T he Never To Yield Foundation is right—all Alabama fans are rude and evil. We are sinners. It is too bad we can’t be model Christians like all those Auburn men and women. Christians like those men of the Auburn Creed on the football team who committed armed robbery (link); or like a coach’s wife who bitched out sports columnist and radio host Paul Finebaum (link); or like the Auburn fans who wanted Finebaum banned from campus because they disagreed with his opinion (link); or like Cecil Newton who shopped his son for cash (link) or Cam Newton who reportedly committed academic fraud at Florida; or all those Auburn men who cheated so often that Auburn has been on NCAA probation more than any other NCAA scofflaw except SMU and Arizona State (see the Cheating Hall of Fame).
Perhaps instead of being bad people, Alabama fans should emulate Auburn fans. You know, Auburn fans like those who threatened to beat Paul Finebaum and spat on him during his visit to the 2009 Iron Bowl. Alabama fans should emulate those Auburn fans that wanted to ban Finebaum from campus in an effort to squelch free speech and differing opinions. Ban different opinions? Sounds great for a university doesn’t it?
Thank God Auburn is here to model correct behavior for the rest of college football. I’m sure Jesus would run his athletic department the same way Auburn men like Pat Dye run things on the Plains.
Auburn is the perfect counterbalance against the Antichrist that is Nick Saban. Auburn’s lunatic fringe attributes all the bad behavior from the likes of Harvey Updyke to Alabama’s football coach.
Here is the difference between Alabama and Auburn—the Updykes are the fringe element of Alabama, but Auburn’s shame comes from football players, coaches wives and fanatics on the Internet that all must have attended Auburn since Auburn has no sidewalk fans.
The Never To Yield Foundation is the problem just as much as any myopic fan. These types of people condemn others while refusing to see their own family problems. In the view of the Auburn lunatic fringe, only Nick Saban and Alabama are evil. They believe Auburn’s poop doesn’t stink.
However, in the real world a balanced view is needed. There are good Alabama fans. There are good Auburn fans. There are despicable people who cheer for both universities.
Sane fans on both sides know it, but Auburn’s lunatic fringe is composed of hypocrites. Hypocrites who prefer to call names than deal with their own internal problems. Hypocrites who prefer to distract themselves from the train wreck that is Auburn recruiting 2012 by name calling.
Hypocrisy truly is what defines the Auburn lunatic fringe.
Or is it delusion?
Either way, nothing will help distract Auburn from the 2011 season, Alabama’s 14th national championship (the ninth of the poll era), and another superb recruiting class from Alabama coach Nick Saban. Enjoy your hypocrisy Never To Yield. It is all you have.