the East going away.

  21. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 2:36 pm #

    It meant Alabama when I said we. I’m kinda with you, unless Pruitt can produce on defenses his first year with all that talent he has at Georgia. I see Bama and USCe in Atlanta as well. You think that hoser in Gainesville loses his job this year?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:49 pm #

      I think you’re right. You can’t drop F-bombs on the sidelines on camera and lose and keep your job. You can do it (sadly) and win and keep it, but he’s in over his head.

  22. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 2:53 pm #

    Yeah, too big of a job for a first time head coach. He has plenty of talent, we will see this fall I guess. Gotta get back to work, last question personally with the way he is recruiting and continues to I think Sumlin will have success over the next few years. What say you?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 2:58 pm #

      I believe Kevin Sumlin is a better coach than Johnny Manziel let folks believe. The cupboard wasn’t bare when Sumlin got there, but defensively they’ve proven it was dang near close. I think A&M’s defense improves this year and they remain a contender in the West, but it’ll be hard to replicate what Johnny Football was able to do while there. You don’t have to coach that hard when you have a freak like that on your team.

  23. Mike June 23, 2014 at 3:37 pm #

    Who is this ITK and how in the hell are you allowed to write a column? Why don’t you have your real name out there? Hell, I wouldn’t either if I was writing stupid shit on the internet like this. You need a code name to help save you from getting your ass whipped if I had to guess.

    I admit, Alabama has had a good run the last several years and they have won some National Championships. But, if you want to talk about luck, let me remind you that in 2011 your mighty Crimson Tide weren’t even the Western Division Champs and they got back in the national championship because some dumbass teams couldn’t close the deal. How do you feel not even being division champs nor SEC champs yet you are national champs. Do you have any shame? LSU didn’t show up that night and if you think it is something special to beat Les Miles with that much time to prepare then you are a bigger idiot than I thought. Alabama shouldn’t been in that game. Then 2012, the same damn thing. Other teams losing and letting Bammer slip back into the game. That was really something special by beating Notre Dame. There were 7 or 8 teams from the SEC that would have whipped Notre Dame’s ass that year. So, don’t tell me about luck. There was no luck in Auburn rolling up 300 yards rushing against the mighty Tide defense last year. Auburn beat the Tide and you obviously can’t handle it. It seems real funny to me that every year Auburn is down that Alabama has this lucky success. Someone said it earlier, Saban and Bama have not beaten a good Auburn and that is true. Saban is a good recruiter but not a great game day coach as witnessed in last year’s Iron Bowl. National Championships aside, I think that Bama should concentrate defending Bryant – Denny Stadium (aka Jordan Hare West) since the mighty crimson tide’s record against Auburn is 2 and 7. That is something to be proud of.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 6:55 pm #

      Are you done? Because you pick and parcel half truths and lightly selected facts better than a drunk UPS man. I won’t begin to pick most of your B.S. apart, though it’s ever so tempting. Keep telling yourself that the probation years were real though. Go on. What’s hilarious is we STILL OWN the series even after that uneven playing field, and will your entire wretched life. You’ll NEVER see Auburn even it or take the lead. Oh wait, unless we wake up one morning and read that Jay Jacobs and company have found some rogue poll somewhere that awarded 1980, 1981, 1984, 1985, 1990, 1991, 1992, 1994, 1996, 1998, 1999, 2001 to Auburn. Don’t laugh, it could happen.

      Personally I love the way you want to dismiss other teams losing in order for other teams to get their chance, as if you wouldn’t have thrown up all over yourself to make that happen for your sorry Tigers in 2004. It’s part of the game, joke. Come out of your bunker and realize it happens every year.

      My question is, did you put yourself to bed the night after Bama destroyed LSU (probably in your wife’s pajamas) telling yourself “LSU didn’t show up”? The rest of the world saw the best defense in college football history preventing LSU from crossing the 50 all night long. But for your conscience we’ll say LSU didn’t show up.

      And I love the way you casually say “Bama has had ‘a good run’ the last several years…and won ‘some national championships'”, as if you wouldn’t sever your own testicles from your body with a rusty spoon in exchange for the glory the Crimson Tide have shoved down your throat in the run you want to believe is over.

      Friend…and I mean that, because I know you probably need one, and a true friend tells you the truth when you need to hear it…one lucky win with an improbable play doesn’t “end” a run. Like I said in my article that according to your wisdom that I shouldn’t be “allowed” to write (voted for Obama, didn’t ya?), you’re gonna have to do much more than get lucky on a November night at home to make us go away. You’re going to have to do something your rag-tag, glorified Division 1-AA program has NEVER…EVER…done.

      Sustain success.

      You’re great at flashes in the pan. An occasional spark, quickly doused by everyone sitting up, taking you seriously, then slapping you back to 4th in the division…or as we saw in 2012, worse.

      I simply adore how you take one game and try to define the most decorated head coach in our time. You sir, are a freaking idiot. And again, I tell you that as a friend, because I care about you.

      What you should be proud of is the fact that I look past your Billy Bad Ass online personna to see the little wounded child lashing out at a faceless chit chat board opponent. With that in mind, let me apologize on behalf of all the bullies that kicked you around growing up, creating the little man syndrome that now dictates your life. I’m sure they’d apologize today if they could see how pitiful it has made you as an adult.

      Roll Tide. November’s coming.

      • Mike June 23, 2014 at 9:41 pm #

        First of all, the whole problem with you and your pathetic little life is that your whole life and your happiness in life revolves around what Alabama’s football team does. I’m sorry but whether or not Auburn wins the national championship every year or not is not going to determine my happiness. I graduated from Auburn with an engineering degree so I make my own happiness. I have a great life and it has nothing to do with how many national championships Auburn has won. Yes, I love Auburn and always will and enjoy when they have a good football team and I especially enjoy when they beat Alabama’s ass and believe me a whole lot more of that is coming. As far as your comment, November is coming. It sure is and I can’t wait. As a matter of fact, why don’t you come sit with me? I’ll give you a ticket because I’m sure you love in a trailer park and can’t afford to actually go to the game. I want you to personally see that little kid you talked about that got picked on all the time and needs a friend. Like you said, I say this because I care so much about you and I’m sure you need a friend too. I will be happy to help you see your first game in Jordan Hare West.

        And, regarding the 2004 Auburn team. They did not win it that year but I promise you they would have curb stomped every bullshit national championship team Alabama has had since little Nicky has been there. No doubt. So you can say all your bullshit that you want but you know deep down it is true. Let me remind you about the 4 first rounders on that team and as a matter of fact if memory serves me correctly, there were 3 top 10 picks in the first round. Show me where that has ever happened at Bama. Don’t think so.

        What you are is a sad little man hiding behind a keyboard acting like you are some big part of Alabama’s football program. Spewing your bullshit like you know everything about college football and how every other team is just shit compared to Alabama. Well sir, you are the one that is in for a rude awakening. That sustained success that you talk about so much, well you are about to see it but it will be coming from the eastern part of the state. You are about to see what a “high school” coach can do. I’ll take Gus over Saban any day of the week. I don’t give a damn how many championships Saban has. Gus is a winner and just as important he has class. That is something you and most of the Bama nation don’t know a whole lot about.

        War Eagle!!!!!!!

        PS let me know if you need me to send you some money for a ticket.

        • ITK June 23, 2014 at 10:41 pm #

          What’s hilarious about this post is you try and go out of your way to present yourself as a casual fan whose every breath doesn’t hang on the Auburn football program, then you immediately turn right around and paint a picture of yourself as a hate-filled, potty mouthed, imbalanced monger who is way over invested in your 1-AA program.

          Mr. Engineer, I’d be glad to meet you, because I suspect you’re nothing of the sort. In person I imagine you rarely look anyone in the eye, but suddenly grow seven feet tall when an online chit chat opportunity presents itself. The nerdy engineer in you draws you to the nerdy sweater vest coach you have. And I applaud that. Everybody needs somebody, and since women are out of the question for you, you need to connect vicariously with the football program with which you find your identity.

          After this discussion I’m actually happy Auburn beat Alabama last year. Because honestly we both know that victory is one of very few you have in this life. You seem to be a sad person. Your pocket protector, cat and late night spanktravision make up your existence. Oh, and yo Tigahs!!!

          I however do not live for Bama football. And rarely do I get personal in here. But your imbalance leads me to call you out. I’m sorry Alabama’s historic superiority to your school (an institution that’s had a half dozen different names through the years) bothers you. There is much more to life than this rivalry. Please explore that possibility.

          But don’t get your hopes up for this season. Simply hold on to what you have. Fantastic memories of a season the likes of which you’ll never see again.

          Weeeeeegle!

          Now quick…poll your pals at the Bunker or the NTYF and come up with something really clever…

  24. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 4:33 pm #

    ITK,
    Do you believe Saban and Smart have contacted LSU and Coach Chavis. He has the market cornered on stopping A&M and Auburns offensive attack. I understand LSU’s defense year in and year out has the top athletes like Alabama’s. but I think he has something there. Anybody got any thoughts on that. Schematically we know how to stop it as well, but Lsu runs a 4-3 and believes in speed. Wherein Coach Saban and Coach Smart believe in strength up the middle and assignment football. Just something to ponder on.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 7:08 pm #

      I doubt they’ve contacted Chavis, but it’s no secret on how to stop Auburn. You’ll see it several times this year. The most enjoyable will be in late November. You’ll see simplified defense in the approach to these sissy offenses.

  25. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 4:35 pm #

    Long story short our 3-4 is bigger bodied players, LSU’s 4-3 is a touch smaller and a touch faster. Is that why we are going after players like Ronnie Clark and Rashaad Evans nowadays?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 7:06 pm #

      What we’re doing is essentially creating two completely different defenses, filled with 4 and 5 star studs. What he calls the “quick twitch” defensive ends and linebackers (i.e. Rashaan Evans) will play in space against the teams that play girl football, and the bigger backers and ends (i.e. Reuben Foster) will be for the LSU’s who still play man football. We’re probably one of three teams in America that can do this.

      I really think you’ll see defense redefined this season, with one tackle, a nickel package and five linebackers playing gap contain. The sad thing is, we had beaten Auburn last year with a hybrid of this philosophy, holding them to a season low 21 points until the illegal touchdown and miracle tied and won the game. I seriously doubt you’ll see Auburn get 21 points this year against several opponents, Bama being one of them.

      • Gibson June 24, 2014 at 7:03 am #

        Illegal touchdown. Excuse.

        • ITK June 24, 2014 at 7:59 am #

          LOL. Keep reassuring yourself that what you saw was real. It’s all smoke and mirrors down there anyway.

          • Gibson June 24, 2014 at 9:45 am #

            You’re right. I guess I imagined the whole thing. Auburn didn’t really beat bammer. Bammer beat themselves. Isn’t that bammer’s company line?

  26. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 8:01 pm #

    Yeah I think teams will adapt, but the Floridas and Bamas and LSU’s of the world prove its not scheme it’s athletes no matter which side of the ball your own. Coach Smart is a good adjuster, I think Chavis is the second best defensive mind in the conference, as much as it pains me to say Muschamp is easily 3rd if not better. Should be a good year, who outside the conference is a challenger?

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 8:26 pm #

      Chavis’ track record in the SEC speaks for itself. He’s the real deal for sure. Outside the conference you can’t deny FSU’s physicality. I really think they thought they’d mow over Auburn, which Abarn’s emotion and belief in themselves alone propelled them to a 21-0 lead, which they later blew in the biggest game of their careers. But FSU’s physical nature took over. I think Oklahoma will be good again, and Oregon will do what the Ducks always do: make waves until it matters then wilt down the stretch. Ohio State and UCLA will be contenders as well. But inside the conference I’d watch out for Georgia. The UGA v. USCe game will determine the East.

  27. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 9:10 pm #

    I can appreciate that, however I personally have great disdain for fisher and florida state. I’m a south Alabamian and I despise the Bowden family. I really don’t know why but that probably is the same reason I don’t like FSU or Fisher. If Clemson had a tough nature they would have at least challenged FSU. Sorry ITK but I think FSU is easily beatable. As far as the rest I believe in Michigan state and Stanford. As far as Ohio state, Urban is regretting the day he left the most talent rich state in the union.

    • ITK June 23, 2014 at 10:53 pm #

      I hear you on the Bowden family. Terry was one of the bigger goobs to ever walk the sidelines. I didn’t mind daddy, Jeff or Tommy, but they all had a sense of blow hard to them. Jimbo I don’t mind. I actually think he’s a good guy, in as much any head coach is a good guy. But you’re right about FSU. They’re beatable for sure. Then again Alabama will be capable of beating everybody.

  28. Usafap June 23, 2014 at 11:46 pm #

    ITK, you’re a pretty good fellow. If you can’t tell by my site name I’m an Air Force veteran who now works for the Army corps of engineers. This site is good insight for a Bama fan, how long do you think Saban has left, I say 5 years.

    • ITK June 24, 2014 at 4:45 am #

      Well first, thank you for your service to our country. Things like football are simply a fun diversion to life’s real issues, which you’ve seen full well.

      This site is what it is. We just pretty much tell it like it is. No spin here. When things were bad at UA, we said it. We do currently regarding our lacking basketball program. We don’t hold back and feed you the company line like the Aubies do…their appetite and tolerance for spin is absolutely incredible. It’s what amazes me most about Auburn fans. They dont want the truth, but instead the AU VERSION of the truth. There is a difference.

      But glad you found us. Come back often!

  29. TWE June 24, 2014 at 8:21 am #

    “replaced by a true offensive genius” LMFAO

    • ITK June 24, 2014 at 8:24 am #

      Thanks for letting us know your depth of knowledge of the college game goes no further than the ticker at the bottom when SportsCenter is on.

  30. Tyler June 26, 2014 at 8:28 am #

    Here’s some facts your ignorant ass left out Nicky poo is is 6-6 against auburn, he can only beat mediocre auburn teams fact he is 0-6 against any auburn team with 9 or more wins. So to shoot your article down even more the years that little Nicky has “dominated” auburn other teams did to. These are all FACTS that you failed to mention in your little 5 year old girl rant. So when you can disprove these facts that I have force fed you please send me a telegram.

    • nope June 26, 2014 at 8:51 am #

      @Tyler

      You mean LSU?

      That’s a really Little Brother way to twist stats; Alabama sucks because…LSU lost to Auburn?

      • Tyler June 26, 2014 at 9:28 am #

        Facts Saban is 4-3 against auburn at alabama. 4-0 those years AU was 5-7, 8-5, 8-5, and 3-9. 0-3 the years AU was 9-4,14-0, and 12-2 so has nothing to do with LSU Saban can’t beat a successful auburn team facts prove it whether at LSU or bama hell the last time alabama beat a good auburn team was in 1994. Facts don’t lie my friend and there is a possibility Nicky will be 4-4 against auburn at bama after this year. Twist those stats

        • nope June 26, 2014 at 12:23 pm #

          Twist those stats? I’m not the one twisting stats, and you’re the one saying who a “good” Auburn football team is, which is just funny (beat Alabama and you’re good, right?)

          It’s just funny. Alabama misses four field goals, elects not to take a fifth, fumbles half of the entire total number of fumbles in the season itself in a single game and gains more yards, yeah, these are all “excuses” to you because you’re blinded by your cult hate for big brother (never mind the questionable touchdown), but Alabama beat Alabama again last year, just like with TAMU the year before. Let’s face it—-Alabama doesn’t miss 4 field goals against the Catamounts, they don’t fumble 4 times against Georgia Southern, and they don’t get non-motion false start penalties in the red zone against Chattanooga. And it still came down to the last second, instead of taking a knee. Let me know when Auburn is ever in that position against Alabama or puts a zero on Alabama at Alabama (never mind scoring 49 points).

          But Auburn will have as many losses again this year, and when Alabama beats them you’ll say “it doesn’t matter because Auburn was bad.” Auburn was bad last year. Alabama lost. What do you think that’s going to do?

          Be careful what you wish for. Nobody (but you?) was saying Alabama was a bad team last year or when they lost to LSU, SC and Auburn in the same season. See the difference? That’s why Alabama takes a bye-week before LSU instead and everybody takes their bye-week before Alabama (seven in one season, including a title-winning season). Know why?

          “WE WANT BAMA.”

          You try to make it an Auburn thing, but it’s still Alabama. It bugs you, and I’m sorry, but Alabama is the team to beat.

          • Tyler June 26, 2014 at 12:53 pm #

            First bama does not set the bar if auburn is good or not, just so happens bama cannot beat a team that we consider to be good. No one in their right mind would consider the 2008,2009,2011, or 2012 auburn football teams to be anything close to a good team. Also I have never one time said bama was a bad team last year, they weren’t they just got beat by Auburn, Furthermore Auburn moved their bye week so that little nicky and the inbreds would stop crying so much about it. At best bama and their fans are distant cousin’s that Auburn would never claim. bama fans are the laughing stock of the college football, whether its committing a felony and calling a radio show to brag about it, rubbing your nuts on another man, or having a fan jump on an opposing fan in the stands no one is jealous or envious period. Do you really think other fans want to be associated with that kind of stupidity and pure ignorance. Auburn does not base its season on the iron bowl, but stats prove that the 4 wins nick has against auburn at bama those auburn teams were not good teams by anyone. I just love how no one ever beats bama they beat themselves, guess what fumbles, missed field goals, bad calls they are a part of football and they happen to everyone. So in all realty no one really beats anyone the losing team beats itself right that’s what your saying. Also it took bama 4 games to ever score a point against Auburn in Tuscaloosa so know your facts before you start running your cock sucker just saying.

          • nope June 26, 2014 at 1:38 pm #

            I didn’t say nobody ever beats Alabama. Good grief.

            You really can’t see the difference, can you? I don’t care about your inability to write, punctuate or spell (they taught that to me in grade school, plus it was a prerequisite at the University of Alabama), but you can’t think straight because you’re blinded with prejudicial rage. That’s what makes Auburn’s culture cult-like—–whatever it takes to hate Alabama and praise Auburn. It’s “what are your crimes” (look it up) on this, another Alabama web site.

            You asked me to get my facts right. I have a fact for you. Auburn didn’t win the 1983 or 1993 national championship. I know this fact because, well, I remember. I literally saw it with my own eyes. There’s a fact.

            I also remember 2004. Auburn wants to claim that one, too. Auburn won the BCS title game in 2004; fact or fiction?

            Let me know when you see “WE WANT AUBURN” signs. The “fact” is, they signs say, “WE WANT BAMA” and you’re the one arguing why they shouldn’t. Don’t tell me. Tell everyone else… including Auburn fans.

  31. Tyler June 26, 2014 at 1:54 pm #

    Did I say anything about 1983,1993, or 2004. See I was waiting for the grammar insult I’m on a phone at work could care less about my spelling or punctuation. Nothing you said has anything to do with what your replying to. As you did post a reply. Which leads me to believe you can’t argue with what I said, so in right. Furthermore I know for a fact it is easier to get into alabama. And as far as ’83,’93, and ’04 by bama standards those should be claimed. You may not have said nobody ever beats bama but when bama does get beat all y’all have is excuses. So maybe your next reply won’t be full of things we weren’t even talking about.

    • nope June 27, 2014 at 7:46 am #

      You are a true little brother gem amongst terds. Never change, Tyler.

  32. Fat_Dye July 1, 2014 at 10:00 am #

    Doesn’t everyone have excuses when they lose ? Why is it just Bama ? Cause you are on a Bama site ? My little brother is full of excuses. And he’s an Auburn fan . ;) stay thirsty little freinds .

  33. bamminer July 11, 2014 at 12:17 am #

    Alabama has to prove they can stop the dual threat spread offenses. To do that, in my opinion, they need to scrap that 3-4 in those games. Unless the late great R. White is on one side of the Dline and Matt Millen is on the other side, it ‘s just not going to work–especially when they have very good Olines to counter your Dline which forces you to blitz multiple players. When this happens, you get mismatches everywhere depending on the play. To prove my point, Belichick couldn’t stop the wildcat(which did not pass); there was something different about Florida in that rematch against Alabama(no Harvin) or Alabama may have lost the rematch, too; and LSU used the 4-3 to stop AU and A&M while they were at their heights. It just common sense; if you have to blitz more than 1 often against a tricky offense, then you’re in real trouble defensively. Now, you may have an offense that can outscore another team, but you will at least be 3/5 in those match ups and you could be 1/5. If nothing else, your defense looks bad when it is so much better than that and the scheme is holding you back. My opinion.

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