PROOF: Auburn fans suffer mental illness

Auburn fans could be members of the Peter Pinguid Society with all the conspiracy theories and lies they spread about rivals. To wit, on Thursday and Friday the Alabama Department of Revenue raided car dealerships in Fort Payne, Gadsden and Anniston. What is a Peter Pinguid member to do? Connect the raid to Alabama.

According to Track Em Tigers, “While the reason for the raid is unknown at this time, it can be mentioned that this is the same dealership that is rumored to have improperly provided vehicles at little or no cost to players of a certain school, all funneled through a certain booster club. Whether or not today’s investigation is linked to this rumor is pure speculation. You’ll have to draw your own conclusions in time.”

Pathetic. The mental gymnastics these Auburn people go through to make anything that happens fit into some grand Alabama cheats rumor borders on mental illness. This is everything wrong with SEC football.

We should worry for the Auburn nation’s sanity. What will happen when those Gadsden rumors turn out to be nothing? What usually happens to wackos? Last year it was all about the Escalade. That didn’t pan out, so they invented a new lie. Pinguids would be proud.

(You can read about the car dealerships and an accounting firm being searched at the Ft. Payne Times Journal and Gadsden Times.)

30 Comments

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  1. 1
    julio

    Cappy, I still love how you find one blog post about a subject and try to pass it off as the unified voice of all Auburn fans. If that’s the case, then Shane represents the universal voice of the entire Bama nation. Oh well, I’m sure Track’em Tigers appreciates the free advertising via the link you provided to the blog. Strange, but I don’t recall that blog ever mentioning the Capstone Report.

  2. 3
    capstonereport

    That blog never mentions this blog? And that means what?

    That they have horrible taste? We already know that since they are Auburn fans.

    That they are incapable of good judgment? Again, that is made redundant by the label Auburn fan.

    That they are afraid of the truth? Again, redundant. Of course, if my coach was Gene Chizik, I’d probably be afraid of the truth too. Look at how many Alabama fans were afraid of the truth when Mike Shula was coach. 🙂

  3. 5
    capstonereport

    Maybe someone should write a Jacobian revenge play called The Booster’s Tragedy. Actually, maybe I’ll give that a try.

  4. 6
    Auburn is a Joke formerly the fan known as Ballplay Indian

    Cap……Most of the Auburn Nation looks at stories like that with a high degree of skepticism. But for you to say that there is no way that its remotely possible is highly optimistic of you. Not the story of the car dealership raid, but the whole possibility that Bama signees were provided transportation. Its almost like you are being a little hyper sensitive about it. Heck man, were you the guy that bought the Charger ?

  5. 7
    capstonereport

    You are right Ballplay—most fans on both sides of the rivalry are more rational than what appears on talk radio and the Internet.

    I haven’t said the stories of benefits are true or untrue.

    What I am saying is that Auburn has become a sad and pathetic family where their only hope of success is for something bad to happen to its rival.

  6. 9
    bamaandjrfan

    Anyone know a site where I can get up to date on bama stuff?? All these aubie sites are getting ridiculous!

  7. 10
    Auburn is a joke formerly the fan known as Ballplay Indian

    Dude….Did you just say that ? You Bammers have a short memory dont you ? Now that yall had a good year , all the heartache of the streak is a distant memory………..Around year three, the bile being spewed at Auburn was non-stop. And yes, you turds accused us of cheating at every turn. Remember dillweed Shane and his Chette crusade ? Dude , you are full of crap.

    Here lies the ONLY difference between what your fans did and what Auburn fans did. You guys are blowing gaskets left and right, and fighting mad about it. We just sat back and laughed. You see , we knew we had nothing to worry about, even with the sociology thing. But you guys know what kind of idiot boosters you have, and you ARE worried. I would have to say that BAMA has the all time title on psycho , idiotic, crap filled, fans and boosters.

  8. 11
    E.G White

    LMFAO!!! No, the real truth is that Bama has everything and Auburn only has the scraps it can grab when we’re down. And the only reason we’re ever down is when the petty jealousy and hate from other SEC schools boils over into a concerted f–k Bama conspiracy and we end up being the only one paying for the same sins that ‘EVERYONE IS COMITTING’! Listening to the continuos ‘Bama Is A Cheater’ broken record that plays nonstop around the self rightous SEC is enough to make anyone nauseous. And we all know who the ringleaders are. They have one common color among them. It’s what you get when you mix Bama ‘Crimson’ and ‘YELLOW’ together! RTR!

  9. 12
    julio

    errr, EG….I don’t think it was another school that turned Bama over for the textbook scandal. I think it was a student at the University of Alabama making 7 bucks an hour that “discovered” what the bama compliance office “overlooked”. I guess you’d have us believe that it was actually Chette Williams gone undercover posing as a 19 yr old white Alabama student that turned Bama in.

  10. 13
    Bamafan

    Cap, Micheal Savage wrote a book a few years ago with a catchy title “Liberlism is a Mental Disorder.” Maybe you could write “Believing in Auburn Conspiracies is a Mental Disorder.”

  11. 15
    tabwhiz92NC

    As a close associate of the University, I really want to see an objective opinion of this Gadsen situation. We’ve been asking Paul to do it, do some investigative journalism like he used to do. Be a reporter. Not a blogger with no oversight a legit news reporter. Expose it now. The bunker boyz have been on this story for awhile. Why did Booby from homewood disappear? Is he behind these Gadsen rumors. Please create a flowchart on what went down.I thought we got the ncaa out of this business, looks like they are waking up again. God Bless you all. RTR.

  12. 16
    capstonereport

    I agree that a real journalist—not a talk radio host or newspaper columnist—should investigate these types of stories. Something like the News did with its investigation of the two year college system.

    One problem is that even when you investigate something, it is very hard to disprove the rumors. If you notice, the rumors change rapidly. One year it is Escalades. A few months later it shifts from Mobile to Gadsden and now it is another car.

    If you want my opinion, I believe some people on the Internet (and callers on the radio) have a nefarious agenda in everything they write and say.

  13. 17
    Auburn is a joke formerly the fan known as Ballplay Indian

    egghead………You get “down” when your crimson necked boosters get a little crazy with the chargers and escalades. You also get “down” when your doosher BOT hire “in da famlee” coaches like Dubose and Shula. It has nothing to do with jealousy, just spastic decisions by your leadership. Oh yeah, your about to get “down” because of free textbooks. Typical Bammer delusion. I guess you think it was Pat Dye that really paid Albert Means coach………….Dork.

  14. 18
    E.G White

    Julio I’m not talking about the text books. That is so minor and seriously insignificant that only the NZAA could consider it a violation. I’m talking about BS like Escalades and Gadsden and Albert Means. All of the above, whether rumor or fact are things that every competitive school in the SEC has done – whether they have been caught or not. Ballplay – Bama’s problems with coaches stemed directly from a 12 year bout with the NZAA, probation, scholly limitations, forfiture of almost an entire season of wins, a bowl ban and the loss of a certain SEC championship by a championship game ban. Although Albert Means may have been the final nail in the coffin, it was a conspiracy between all three of the orange colored schools and their coaches of that period to turn us in for the same crimes their school have also commited over the years. But even more than this is the importance of how the fu-kiing NZAA originally got Bama’s spore in their nostrils and subsequently got a hard-on for us. It all began with corruption within the ‘Auburn Family’ when your boosters paid Gene Jelks to tell the NZAA that Bama tried to bribe him to play for us. The NZAA did their usual ‘thorough’ investigation of corrupt Auburn boosters, attorny’s, athletes and witnesses and subsequently put Bama on probation. Well Bama said ‘Fu-k You!’ and subsequently filed the first ever collegiate lawsuit against the NZAA infractions division. When it was proven beyond all doubt that there was conspiracy and purgery within the ‘Auburn Family’ (Mafia), people were fired, fined and jailed and for the first time in history the NZAA was thwarted, embarrassed and forced to remove their probation. Now the NZAA was horrified. They feared the Bama uprising would spread like wildfire through the entire NCAA membership and they would lose control. They decided to nip it in the bud by making a example of the instigators – Alabama. From that day on Bama has squirmed under the NZAA magnifying glass. We can’t wiggle without a little Nazi bast–d putting a boot in our nuts. There’s no doubt that the 3 orange schools recieved absolution for similar sins by helping the Nazi’s nail Bama for Albert Means. Yet, even in the Means case Bama proved no direct University involvement. It was all propogated by rogue boosters. And today there are still lawsuits in progress over the systems improprieties in that case. In fact the NZAA never did prove their case themselves. The FBI had to prove it for them by doing an income tax evasion investigation of the $250,000 or so that was rumored to have changed hands. But that was good enough for the NZAA, and the penis envying rumor mongorers at the orange colored schools. So the truth of the current situation is that it all started with corruption at the Barn 15 years ago, and what goes around comes around, et al: Adios Fulmer and Tuberville – the best coaches in your histories and Hello Saban, Cheeze Dip and Lame Kitten! REVENGE! HOW SWEET IT IS! PAYBACK’S A BITCH ‘AINT IT! – LMFAO!!! RTR!

  15. 19
    BamaBrando

    The Auburn spin machine has always assumed if Bama is doing well, then they must be cheating. Little brother is always living in the shadow of big brother. Thats why it is easy for them to believe these things. They want Bama to be in trouble so bad, it almost takes their attention so much that they can’t enjoy following their own team.

  16. 20
    Auburn is a joke formerly the fan known as Ballplay Indian

    Good grief Egg………That was painful to read. You sound as fired up and misinformed as a liberal talking about waterboarding……..Brando, I dont believe that Alabama has to cheat to win. Im not under any pretenses that Saban has anything to do with any sort of cheating. In fact , I beleive if he had proof , he would turn them in himself. What I am saying, is that you guys have a recent and longstanding history of rouge boosters who pay players. Buy cars , etc. AND SO HAVE WE …….But not recently. If so , please show me.

    Egghead, ther only people that got bama in the cellar were the leaders calling the shots. Yeah , the scholly cuts hurt your depth a little. But,cmon man. Wake up. Nobody got bama in trouble but bama. No black helicopters, no conspirircy theories, just ignorant people running the show. If you think anything other than that you are hopeless. But what do I expect from the guy that claims to have invented the Tide box with crap paper on a stick …………

  17. 21
    E.G White

    In the immortal words of Omnipresent I quote: ‘Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha – – – breath – – – hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!’. LMFAO! RTR!

  18. 22
    julio

    EG, that paranoid conspiracy diatribe you just posted was more than a little bit scary…you really need to start taking your meds again.

  19. 23
    Auburn is a joke formerly the fan known as Ballplay Indian

    egghead WAS the shooter on the grassy knoll…….

  20. 26
    E.G White

    Hey Ballplay, you just may have hit on something! Maybe we ought to take all those nefarious rumor mongoring Barners and waterboard ’em to get at the truth? I’m a waterboarding fan. I’ll volunteer my services! RTR!

  21. 27
    OMNIPRESENT

    E.G it was a long Blog and one thing I have learned that Bad things happen to good people BUT NOT ALL THE TIME. If a dog scratches he usually has fleas…

    And just becuase I am a glutten for punishment You can waterboard me just so I can see what its like.

  22. 28
    Bamaman

    Ballplay, we do not believe Pat Dye paid Albert Means. . . .that would be Eric Ramsey, undisputed proof for your listening pleasure, I wonder who he will pay next?

  23. 29
    E.G White

    Julia, in case you haven’t checked the archives again, I left you an answer at ‘What The Presidents Said About Bear Bryant’. Go read it if you want to. I’m not going to repost it here. RTR!

  24. 30
    JW

    A GREAT MAN THE BEAR.When i was a 10 year old kid living in the projects on greymont ave selling line ups at LEGION FIELD.I was at the players entrance and the bear saw me trying to get a look at him and trying to sell/ he walked up to me and asked if i would like to roam side lines with him that day.That was a day this man will never forget the rest of his life as BAMA wore TENNESSEE a new azzz.

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