Jesus picks Clemson over Auburn

L ast year in a win over Clemson, Auburn football coach Gene Chizik told everyone that God was All In with the Auburn program—Chizik declared the victory A God Thing™. Today God wasn’t All In for Auburn. This time God picked Clemson to win.

How else do you explain a diving interception of Barrett Trotter by Coty Sensabaugh in the fourth quarter?

Or Auburn’s stout defense giving up over 600 yards of total offense?

Or the circus juggling catch by Clemson’s DeAndre Hopkins to convert on third down and keep the clock running?

Using Gene Chizik’s theology of football, we should ask why did God turn his back on Auburn? Was there some reason to smite the Tigers? Some sin like Achan’s before the defeat at Ai?

These are troubling questions.

What will God require to once again favor Auburn?

Should we place blame on the offense? After all, the offense scored fewer points on Clemson than the Wofford Terriers! Clemson defeated Wofford 35-27 and beat Auburn 38-24.

Or perhaps it is on the defense? It is hard to win when you surrender 38 points, 34 points and 38 points in consecutive weeks.

God, why hast thou forsaken Auburn?

Football fans and football theologians everywhere are wondering!

115 Responses to “Jesus picks Clemson over Auburn” Subscribe

  1. Barner September 17, 2011 at 2:28 pm #

    I thought Nick Saban was Jesus Christ? Nicko picked Clemson?
    Suck it Tyde. Now go watch your own team instead of OBSESSING over ours. We will deal with our own.

    • WhoreEagle September 17, 2011 at 2:47 pm #

      Barner…..I’m embarrassed for you. What kind of comment is that? You need to work on your “comebacks”, because that one was really, really, really, weak.

  2. finebammer September 17, 2011 at 3:03 pm #

    it isn’t Jesus but……..

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iqn-9n0X4ig

    auburn sux.

  3. Jason September 17, 2011 at 3:05 pm #

    This is a very disturbing blog for people of faith. I am removing this site from my bookmarks.

    • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 3:32 pm #

      I suppose we should just accept God picks some teams to win and others to lose without questioning the legitimacy of the assertion.

      • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 3:49 am #

        I hear that sportsinsiderguy.com is coming out with an expose that the Red Elephant Club bribed God.

    • CW September 17, 2011 at 4:08 pm #

      Jason, are you removing God from your bookmarks also for the disturbing loss today?

    • BamaBrando September 18, 2011 at 7:11 am #

      Don’t let the doorknob hit your ass on the way out. If you don’t understand the context of this post, then you might just be an Auburn fan.

  4. Crimsonite September 17, 2011 at 3:17 pm #

    Whoops deh it is! Whoops deh it is! Whoops deh it is! Bwaa haww haww! By the time McCarron and Simms and Hanks and Carter have 11 games under their belts it won’t surprise me if Bama puts 100 on the stupid Barnturds. That has to be the worst defense in the history of college football. Replacing starters is no excuse. Bama replaced 9 starters on defense last year and ended up the year ranked in the top 5 overall and better in some categories. If the Barnturds hadn’t snuck by 3\4 of their opponents last year, maybe they could have gotten some of those top 5 recruits a little experience. Apparently struggling to win a National Championship cost the little phuckers dearly. They may never recover. Who is their defensive coach again? Isn’t CheezeDick supposed to be some kind of defensive genius? Bwaa haww haww! Well they were ranked between 110 and 119 out of 120 in every defensive category last week. This week they’ll be 120 in everything. ROTFLMMFAO! RTR!

    • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 3:51 am #

      Saban will never let Bama beat Aub by 100. He wants to keep the Chiz where he is so he can thump Auburn on a yearly basis.

  5. Christy September 17, 2011 at 3:25 pm #

    Jesus picked Tuscaloosa over Auburn when he smashed it with a tornado.

    • BamaBrando September 17, 2011 at 3:34 pm #

      Won’t be rolling no trees at Harveys Corner today.

    • Cow College September 17, 2011 at 7:34 pm #

      You, Missy, are one sorry piece of $hit for posting such a comment. I’d love to chunk your a$$ up into the trees at Updyke corner and I hope you hit every damn limb on the way down. You’re a sack of $hit!!!

    • Denny Chimes September 17, 2011 at 7:43 pm #

      But wait, neither the University nor stadium received any damage. By your twisted barner logic, does that mean that God loves Bama football and Saban?

      Way to show the average barner class of gloating over dead victims of a tornado. Classy move there chica.

  6. Crimsonite September 17, 2011 at 3:27 pm #

    Jason it would probably be better if you do. This is 2011, and there’s really not much of a place for people who still belive in ancient superstions. Granted the Bible is an excellent map for how people should live together, but that’s all it is. If you belive in some omnipotent, all powerful, unable to do wrong being whose been around for 100 trillion years then you probably believe

  7. Crimsonite September 17, 2011 at 3:29 pm #

    Jason it would probably be better if you do. This is 2011, and there’s really not much of a place for people who still belive in ancient superstitions. Granted the Bible is an excellent road map for how people should live together, but that’s all it is. If you belive in some omnipotent, all powerful, unable to do wrong being, whose been around for 100 trillion years or so, then you probably believe in Santa Clause and the Easter Bunny too.

  8. Timberman Ed September 17, 2011 at 3:41 pm #

    Shane: First, I feel inclined to accuse you of hypocrisy. I’ve listened to you on Paul’s radio show every day, and you claim God’s blessings on your victory over cancer while laughing at Coach C for doing the same thing. Although I am glad you are doing well, and I am also a believer in divine intervention, I feel your claiming a victory but denying another their claim is the ultimate in hypocrisy.

    I can’t believe that Paul hasn’t seen this and said something about it. It only shows that blood is thicker than water. His lack of seeing past this is proof of (1) his favoritism of you and propping up of your career and (2) his hypocrisy by not calling you out on it, also.

    Gene Chizik has as much right to claim a miracle intervention by a higher authority as you do. How would you feel if Coach Chizik said “Oh, Shane is alive today because of some doctor, a lot of money, and Blue Cross – Blue Shield. God had nothing to do with it’?. I suspect you would have an issue with that.

    The only difference between you & him is that he has more class than to try to deny you your miracle.

    Hypocrite. Cancel my subscription, if I have one.

    God Bless you, and continue to claim God’s blessings. But I hope one day you can find it in your heart to allow God to bless someone you don’t like.

    • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 3:48 pm #

      Timberman Ed, I’m not Shane. He has his own website these days.

      Anyway, there is a big difference in thinking God is involved in lives and making a difference and thinking God picks a team to win or lose.

      Why should God favor the Christians at Auburn over the Christians at Clemson?

      See—this is the basic problem I have with the way Auburn and Chizik presented God.

      God cares about each and everyone of us. He has a plan. However, I doubt his plan involves smiting some teams and helping other football teams to victory.

      • Scott September 17, 2011 at 4:11 pm #

        Who said God is favoring Auburn over Clemson?

        • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 4:14 pm #

          You do remember last year’s interview with Chizik don’t you?

          • Scott September 17, 2011 at 6:11 pm #

            I do remember, but he never said anything about God favoring Auburn over Clemson.

          • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 6:17 pm #

            God Thing. Keep the Faith.

            It is clear what he was saying…God picks side in football.

            Remember what he said after the BCS game? God was with us.

            Good grief. Yeah, it is clear what that guy thinks.

          • Denny Chimes September 17, 2011 at 7:47 pm #

            Cap, these barners have short memories. It’s right here in this article…at the very beginning and then quoted again another time later in the article:
            http://www.al.com/sports/index.ssf/2010/09/auburn_game_story_pivotal_thir.html

            I’m not surprised your point went sailing above their trailer park heads. I am surprised though by how many barners have their nerve to show their face here.

    • CW September 17, 2011 at 4:12 pm #

      Ed, if you going to use God for victories, you have to use God for the losses also. You people like to think of yourself as God’s team. All the while, you cheat with hooks and blow for recruits,P4P, and gambling cheap mortgage loans for recruits famblies. If you going to talk the talk, then be prepared to take crap like this.

    • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 3:57 am #

      Ed.
      psst.. psst. Do you know what a cult is?

      • BamaBrando September 18, 2011 at 7:13 am #

        Ed is a card carrying member.

  9. bamabino September 17, 2011 at 3:47 pm #

    Tuberville’s senior class + a 200K QB= 1 tainted NC for the NCAA to vacate.LMAO

    3 straight Jizzdrool top 5 recruiting classes = 38 points and 600 yards allowed per game.LMAO

    Clemson offense plays keep away for the final 9:34 of the game.LMAO

    Stud Dyer gets 5 touches the entire 2nd half. LMAO

    Gus the Bust calls a play action pass on 3rd and 2 with Dyer off the field.Punt Auburn Punt.LMAO

    Barntard U. has never been anything but Bama wannabee’s.And they’ve failed miserably. LMAO

    • DAMAGE INC. September 18, 2011 at 10:21 am #

      3 straight top 5 recruiting classes = well, we’re young ya know? <———— Aubarn lame excuse.

      Great coaching ;-)

      Break out dem Troopah towelz you mo's.

  10. bamabino September 17, 2011 at 3:51 pm #

    Dumbass barntard punt returner fields punt in endzone.Must be a sociology major.LMAO

  11. Kristen September 17, 2011 at 3:53 pm #

    Tornado comment completely inappriorate and hurtful. I pray for someone who mocks the death and destruction of April 27th. You should be ashamed….

    • Christy September 17, 2011 at 4:09 pm #

      I guess you can overlook the blog.

      • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 4:12 pm #

        I guess you can’t see how claiming God favors one set of Christians in a football game over another set of Christians is absurd.

        • CW September 17, 2011 at 4:14 pm #

          The sad thing is that *U people don’t see this as hypocrisy. They honestly think they are clean living, white Christian folks. That’s how they sell their school for the OTM kids anyway. They deny it. But, I know better.

        • Christy September 17, 2011 at 6:10 pm #

          nobody is claming God’s favor for one set of Christians.

      • BamaBrando September 18, 2011 at 7:15 am #

        But we can overlook a stupid b!tch like you. Now shoo, get on out of here.

  12. Barner September 17, 2011 at 4:46 pm #

    You idiots honestly think you know what or how we think.
    Bammers are jihadists with mullets.
    This is simply another example of bammer ideology. Updyke’s corner? Really? You mean like Muhamed ‘s World Trade Center Towers?
    Doesn’t that just piss you off? Keep saying it so the world can see.

    • BamaBrando September 18, 2011 at 7:16 am #

      Well, the limbs of the trees at Harveys corner are bare tonight… which will be dead first, the twees or Auburns season?

  13. bamagrad September 17, 2011 at 6:26 pm #

    I’m not a fan of this type of writing. I would hope someone that is a Christian wouldn’t write something like this. It is disgusting to me to use Jesus’ name in this manner.

    • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 6:34 pm #

      Then I guess you got the point. It is disgusting when Gene Chizik or any football coach claims that God is on their side.

      • bamagrad September 17, 2011 at 6:42 pm #

        As a Christian, I have no problem with what Chizik has said. Are you a Christian capstonereport?

        • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 6:59 pm #

          Yes. And I take it seriously. Hence, why I find it objectionable. What he said wasn’t the simple athlete praising God–it was equating victory with God picking Auburn. It sounded very similar to the nonsense name-it-and-claim-it theology that is so popular now.

        • bamagrad September 17, 2011 at 7:22 pm #

          You come across to me as someone who has a lot of hate in his heart. You and I don’t know Chizik and what he meant by what he said and I think it is wrong to assume judge him by a comment. I hope to not read garbage like this again from your site. I pray that you have a change of heart and decide to write positive articles about your enemies.

          • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 7:33 pm #

            I will judge the wisdom and theological soundness of anyone who espouses a strange new doctrine.

            Christians are commanded to earnestly contend for the faith…right?

          • Denny Chimes September 17, 2011 at 7:49 pm #

            1 John 4:1
            Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.

        • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 4:07 am #

          Grad.
          I have a huge problem with what Chizik has said. He tries to portray the moral superior wholesome godly image, knowing damn good and well half his team is paid for. Knowing that Auburn broke more rules than a juvenile deliquent lockup on steriods. He has no shame. And if there is a judgement day Gene Chizik will need Marshal Goldberg and the entire Birmingham news war room to spin this one into a favorable light.

  14. Barner September 17, 2011 at 7:13 pm #

    You call yourself a Christian running this Updyke nest? And you call Chizik a hypocrite?

    • capstonereport September 17, 2011 at 7:18 pm #

      Nice. Resort to name calling people who hold different opinions. Typical Auburn mentality. That is why in a Christian-like manner you guys are trying to ban Finebaum from campus.

      Honestly, it is pathetic, and such activities have no place being associated with a college or college football.

      • barner September 18, 2011 at 2:08 am #

        just for the sake of conversation, i do understand your point here, although i think most athletes and fans support this type of belief structure, even your own fan base. As you have seen here, they see your attack as an attack on a belief system, which they likely share.
        as for your point:
        “Why do they think God likes them more than God likes us?” well… that argument is as old as time and each side will forever claim it.
        But. This is dangerous fodder for a college football blog that represents an institution of the faithful. and lets face it, yours is nothing short of fanatic (i would say lunatic, but i am biased). those “faithful” will always apply their belief structure to every facet of their life, as ours do, and there is nothing wrong with that.
        in summary, i have issues with politicians mixing god talk and fiscal responsibility, also i have ‘slight’ issues with atheletes and rap/pop stars thanking jesus for their music, guns, and money.
        But i accept it as part of the game. As it is.

    • BamaBrando September 17, 2011 at 9:24 pm #

      Your feelings are going to get hurt a lot this year. No one will pity you or the trees.

      • barner September 18, 2011 at 2:42 am #

        you guys will reap the “poisoning of the trees” for as old as the trees have lived.

        • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 4:13 am #

          And you guys will reap the “paying of the players”, for as long as the NCAA can slam you.
          Welcome to Lee County. Make sure you taken your stolen laptops to the IT building for a quick scrub down.

        • BamaBrando September 18, 2011 at 7:22 am #

          Now, is that a threat? Haha! Now the trees are going to have something to do with winning the games! Tree worshipping is very cult like also, don’t you think?

          • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:06 am #

            karma come for u.
            karma come soon

          • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 8:05 am #

            Karma? Is that another cult worshipping threat? Dude, put down the voodoo dolls and stop making blod sacrifices. Auburn is still going to suck this year.

    • almightytmc1 September 18, 2011 at 4:10 am #

      Barner you call yourself a man with 3 working brain cells?
      Get your cerebral cortex checked.

  15. Hoopie September 18, 2011 at 8:24 am #

    If you would like, we can spend some time together wherein I can show you some scripture to help you understand. Christians believe that God delivers all blessings. Christians also believe that when challenges arrive before us, we should seek guidance in God’s word to handle the challenge. Christians give God the credit for blessings. While handling a challenge may not always be verbalized by Christians as a “God Thing”, it should be considered such.

    I suspect that Jason has removed your site because He knows that God never turns his back on anyone …..and you have insinuated that he did. People turn their back on God.

    God doesn’t let one team win at the expense of another. God answers prayers as he sees fit. Just because Chizik gives credit to God doesn’t mean that God has played favorites. It means that Chizik felt blessed and expressed such. We cannot know the mind of God. Christains trust, through faith, that God’s will is supreme and right.

    Using your logic, then you should be up in arms every time a player Mark Ingram points to the sky after scoring a TD. Using your logic, if Ingram gives credit to God, then God favored him over the defender that missed the tackle.

    If you aren’t the hypocrite that you’ve proven yourself to be numerous times, you will start calling out every Bama player that points to the sky to give God credit.

    • capstonereport September 18, 2011 at 8:32 am #

      No Hoopie, you are missing the point.

      The problem isn’t praising God for his blessings.

      The problem was in Chizkik’s statement that insinuated God was on one team’s side.

      That is the problem.

      BTW, I’m not a hypocrite. I even defended Rev. Chette Williams when other Alabama fans attacked him. It is in the site’s archives still I’m sure. I have no problem with religious displays and see a net benefit in religious actions being linked to the rest of a person’s actions.

      However, everyone knows what Chizik said…if they are honest with themselves…and they know it to be wrong. Hence, why I wrote my column highlighting the absurdity of his original claim.

      • Hoopie September 19, 2011 at 9:56 am #

        Go read Chizik’s book. Chizik wasn’t saying that God “gave” the victory to Auburn. His “God thing” comment, however awkward, had to do with Gene’s and the teams personal journey in faith.

        • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 9:59 am #

          And his “God was with us” comment after the Oregon game?

  16. Crimsonite September 18, 2011 at 10:33 am #

    Aww for CHRIST’S sake can we get off the God thing! This is a sports blog and it’s football season. I know you Barnturds as of today have nothing else to talk about but do it anyway. Make up some fantastric excuses for the worst defense since Slippery Rock U. or something. But while we’re on the subject did ya’ll catch Bama Man Dabo Sweeny’s tongue in cheek stab at CheezeDick after the game? It went something like “Give the glory to God for this victory”. Bwaa haww haww! Do ya’ll know how rediculous you all sound by debating the fantasy that there even exists an omnipotent trillion year old entity, much less that it would ever on the coldest day in Hell, give a flying phuck about a football game on this insignificant planet? Bwaa haww haww!!!! Take your religion to your church. Leave college football alone! Ooops, the Devil made me do it! Bwaa haww haww! RTR!

    • barner September 20, 2011 at 12:14 am #

      wow

  17. DES September 18, 2011 at 11:32 am #

    Awww Jason you will be back. But not as Jason. But some other stupid Lee County handle.RTR!!!

  18. Boycott the ad sponser's September 18, 2011 at 12:31 pm #

    I guess the trash in Alabama can’t hate African-Americans any more so they hate their neighbor.

    You idiots deserve to live in alabama….

    • barner September 20, 2011 at 12:16 am #

      yankee, we will take turns making you squeal like a pig.
      come on down!!!

  19. bamabino September 18, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

    Try a little well deserved, good natured ribbing over at al.com. Your post will disappear faster than Cam Newton at class time. What a joke barnies are.

  20. Crimsonite September 18, 2011 at 2:47 pm #

    Oh, you didn’t know that? You can’t even say Raw Beagle over there, even on the Bama section. And on their Rivals sites they don’t just delete it, they ban you and or blacklist you. Fascists. At LSU they do the same thing for saying LSWho. God help you if you say Corndogs. They send out the Coonazz hit squad. You alien troll shytheads don’t know how lucky you are that Bama has a First Amendment blog where you can be as retared as you want. RTR!

  21. DES September 18, 2011 at 3:05 pm #

    Jason- Back now as boycod ?

  22. FYI September 18, 2011 at 9:19 pm #

    It still blows my mind that you Bama fans are critical of Chizik for praising God. Hoopie couldn’t have said it better. It’s time to let it goes fellas.

    • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 8:11 am #

      Coming from another Cult member like you, that really means a lot. Look, Auburn was mocking religion with Aubie dressing in preacher robes last year, and y’all get all mad when Bama plays ‘Son of a Preacher Man’. Chizik implies God was the reason Auburn was so lucky to win last season, and you guys all get behind that and act like the religious beliefs of the Auburn cult were behind the success. So, I guess it is safe to say God was with Clemson saturday, and that God was responsible for that beat down you took.

  23. BigDaddy September 18, 2011 at 9:40 pm #

    Either God is sovereign or he isn’t… Bible says he is, so if you believe as the Bible reads then yeah Jesus picked Clemson to win the game this year. It would be self righteous for any of us to think we could fully understand the purposes and ways of the almighty!

    I’m sure you still don’t understand why he had Auburn spot you 24 and come back and beat on your team like they were playing their little sisters…

    • capstonereport September 18, 2011 at 9:58 pm #

      So, if God is sovereign, then everything that happens is his will? Therefore, when people are murdered it is all part of his will? Does that hold for child molestation? Genocide?

      I guess that means he really does pick some to go to heaven and some to go to hell? Do we apply TULIP here?

      Is this Auburn’s football theology? Calvinism Saturdays.

      • Hoopie September 19, 2011 at 10:02 am #

        CR ..I’m sure that you know that God is sovereign, he allows free will. Folks make choices based on faith …or lack of it.

        When and how much God directly intervenes in lives is not something that can be known. A Christian asks for guidance, wisdom and sometimes particular requests and trusts that God will provide. Many times what God provides is not what the Christian envisioned when he asked…it is up to the Christian to discern God’s will in what has been provided, trust that it is right and proceed to go do God’s will.

        • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 10:36 am #

          So this means Auburn can go to hell.

  24. RC September 18, 2011 at 10:36 pm #

    Auburn people are all Christians until it’s time to cross the ghettos of Birmingham to Elmwood Cemetery to make the annual Auburn pilgrimage to piss on his grave and leave Auburn stickers on his headstone. Not to mention the time they rolled Toomers Corner when he died, and YES THAT DID HAPPEN you phony, hypocritical, OLD SOUTH backwards inbred Auburn University hicks. I love how you imbeciles went on al.com after the tree poisonings and said, it didn’t happen and all claimed to have been there. RIIIIight, let’s believe the fanbase that tapes jerseys to statues, plants rye grass at the opponents stadium, pisses and shits on a rival coaches headstone, pays QB’s, and has been on probation more times than a professional whore. I fuckin hate Auburn University and their fake ass pretend-to-be Christian, false prophet fanbase. I DARE any of you Auburn M. F.’s to have that skeleton dressed as Bear this year at the Iron Bowl. It better not happen, and there will be consequences if it does

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:12 am #

      you sir, are retarded

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:18 am #

      coming for u

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:23 am #

      pretty tornadoes

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:28 am #

      its a god thing

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:30 am #

      oh, and we dont care if cam got paid or not.
      prove it or stfu.
      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:32 am #

      i want to see your “consequences”

    • barner September 19, 2011 at 12:57 am #

      oh, and we will have a skeleton dressed as a homo bear.
      look it up if you dont get it…
      (bears are good gay fucks)

    • Hoopie September 19, 2011 at 10:06 am #

      Like all fan bases Auburn does have a few idiots. I bet that like so many of the Bama idiots on here

      I was there. It didn’t happen.

      • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 10:33 am #

        Auburn has desecrated all of Bamas legends and traditions over the years. I know, for a fact, that Auburn fans have regularly vandalized Bear Bryants gravesite. The tasteless skelton with a houndstooth hat on is really a pretty old one. The lies about Bear cheated and the Auburn propaganda about how Bamas championships never happened has been around for several generations of Auburn cultists now. And all this is just not ‘a few idiots’. It is a large portion of the Auburn fan base and the administration at Auburn that has held this intense hatred for Bama for decades now. Now, the hatred from the Bama side is finally catching up to Auburns level. Auburn is now the number one rival to Bama. Sorry, but the UT rivalry, Florida rivalry and recently the rivalry with LSU has been the more important rivalry to most Bama fans than the Auburn game. But not this year.

      • RC September 19, 2011 at 4:08 pm #

        ONCE AGAIN, ANOTHER LYING ASS AUBURN FAN WHO CLAIMS TO HAVE BEEN THERE

  25. barner September 19, 2011 at 12:15 am #

    perfect example of jihadist with mullet.
    we find u.
    karma come soon

    • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 8:14 am #

      Ass-Whoopin Day is coming 11-26. Barnergeddon is upon you.

      • barner September 20, 2011 at 12:20 am #

        ooooh, we skeered

      • barner September 20, 2011 at 12:23 am #

        FYI, we dont hate your football team…
        we hate u
        karma come soon

        • BamaBrando September 20, 2011 at 6:29 am #

          nice try, cult freak. Karma is coming for your team this season, didn’t you know?

  26. Crimsonite September 19, 2011 at 5:18 am #

    This phucking “barner” in the last 6 or 8 posts is a retarded butt pumper. But then most of them who come here are. Did I read right? Did one of these pieces of shyt motherphuckers above actually compare UpDyke’s tree poisoning to the 9\11 bombings? Phucking Barnturds. What a waste of good Oxygen. RTR!

  27. BigDaddy September 19, 2011 at 5:43 am #

    Capstone:

    TULIP is the only way I see to logically interpret the Bible, so the answer is undoubtedly yes – his hand is in all of those horrible atrocities. His ways are too great and wondrous for me – so while I personally don’t understand his reason, I know through faith that his plan is ultimately for good and it is not my place to question, but rather to submit. Something I sinfully resist all of
    the time! (as does Coach Chizik, Coach Saban, yourself…)

    The next logical question someone would ask is how one could view God as good after all of the suffering he allows (such as having Auburn spot you 24 like playing our little sister and then administering the nationally televised buttwhoopimg). The only way to know God is through Jesus and what he did for us on the cross. In fact, it’s clear that without this one would turn out judging God, Auburn, everyone that doesn’t agree Alabama is the most badass football team ever as evil. It is definitely upside down for me or you to judge the almighty in any way since he is God and we are not. In light of bama’s low estate it would seem especially stupid for you guys to judge anything! (jk)

    So yeah – I’m comfortable with God’s role in football Saturdays at Auburn. I’m comfortable with his involvment with football at Bama and everywhere else too.

    War Eagle and God bless you!

    • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 9:36 am #

      I’ll admit I subscribe to some of TULIP.

      I believe in Unconditional Election.
      I believe in Perseverance of the Saints.

      I don’t find any Biblical support for Irresistible grace.
      I find Limited Atonement to be against Scripture.

      I’m unsure on Total depravity. Yes, there is scripture that details man’s evil nature. I freely admit that man sucks…if you will pardon the vernacular. The question is whether man is totally evil or not.This has great importance in soteriology. If man is totally sinful, then that bad tree won’t bear good fruit–and thus, the only logical conclusion is Calvin’s Irresistible grace–something that is outside what I consider plainly established doctrine and clear Scripture. Thus, I have to judge depravity based on what I understand of other Scripture and say I’m unsure or tending away from total depravity…..

      How is that for straddling the fence? :)

  28. BigDaddy September 19, 2011 at 6:20 am #

    Capstone:

    I missed some of your earlier comments about God favoring Auburn Christians over Bama Christians. If any Auburn fan tries to tell you they have special placement with the almighty because of the outcome of a football game, their circumstances at work, their health/wealth then you are correct to call them out on that. Those things are not indicative of God’s love for any of us – even tough all are intended to work together to help us to know him better.

    I don’t understand why you hear someone say ‘it’s a God thing’ and immediately jump to the assumption that it would mean God loves them more! From reading the Bible – being on God’s preferred list is a tough place to be – Israel’s suffering, David’s numerous challenges, Job, Jesus himself. God’s work just with these vessels intended for special use have helped all of us to know him better, but all sufferred great hardship so we would all see God’s glory. None of us would understand God’s love for any of them if we just looked at any of their circumstances at a single point in time. (God still loves Auburn even though we lost and God loves Bama even though he had Auburn nationally embarass you last year)

    I know this is a football site so I’ll tone down te theology discussion and get back to why we are all really here – Bama sucks!!!

    War Eagle!!! (and God bless you)

    • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 9:02 am #

      Actually, every so often we do begin a theological debate. I think it can be informational to people.

      It was more than just one remark from Chizik. It was his entire series of comments that structured a setup where God favored his team over his rivals because of their faith.

      Several newspapers jumped on it both after Clemson and the Oregon game.

      I have always believed God cares about his people. Every thing that matters to us would by nature matter to him just as a father cares about the small concerns of his children. The discomfort I had was linking divine favor to success on the football field in such a way as to pit God’s favor against every other person on the field.

      It just gave me heartburn.

      Why? Because I think too many people actually believe that type of stuff.

  29. capstonereportsucks September 19, 2011 at 7:10 am #

    You know that if you tone back the Bible bashing and stop posting about Auburn 70% of the time and stick to what you claim to be an expert on You might get this POS site off the ground. This site CLAIMS to be the be all end all on Alabama Sports, But they spend majority of their time obsessing over Auburn. ITK and CSR claim to have a top notch site that has endless amounts of visitors.(Excuse #1 : they come here but just dont post) Well heres the truth on this site. I did some research on capstonereport.com and the truth may shock you bama faithfull. Did you know that capstonereport ranks in at 148,534 in the alexa rankings!? Alexa rankings give you an idea on number of visitors a site has daily, weekly, even monthly. (alexa.com) Thats a far shot from REAL sports sites ESPN (#68), Rivals (#1402), And Scout (#1926). Hell even pornsites murder this onel Slutload.com ranks in at # 481 !!!! Sportsbybrooks.com even kicks Capstonereport.coms ass as it ranks at 45,569! Now wheres all of the visitors that you said you had Cappy / ITK? This site is so popular did you know that according to another site Capsstonereport.com has a POTENTIAL of earning $3,949 a year! That averages out to be $75.94 a week! At this rate ITK will pay his mobile home off by the year 2136! Then to top it all off they have a “Query Popularity” ranking which ranks how often people search your name.( For example google) Capstonereport.com ranks an amazing 5 on a scale 0 – 100!!! So not only are people not coming to this site , But they dont even know who the hell capstonereport.com is. Now dont let me get in the way of your Bible bashing. Please continue with your daily obsession.

    • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 8:18 am #

      This site does well with all the Auburn retards coming here to run their mouth. But, as we all know, in the grand scheme of things, Auburn really doesn’t have that many fans. And after Saturday, a lot of them took down their flags, folded them up, put the Cam jerseys away, and jumped straight off the band wagon to hibernate for another fifty years.

    • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 8:55 am #

      Your research is as bad as Chizik’s theology.

      Everyone in publishing knows Alexa’s rankings are suspect. However, I will suggest you try Quantcast if you want real metrics. You might be shocked the typical reader makes over $50,000 per year and we are running over 60,000 unique visitors per month.

      As for anything else, well that is going to remain private. However, if you weren’t worried about the site….you wouldn’t be here.

  30. Crimsonite September 19, 2011 at 9:18 am #

    Hey “Shyt For Brains”, you’re here, so what’s your point? Oh, that’s right, your a phucking Barnturd retard so there is no point. Damn, you must love CR to go to all that research trouble and then come on this “low hit” site and type in. I know that’s just what I do! Every day I go straight to every Barnturd site on the internet and report the stats for them! Bwaa haww haww. But the reality is, who gives a shyt how much someones site brings in. Nobody’s trying to raise a family off a sports blog. It’s a place for fun, and any money it brings in is just a stipen to the owners main source of income. $4000 a year. Hmmm. That’s good for a 3D Plasma TV and no payments. I’ll take it. How many Plasma TV’s do you have Barnturd azzhole? As for you hopeless idiots who think you have to be a mindless puppydog and accept all the shyt that happens on this world as the will of God because he has an unquestionable master plan – well good for you. You get the Kewpi Doll prize for being the best of the best mindless sheep.

  31. DES September 19, 2011 at 10:49 am #

    After reading some of the above, now I know I was right about the Auburn fans. They really suck !!!@ it.

  32. capstonereportsucks September 19, 2011 at 11:10 am #

    Way to throw out useless numbers cappy! Why dont you explain them to your followers? Lord knows crimsonshyte needs a little help. 60,000 visitors huh? So lets do the math. Lets use crimsonshyte for example since he’s here. Crimsonshyte visits csr what 3-4 times per hour on average? On days he doesnt have money for meth and actually gets some sleep hes awake 14-18 hours?thats 72 so called “visits” from just one gump in one day. So looking at it monthly good ol crimsonshyte accounts for over 2000 “visits”? Now dont go selling you get 60,000 new readers each month. Crimsonshyte and other turds may fall for that but dont be silly. 60,000 new readers a month for what …6 years and you can only get 10-15 people to post on this pos site?

    Now as far as crimsonshyte’s post… Well since you want to do inventory of my home ill help you out. We own 5 LED TV’s. Sorry but Plasma cant touch the overall performance and lifespan of LED.Maybe if you quit spending all of your welfare check on those mexican whores you brag about you could afford a few yourself. As far as your question “who gives a shyt how much someones site brings in” well it looks like your mentaly retarded ass does. If you dont why even respond to my post about it?

    • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 11:12 am #

      No idiot. I said unique visitors not pageviews.

      Pageviews are what really count in CPM though :)

    • capstonereport September 19, 2011 at 11:15 am #

      BTW, I never claimed to have a good site.

      And I never claimed to have that many “new” visitors. I said uniques monthly.

      It is clear you have no knowledge of the publishing industry or the online world.

  33. BigDaddy September 19, 2011 at 12:19 pm #

    Capstone:

    I find it to be very healthy that you have done a great deal of studying and seek God so actively. I want you to find God in whatever way he seeks you – and it sounds as if you already have a growing relationship I am sure will continue to be enriched.(through football and more direct life impacts)

    If you ever want to discuss TULIP in more detail feel free to email me if you have it. One of the issues I find with the Bible is that folks try to interpret it like an instruction manual or rule book as opposed to what it is – a statement of truth that God loves us and wants our hearts for him.

    TULIP treats the Bible as a statement of truth, and if you are interested at all in seeing scriptural references for it look up the Westminster Catachism.

    Good luck to you guys and God bless.

  34. Roll Tide September 19, 2011 at 1:38 pm #

    Just think if Cam had returned for his senior year-

    *Another Heisman

    *Another shot at a National Championship

    -and-

    *A Degree (what was his major?)

    But he went Pro because “the money was too much.”

  35. Roll Tide September 19, 2011 at 3:32 pm #

    A breather for the A-barn defense next week-

    Florida Atlantic has gained 194 yards in two games.

    An average of 97 yards per game.

    • BamaBrando September 19, 2011 at 5:56 pm #

      I bet Florida Atlantic has their season high yardage total on Saturday. They will have 200+ yards at least.

  36. Bama-Rolls September 19, 2011 at 3:50 pm #

    WDE= Worst Defense Ever..suck it barn!!

  37. Crimsonite September 19, 2011 at 8:47 pm #

    LED tv’s, how novel. Shortly they’ll be selling for $1.98 with a years supply of free batteries just like their counterpart watches did 25 years ago! Bwaa haww haww! LED’s have very limited life span. Hope you bought those tv’s cheap at K-Mart, cause you’re gonna be really pissed when the black holes start popping up on the screens! Bwaa Haww Haww! Another dumbazz who believes everything a preprogramed and poorly educated electronics salesman tells him! Bwaa haww haww! And by the way dumbazz, Cappy thanks you for all the hits you’ve given him today while you were over here telling him how the site you love to visit sucks so bad. Bwaa haww haww! Phucking dumbazz Barners! You may as well get use to being on this site and bugging us cause your team sucks so bad there isn’t going to be even the most remote resembalance to a football game in Auburn this year! Bwaa haww haww! As for me numbnuts, I’m on here maybe 15 to 20 times in a day when you bastards really piss me off and not on here at all 90% of the time.

  38. bamabino September 19, 2011 at 10:08 pm #

    Barners stoop to new low. Bama porcelain to pee on.

    http://thetideandtiger.blogspot.com/2011/09/bigblueaubs-new-favorite-restaurant.html

    They can squeeze it,
    They can shake it,
    They can bang it on the wall,
    But til it goes back in their pants,
    That last genetically mutated drop won’t fall.

  39. RC September 20, 2011 at 11:50 am #

    Barner,

    it’s already been established that Chizik phuckex a pig before the Arkansas game last year in front of the team then reached his thumb around and poked the pig in the eye. When Chizik asked his team who was next, Cam reportedly said, “OK, coach, but if you poke me in the eye, I’m going to kick your ass.”

  40. ITK September 20, 2011 at 11:51 am #

    This article has one of the funniest headlines I’ve ever read. Good work Cappy.

  41. DES September 20, 2011 at 3:13 pm #

    @ RC- Best one of the day. By the way, didn’t the German soldier of ww2 have something on their belt buckles like ” Gott mit uns (sp?) Didn’t do them much good in the end either.

%d bloggers like this: