Chizik is afraid

Auburn head football coach Frank Chiznik is worried about Saturday.

About the game with Clemson? Not necessarily, though he really should worry about what’ll happen when his junior varsity secondary is met with a capable passer.

About being out coached? Every time he steps on the field this is a distinct and likely possibility, especially by a former Tide player who actually exhibits a pulse.

No, abarn fans, the Chiz is afraid you won’t show up.

So afraid, in fact, Chiznik took to the world wide web (or had a staffer who could spell do so) to make a plea to the Auburn students to show up Saturday.

Can you imagine for a microsecond Nick Saban writing any faction of the Alabama fan base…students, alumni, soccer moms, anybody…begging them to show up and be…this is so gay…”All in”?

I submit to you, if GameDay aired at 3:15 a.m. central in Tuscaloosa, when the cameras came on there’d be a crimson sea of thousands of screaming people in the background.

And for a game? Please. There is a reason for the monstrous waiting list for season tickets in T-town.

Cheesedip’s plea came in the form of a “challenge”. The only challenge I can recall Saban making came in 2008 when on a radio call in show, in impromptu fashion (not a premeditated published letter on a University website) he challenged the Bama nation to make Bryant-Denny “what it ought to be” for the Mississipi State* game. Saban’s words were following the most emotional win of his tenure at that point, an overtime victory over LSU in his old stomping grounds, where he was burned in effigy and easily the most hated man in the state.

Chiz’s begging today is totally different. It’s a home game. Game Day, representing the largest sports conglomerate in the world will be there. It’s the highest profile game on their schedule so far this season, though we all know in typical ACC fashion the Clemson Tigers will probably stiffen up like a fainting goat.

This is just another difference between the two programs. The hysteria of one fanbase is an overflow of who they are and their approval for the excellence they witness week in and week out. The other is a manufactured facade, a farce…and a program robbing the lower division 1-AA of a capable contender.

Begging the students and fans to make Jordan-Hare “rocking”…. hilarious!

*The misspelling of Mississipi State is intentional and a permanent feature on this site from now on after their abysmal choke job against abarn. In effect, they don’t deserve the other “p”.

(Follow me on Twitter at ITK4BAMA for capstonereport.com news, updates and smack.)

57 Comments

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  1. 1
    julio

    So saban was different when he made the MSU challenge because in your dim witted opinion his challenge was “impromptu”??? You really think that little control freak went on the radio show without having already planned out in his mind exactly what he was gonna say?? That midget doesn’t blow his nose without having a 14 point plan and schedule in place beforehand. Get a freakin’ clue.

    It’s ok, ITK. Bama will still get plenty of press. Don’t get all nervous just because Gameday decided that Auburn was the best place to be in the college football world only one week after they picked up shop and left tuscaloosa.

  2. 2
    julio

    Still love the Frank Chiznik tag. I know you had help from the esteemed Larry Langford on that one, but that’s still the funniest thing I’ve heard here.

  3. 3
    BPI

    Really……If Nick Saban pulled a Jim Jones and told the Bammmer Nation to drink poison kool-aide , 2/3 of the state of Alabama would be dead in about an hour.

    Nick Saban actually has a mind control machine in T-town. And, he uses it to impose his will on weak minded bammers. Wait……..all bammers. You are all weak minded.

    He says for you to cheer louder in 08, and bam !!!HOOOORRAYYYY ALABAMA LAMO WHOOPED OUR ASSES BUT SABAN SAYS CHEER SO YAAYYYY…….HE WAS PISSED AT YOU IDIOTS FOR LEAVING THE UTAH GAME IN THRONGS !!!!!!!!! AND OPENLY BERATED YOU DIMWITS FOR DOING SO !!!!!!!!!! Your reply ??? Yes Master Saban….We will obey your will Master Saban.

    Bama fans are mindless.

    He scolds you like the little 5 year old retards you are ….Thou Shalt not booo Penn State…..Your reply ??? Yes Master Saban.

    Dibt even throw this bullcrap out ITK. Your coach blasts your mindless asses yearly. And, you gladly bend over and take it.

    He actually hates you people….You can tell it by his tone.

  4. 4
    pete4tide

    I agree, julia – I guess Langford was good for something other than payoffs to his cronies – be careful, though – he’ll want some sort of royalty for providing the humor to the Report.

  5. 5
    BamaBrando

    Auburn fans are such whiners. When Clemson embarrasses them at home, the crying will really start. Wow, did ya’ll read Ballplays psycho rant? Man, his jealousy is easy to see. If Auburn had just won one NC, you would see mass suicide by the Aubies, since their lifelong dream would be fufilled. Apparently all it takes to be an Auburn fan is being stupid and a love for being smacked around and disrespected.

  6. 7
    BPI

    ^^^^^^^^^^stalker^^^^^^^^^^

    I just recieved a text that said “time to die”……How did he get my phone number…..Chris Rainey was framed.

  7. 8
    BamaBrando

    Glad to see you are still all shook up Ballplay. Wipe the snot off your face and toughen up. Guess you are afraid to come out and play anymore. Is that all you got? Really?

  8. 11
    BamaBrando

    I am waiting on that internet restraining order BP. Got that done yet? I see you are still crying. So, does this mean we can’t be friends anymore?

  9. 14
    Crimsonite

    Butt plug if ya’ll had a coach that could win championships (sé where we are right now – very top o’ the world unchallenged) then you might have to figure he knows best and maybe kiss a little arse too! Jealousy is such an ugly thing to see. Bwaa Haww Haww! RTR!

  10. 15
    BPI

    No, I believe that Saban is a great coach as well. He is just an a-hole. ITK starts a thread about Chizik pleading because he is afraid. I am simply pointing out that you little Nepoolean commands you all becasue he is a d-ck, and you are weak minded.

  11. 16
    BamaBrando

    And you are an idiot ButtPlug. The only real simple minded fool here is you. Tell the new guy why you’re here. Come on man, it’s funny as hell.

  12. 20
    Crimsonite

    Weak minded, Butt Plug? Well maybe some of us. Not gonna say which ones. (You know who.) As for myself, I wouldn’t piss in the toilet instead of on the ground if Sabear told me too, unless I want too. But I will follow good advice, especially when it’s for the good of Bama’s football program – which for far too many damn years has been following s–t for advice. In three short years he’s built what will be a dynasty, and he want’s it to be classy. Something everybody from Mullets to Rocket Scientists (Yes we have those too. Huntsville, NASA.) can be proud of. Hecklers can only be tolerated for so long before they give everybody in the country the red arse at Bama. You know following his advice is a good idea; why don’t you just leave it alone. And don’t compare Sabear and Cheeze Butt for god sake. Bama sells out every game including our own spring game. Saban doesn’t have to ask us to come to any football related function at Bama. Truth is there’s never room enough for everybody anyway. That’s why what Julietta was referencing was strictly impromptu. But the Barn damn sure can’t say that. The only time ya’ll sellout anything is when a higher ranked rival comes to town. Bwaa Haww Haww! RTR!

  13. 21
    wdeinttown

    You are so right. Remember in 2004 and 2006 when Game Day was on campus and no one came!? Remember the opener this year when no one showed up because Coach Chizik didn’t pay them to come? Give me a break. All other sane people who follow Auburn football know that Chizik is not only trying to pump up the student body but is also showing appreciation to the students for their contributions. Also, answer this question for me. If Auburn has such a hard time getting people to the games then how did he get such a high turnout to an impromptu speech?

  14. 22
    BPI

    So, Chiziks good advice ASKED POLITELY AND NOT DEMANDED to the students at AU is bullcrap. But , your little Sabear can go on a little man rant and it cool ? I expected a reply just like this.

    As far as the Clemson game goes, it was selling out regardless of gameday or not. But, we have some key recruits coming this weekend, and Chizik wants the students to make everyone feel at home. Especially the recruits. Much in the same way we got some major signees after the WV rainstorm game. He wants them to show that kind of enthusiasm.

    But, yall wouldnt understand that.

  15. 23
    julio

    Saying that there is a fear that nobody will show up for ESPN Gameday in Auburn is a freakin’ joke. This is the 6th time Gameday has visited Auburn, which is the same amount of times they have been to Tuscaloosa. Gameday keeps coming back because they know there will be a great crowd. They wouldn’t come otherwise.

  16. 24
    ITK

    Okay, a few things at work here:

    Don’t discount the proximity of last week’s GameDay location to this week’s. Only 180 miles separate moving that world from T-town to the farm. There were some economic factors at play, no doubt, and it was a good business move. ESPN is the most powerful sports conglomerate in the world, but even superpowers make smarter moves while in the most devastating recession since the Great Depression.

    Also, this is a crappy football weekend. There are…count ’em…NO games between ranked teams. If Tennessee was worth anything, GameDay would be in Knoxville. If the Vols were a contender, two SEC superpowers would easily replace ACC and SEC also rans.

    Now, wdeinttown:

    1. There are no sane people who follow Auburn football.

    2. To answer your question, have you been to a college campus lately? Do you know how difficult it isn’t to get college students to anything resembling a party? Like your cheesy, gay helmet color change, pardon me if I’m not impressed that Uncle Chiz got a few hundred students to show up for his pep talk.

    3. Julia, GameDay is in Abarn because Tennessee is terrible. I’ve already said this, but it bears repeating. Clemson of the ACC vs. Clemson of the SEC isn not a substitute of any kind to Tennessee v. Florida.

    4. ButtPlug (I owe someone dearly for giving you that name), by key recruits, do you mean national recruits? Like the #3 OL in the country who committed before ever even seeing the campus? Because Bama gets those. Heck, we’ve started nabbing them from Australia too. I thought you may be focused on the Birmingham News top 11. That’s good too.

    5. Can’t wait to see the uniform change for the Iron Bowl this year. Those moves tend to work out well against us.

  17. 26
    BamaBrando

    ITK nailed it. If you are determined to be an Auburn fan, you might as well get used to being outshined by Alabama, and crying and sobbing about it only makes you look like ButtPlug and her sister/cousin Julia.

    But let Auburn have GameDay on an off-week for college football. Over half the country still won’t know where Auburn is on Monday.

  18. 27
    ITK

    I’ll gladly walk down that road with you some time wde; but let’s stay on topic today.

    AU has to employ some of the gayest, cheesiest bush league moves just to stay in the current, while BAMA dictates the current.

    I’d love to see the day Saban has to call up a fireside chat to get the fanbase ready for a big game…and Clemson isn’t really even a big game.

  19. 28
    julio

    Okay ITK, a few responses to your BS:

    1. You think the largest and most powerful sports conglomerate in the world chose to go to Auburn so they could save a few thousand bucks in gas money?? No, even looking through your crimson glasses you know that’s a ridiculous statement.

    2. If Tenn were better…If there was another game between other teams that ITK likes…if Ohio State played Michigan last weekend Gameday would have been in Ann Arbor instead of Tuscaloosa…if a frog had wings it wouldn’t bump its a$$ when it moved around…you get the picture. Gameday is in Auburn on Saturday, period. It will be the SIXTH TIME it’s been there. Yes ITK, that’s the same number of times it’s been in your beloved Tuscaloosa. It’s not like this is some type of unique event, no matter how hard you try and spin it.

  20. 29
    Crimsonite

    Well now Julietta you little whore let’s just look at some hard nosed facts when you compare Gameday at Bama and Auburn. Nobody is denying that except for a few years with Stallings, Bama has been on pretty hard times since Bear went up to sit on the right hand of God. And gameday didn’t exist even during Stallings tenure; while the Barn had its most productive years in history. So for Bama to be tied with ya’ll in my opinion is pretty damn remarkable. I do believe that we might have a fairly insurmountable lead by now if ESPN had existed in the 60’s and 70’s. Julietta I don’t think Cheeze Butt was afraid nobody would show up. I think he was worried about how many would show up, and he doesn’t want to get shown up by Alabama. After all it’s a little more difficult to entice crowds to travel into the Netherlands and stand outside in the scorching heat of a cowpasture just to act like idiots on ESPN. You see Bama has 2/3 of the state population just 40 miles up the interstate from us! I personally think Cheeze Butt was prudent in what he did. But the point here is that Sabear would never have to do that at Bama. The only problem at Bama would be in finding enough room to fit everybody in. RTR!

  21. 30
    ITK

    What you said was very stupid Julia. That’s really all I have in the shape of a response for you. There was really nothing in #2 that resembled a coherent thought.

    I’ll just leave you with this…

    Want to see paranoia live and in living color??

    COUNT HOW MANY SIGNS AT GAMEDAY REFERENCE ALABAMA IN SOME WAY.

    You’ll need two hands, and possibly your feet.

    We haunt you, Julio. We keep you up at night. Abarn fans know they are inferior, have always been inferior, and will always BE inferior.

    Their beloved has accomplished zero…zilch…jack crap…in its 100+ year history. You’re basically UAB with a longer shelf-life and more fans, but both fan bases are equally delusional.

    And all I need for proof is what you’ll see Saturday morning. There will be dozens of them, all referencing Alabama. You are our bitch. Period.

    Or else Navid Nousel wouldn’t have offered up that ultra embarrassing rant in 2005 over the radio airwaves. It is a prevailing truth, a central feeling that runs through the core of the Awhbuhn Fambly.

    And there’s nothing you can do about it…except watch us continue to tread in places your feet will NEVER touch.

    I’ve said it once, and I will say with glee over, and over, and over again.

    You will die, Julia, having NEVER seen Auburn do what I witnessed Alabama accomplish last January. And more than likely, so will your children.

    Sure, there are other things in life to enjoy, and best hold on to them. Because watching your Tiggers dominate the landscape of college football and change the face of the game in the process…it isn’t happening.

    To be the best; you’ll NEVER know how it feels. But take it from me, it feels GREAT!!!

  22. 31
    Drew

    This is why no one likes Bama fans. They get so worried and jealous that they have to talk about Auburn. Talk about your own school. And as for Chizik “begging,” I was there. He was not begging it was a hyped speech with a few thousand people there. The email about it was sent out Tuesday and thousands showed up Wednesday. Chizik was simply making lots more excitement than there already was. Just watch/listen to the YouTube video. He was saying be there at 8 to be there early. It doesn’t start at 8. Not sure if you’ve ever been to Auburn (which is actually in the list of top 10 places to visit by USA Today) but plenty of people get just as if not more excited in Auburn for game day. And there are games against tanked opponents this weekend by the way. And Auburn does have an NC. Get your facts straight and focus on your team.

  23. 33
    ITK

    Drew, this is what YOU need to understand.

    A.) WE DON’T CARE IF YOU LIKE US. Unlike Abarn, which embarks on a 365 day a year marketing/image campaign, we are great because of what we accomplish, not because of any perception we work overtime to try to manufacture for ourselves.

    B.) You nailed it about Chiznik. HE IS ALL HYPE. There is nothing tangible you can point to to give you confidence about him. He is cheesy. He is hype. He wears a gold chain. And he is ALL HYPE.

    C.) Not sure what a “tanked” opponent is. I said there weren’t games BETWEEN “tanked” opponents.

    D.) Been to Auburn. Lovely town. Very cult-like. Wanted to leave quickly.

    E.) Auburn’s NC came long before your parents ever thought about having sex to make you. Before Kennedy. Before we landed on the moon. Before air conditioning. Before the Beatles. And you were on probation, called at the time Alabama Polytechnical Institute (look it up). You’ve never won one as “Auburn”. I’m not sure you were even wearing face masks at the time.

    Thanks for stopping in. Make you a real nice sign for Saturday morning. Gee, wonder if it will reference US in any way???

  24. 34
    BamaBrando

    Drew, Ballplay, Drew and Julia being here trying to defend the ‘honor’ of Awbun is all I need to see. Awbun doesn’t sell-out every game. The fact that Chiznik is asking fans to show up is a testament to that. But ITK is right. Watch and see how many Awbun fans hold up signs slamming Bama and Saban. Last year it was Ben Tate was the best back in the state. He struck the Heisman pose on the cover of the Iron Bowl program. Bama is in the minds of every Awbun fan. Everything they do, it is always motivated by hate for Bama. But it is funny that none of them will openly admit it here. But all hate is rooted in fear.

  25. 35
    Crimsonite

    Not in your lifetime has Auburn won a National Championship. No body likes Bama fans? Gee, I’m gonna take my football and go home! Think I”ll sit in the corner and cry all day! Nope! Scratch that! Hey, everybody, listen to me! I don’t give a s__t if you like me or not! However, if you want a unbiased opinion of Bama fans outside the realm of Awbarn, Ucheat, LSWho et al; all you need to do is ask the fans of Penn St and Texas. Think you’ll get quite a different opinion. And unlike you Barners their opinion is relevant. RTR!

  26. 36
    julio

    ITK, I’ll just leave you with this…

    Want to see paranoia live and in living color??

    COUNT HOW ARTICLES THAT ITK POSTS ON THIS ALABAMA BLOG THAT ARE TOTALLY ABOUT AUBURN.

    BTW, the reference to my children’s death was really creepy you freakin’ weirdo. It’s just football we’re talkin about. What in the name of all things good and holy convinced you it was appropriate to go there??

    PS – Hate to break a “hardnosed fact” to you EG, but Gameday most certainly did exist during Stallings tenure. They started going to campuses in 1993. Kinda makes your whole argument sound kinda silly, huh?

  27. 37
    BPI

    I swear, Bammmers are certifiable. I almost bet my house that Brandi, and ITK never put on a jock. Bradi’s queerness once said he was in a freekin traveling band. ITK, you are a “journalist” (I use the term loosely). My point is , YOU TWO , have never done one thing to ever win a single game for the TAHDDD …Not only that, you two have no idea about the game, as I guaruntee you , neither of you played a snap.

    Am I right ? Have you two ever played. Pee Wee deos not count. JV and up only please.

  28. 39
    ITK

    It is just football, Julia, and believe it or not, this is just fun to me. There are far more important things in life.

    You’re well aware of the point I was making, it’s just easier to muddy the water than own up to the truth, and it pains you to reconcile that lil Johnny or Jill will never don an orange and blue national championship tee. Ever. Unless it’s for Bama or another team.

    As for paranoia, if coming on here and debunking the carefully orchestrated marketing efforts and spin coming out of Lee County is paranoia, then I’m paranoid. Personally I have a seed of truth planted in me, and hunger and thirst for the truth.

    And the truth here, in the lesser important realm of college football, is that Abarn is infested with a delusional fanbase that I enjoy making fun of, whose basis for their fanaticism is utter and absolute concocted tradition and accomplishment.

    So yes, if making fun of you and successfully pointing out what a boob one has to be to be “all in” for a program that has historically never accomplished a thing, then I’ll accept the term.

    But we both (and everyone who sees me make you look silly in here) know the truth.

  29. 40
    ITK

    By the way, BP, not only did I play, I played in college.

    Now, here’s where you say “nuh-uh!”, but I have an overwhelming amount of evidence I could put on the table to shut you up. However, I don’t care about you or your opinion that much.

  30. 41
    BPI

    No need for evidence. I believe you. And , I respect your opinion much more knowing that. That is the only reason I asked.

    Your turn Brandi.

  31. 42
    julio

    “But we both (and everyone who sees me make you look silly in here) know the truth.”

    I love it when ITK awards himself a fabricated victory. Especially when it comes at the end of a rambling, defensive diatribe that he posts in response to someone pointing out he said something really stupid.

  32. 43
    ITK

    Julia, you remind me of a kid I grew up with who I once witnessed getting slapped down to the ground repeatedly by other kids while announcing to those watching he was winning the fight. I wanted to stop it and help him, but the only way it would stop is if he shut up. He couldn’t, so he continued looking and sounding like an idiot, and had bruises to show for it.

    No one can help you but you at this point. Please stop.

  33. 44
    BPI

    Not going to get too personal (see brandi), but, what postition did you play ? Just wondering if I am dealing with a placekicker or an inside linbacker.

  34. 46
    BamaBrando

    Man, I love it! The resident gay couple is foaming at the mouth defending Awbun! Who gives a sh!t about what you guys think? You hate Bama, and that is great! I hate Awbun too! You know, we are not going to ever get along on this! This is a Bama site and you two lovebirds are here, and have your panties all twisted up cuz ITK beat you down. It wasn’t even a fair fight. BP, the waterboy would take your ass out. You act like such a whiny girl. And Julia, you really should stop. Put some ice on that head, and wipe the snot off your face, and accept the way things are. They won’t be changing anytime soon.

  35. 47
    ITK

    Julia, please…Brando, let’s just walk away. Don’t turn around and look back. This is getting harder and harder to watch.

  36. 48
    BamaBrando

    But it is like a car wreck. You know you have got to slow down and look. And if you are going to be dumb, then you gotta be tough.

  37. 49
    BPI

    Brandi, you could be a “rassler” in the WWE. Really. You talk more shit than any human being I have ever heard. And , just like the “rasslin” shows you love so much, its fake.

    I know that is a shocker….But “rasslin” is fake.

    Go pat yoursleves on the back boys….You gave us a blogbeatdown…..Yes, you win. I admit defeat.

    Now, will you shut up ?

  38. 50
    BPI

    And , are you going to answer my question ? Did you play football ?

    ITK had the nads to answer….But I doubt you do.

    But I can imagine you response…” I dont have to answer your question , I dont care what you think “…..

    I actually respect ITK in a weird adversarial ( correct me ITK ) kind of way. But your just a weenie.

  39. 51
    JohnInHuntsville

    Juliio and Brando,

    Since your team has lost to us twice in a row you are technically our bitches. You should limit your comments to the subject of Auburn football, and it’s subjugation by the mighty Crimson Tide. In every post you should politely thank the Bama nation for making the SEC the dominant conference in the nation. In doing so Bama sheds at least some glory to moribund, second-rate little ag schools whose coeds smell like fish. You should close each post with the signature “RTR” until you can beat us in the Iron Bowl, which should be about a decade from now.

    On second thought, just suck it, bitches.

  40. 52
    ITK

    I give the floor to JohninHuntsville. My friend, it’s yours here anytime you want it. Well done.

    And BP, that was actually right. I told you some time ago I’d eventually make a speller out of you. Not bad.

  41. 53
    WDEinTTown

    Actually, Alabama alone is not what makes the SEC dominant. Sure, it definitely helps to have the previous year’s national championship winner (and the front-runner for 2010) in your conference but it is the top-to-bottom quality that counts. USC dominated in the early 2000’s but did that make the PAC-10 dominant? No, because the rest of the conference could not compare to the quality of the middle and lower tier teams in the other conferences. So yes, Alabama is the dominant program in college football (for now) and thus of the SEC. But Alabama alone is not what makes the SEC dominant and great.

  42. 54
    Crimsonite

    No you stupid s__t. Why don’t you get your head out of your arse and read once in a while. Oh I forgot, you’re Julietta. Your motif is not reading worth a s__t. My point dumbarse was about the Bryant era. And thanks for verifying what I
    said about Stalling dummy. Game day started after his national championship. His final two years had probation and forfited games so game day didn’t matter. But if it had existed in ’92 we would have been on 2 or 3 times, not to mention probably 40 times during the Bryant era. So go f__k yourself. RTR!

  43. 55
    BPI

    John…..You mean BPI, you moron. I refuse to let that whiney turd Brando steal my thunder.

    If you are going to try to flame somebody, at least get their name correct.

    You and Alex are the new flagbearers for Bama class.

  44. 56
    julio

    “And gameday didn’t exist even during Stallings tenure;”

    See EG, my head was not in my arse, and I did read what you said you freakin’ nut job. You didn’t say a freakin’ word about GD not existing until after the 92 NC. You said it didn’t exist “during Stallings tenure.” Rather than giving everyone a vivid demonstration on how far your Turret’s Syndrome has advanced, why don’t you sit down and read what you typed yourself.

    PS – It really doesn’t matter what “point” you were trying to make.

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