Auburn delusion at an all-time high

How do you recognize an opponent racked with fear? When the object of that fear shows the first sign of vulnerability and elation erupts.

In this case, when the University of Alabama’s first chink in the armor in the last 3 seasons showed against a common opponent last Saturday, pandemonium spread far and wide among the Aubies.

I knew they were bothered by our success, which included our 22nd SEC Championship and 13th National Title, but never did I imagine that it shook them to their core. And the response? Orgasmic jubilee.

Personally, I’m enjoying it.

I witnessed two ladies in their fifties hugging, one saying to the other “I’m so happy!”

In a public forum before a performance, I heard a person offer “condolences to our Alabama fans in attendance”…classless but typical.

My personal favorite, I had an associate tell me “It’s over!”

It thrills me to think they’ve been hunkered down in their orange and blue storm shelters for three years trying to weather the storm. It thrills me even more that they think the storm is over.

Abarn has long enjoyed the most delusional, smoke-and-mirrors fan base of all time. The smallest achievement is magnified fifty times in convincing fashion.

We saw it last season in living color when “We led ya’ll for 58 minutes!” I admit I struggled to manufacture a response because never had I heard something so pathetic.

Now Navid Nousel is no doubt donning a cape with an interlocking AU on it, screaming in his den “We’re coming for ya Bamur!”

Navid Nousel left reality behind a long time ago, but then again, he’s not alone. Reality has never been a member of the Ahbuhn Fambly.

Reality: The Tiggers defeated USCe in the friendly confines of their stadium.
Aubie delusion: A quality win nonetheless, but not quite the same as the defending National Champions and current No. 1 team taking a 19-game winning streak into Columbia, South Carolina, wearing the target on their backs with a GameDay-hyped crowd in a frenzy and a team that, according to Steve Spurrier, played at an all-time high (in school history).

Reality: Halfway through the season, Abarn is 6-0.
Aubie delusion: That means something. They’ve defeated one team in the top 25. In their house. Other games? Allow me…

Five wins against unranked opponents:

Arkansas State at home – (2-4) whose highlight this season is beating North Texas.
Missy State – (4-2) whose highlight is defeating the 2010 version of Georgia…but also Alcorn State and Memphis!
Clempson at home (2-3) – currently on a three game skid, including a loss to gutted North Carolina (but did beat Presbyterian handily!)
Louisiana-Monroe – (2-3) – with losses to Arkansas State, but did edge SE Louisiana by 1.
Kentucky – (3-3) – who was flying high till they entered conference play (0-3). Wins over Akron and Western Kentucky were awesome though!

And to boot, Missy State, Clempson, and Kentucky were all nail biters that came down to the wire, as did USCe. Clempson had to give the game away. Missy dropped a clutch, uncontested pass late in the contest. Kentucky racked up 34 on the vaunted AU D.

Meanwhile, across the state…

Alabama has competed against and defeated 3 out of 4 ranked teams, two in the top 10 and one on the road. Unfortunately their road games haven’t come against impotent Missy State or Kentucky, but instead against #12 Arkansas and #19 USCe.

Admittedly, Alabama faltered in a horrific performance against an inspired and energized USCe on the road last Saturday, the first of six straight opponents who enjoy a week off prior to their “jewel” game of their season. And yet, despite the set of information I just handed you, we get this from our Aubie delusion brokers:

“Here’s the truth and you know it…AU is foaming at the mouth to get to Nov. 26th. Last year, AU took the best team bama will have in the next 50 years to the wire (notice the pitiful two-handed grasp on last year’s moral victory) with an average (at best) qb and medivac unit for a defense that didn’t substitute its linebackers a single play. You think we’re scared now now with Cam Newton and a D that can actually shuffle some players?? No, the truth is that every one of you bammers are nervous as hell about that game. Bama will lose to LSU and AU and finish the season 9-3.”

So Cam unleashes the fury against five unranked opponents and the AU defense is giving away points like its candy, and now Black Friday is a given. In our house. Where we haven’t so much as given up a touchdown this season. Let alone haven’t lost there since 2007.

Do you see why we love Abarn fans? They’re like cute little Chihuahuas running around the house. They bark like crazy, but can’t really do that much to you. Oh, and they’re fun to kick.

And with the second half of the season coming, it’s going to be more fun than ever!

113 Comments

Add Yours
  1. 2
    Drew

    I love how Bama fans try and make their loss less than what it actually is. Your wins over Penn State and Florida mean nothing now. They mean just as much as our wins over Clemson and Missy. And I don’t know what you try to accomplish by using different variations of our name, but it doesn’t bother us. And Clemson doesn’t have a “p” in it. Oh, and this article had a whole lot less class than what those fans were saying about y’all. If I was a Bama fan reading this I’d be embarrassed. No double standard though, I’ve been embarrasses by Auburn articles too. Nice job trying to play down your loss by 14 points to a team that we beat by 8. We will see y’all November 26th, no matter what either teams ranking is. Then and only then will a team have bragging rights over the other team. Once again, good try on trying to downplay your loss. But a loss is a loss, and a win is a win. No matter against who or by how many points. Especially in the SEC.
    War Eagle

  2. 3
    julio

    Nothing could possibly give me more satisfaction than knowing that a simple post I made gigging ITK enraged him to write an entire article in response.
    BTW ITK if you’re gonna quote my post, include the entire thing. The part about Bama going the Outback Bowl was noticeably absent. Remember bammers, you can’t spell “Outback” without a U and an A.

  3. 4
    ITK

    And nothing gives me greater pleasure than you thinking you did anything of the sort! 🙂

    I knew you were scared all this time, but thank you for bringing your fear into the light.

    Quick, tell me how your 250 lb. QB destroyed La.Monroe! Or how your awesome D held Kentucky under 35.

  4. 5
    ITK

    Oh, and Drew? FYI, the game on November 26th will be on CBS. I’ll be in Bryant-Denny watching the Tide hand you #3.

    Please watch as long as you can stand it…your little hopes getting dashed in front of 101,000+.

  5. 7
    julio

    “Now bark, little Chihuahuas, bark!”

    I guess that’s ITK’s “jedi mind trick” to convince us AU fans that we will look bad if we say anything in response. That would be a very effective strategy …if you were trying to use it on Erkel from the show Family Matters.

    Make sure to check out the Florida Aquarium when you’re in Tampa, ITK.

  6. 9
    Bama Fan in NYC

    Aubarn’s only quality win this year was against South Carolina, despite the fact that Spurrier’s true freshman QB handed them that one.

    Other than that, luck got them by Mississippi State and Clemson. Kentucky was legit, but Florida and OLE MISS blew them out of the frame.

    I’m not worried about Aubarn for the simple fact that a rude awakening is looming. In addition to that, once Malzahn leaves their program, Chizik’s true colors will begin to show and these hairline wins against Kentucky, Clemson, South Carolina, and Mississippi State were all due in large part to Gus Malzahn.

    As soon as he leaves, they’re going to be in a serious world of hurt.

    As far as this year is concerned, their luck is going to run out against quality opponents and with the meat of their schedule approaching fast, it’s going to happen rather sooner than later.

  7. 10
    Drew

    So what are Alabamas definitions of quality wins? Every game we win you guys will say was luck or because of this or because of that. I’m not quite sure how the double standard works that you guys can dominate in Sabans second year, but Auburn can’t in Chiziks first year. All Alabama is about are double standards. We get lucky with close wins, you guys playing champs with close wins. Makes no sense. And ITK, a true journalist or blogger writes facts. Not just bashes another team by calling then chihuahuas. Once again, good try. I think a few more years back in school would do you and your writing some good.

  8. 11
    julio

    ok, you bammers have got to get on the same page. Cappy and ITK say that AU has lucked into a small amount of success depite Malzahn (you know, dipsydoo, trickeroo, etc.) Now NYC says that AU is only winning BECAUSE of Malzahn. Figure it out guys.

    (Oh no, now ITK’s gonna come back with more of that doggie-sit-bark routine. I’m so ashamed!)

  9. 13
    ITK

    Drew, you’ve barely beaten three unranked, bad to average teams and played a great game against a good opponent inside the warm, snuggly confines of Jordan-Hare.

    It’s the chest thumping that has ensued following our solitary letdown is what we find so adorable.

  10. 14
    Pluto

    We Lost. Nobody is making any excuses. We got beat. This is an saving grace that Aubern will never get.
    It is going to sort itself out for Aubern in the next two weeks. Will they make the Gauntlet ? Do the Deal and Show those Balls. Otherwise – tuck em’ in.

  11. 15
    BPI

    Let’s get something straight….I don’t care if Auburn played 5 straight D2 schools and then beat only South Carolina that is all it takes to slam dunk this arguement. We beat SCAR ….Yes, at our own house ( you act like that there is something wrong with that), but we beat them and racked up massive amounts of ground yardage on them.

    On the flip side of the coin , and listen closely………SCAR whipped your asses like a rented mule in the Kentucky Derby……….Period.

    It’s so funny to hear the excuses I’ve heard today….”you don’t know what it’s like to play with a target on your back”…..”Everyone is getting a bye week before they play us”….and even ” I’m even glad we lost so we get it out of the way and still win the BCS without the pressure”….And ITK, I hate to break it to you and deflate your ego, but Bama has not had a target on their back for 3 years. Florida and Utah removed it very quickly in 08 (that’s the year Florida won the BCS, remember ?)…Try cutting that sum by a third…If I’m not mistaken , you didn’t open 2009 as the preseason #1…that was Florida…So try more like one year….

    Take your medicine like a big boy.

  12. 16
    kevin

    typical bammers. here’s a question…why would you even post anything regarding auburn over a loss to a team auburn beat? is it shame? is it embarrassment? why? yeah, auburn played on their home field, and yeah, auburn played several teams who “bammers” consider “second-rate”….but might i remind you….”second-rate” teams like “missy state”, and LA-MONROE have BEATEN the all-mighty bama. maybe they’re not the team when they played bama (and every bammer will swear by that, simply because they’re bammers), but a win for auburn nonetheless.

    let me just get to my point, i can ramble on and on, but here it is. alabama’s disgraceful loss to SC (in my opinion, an overrated team. again, bammers will swear ALL of their offensive starters will go on to be NFL greats), has nothing, NOTHING to do with auburn. take your loss in stride, bama. accept the fact you WILL NOT go to the NC this year, and also, this year, fear AUBURN. you have every reason to do so.

    war eagle, kevin.

  13. 17
    Drew

    BPI I agree. Just last year Bama fans were saying home field advantage doesn’t mean anything when they were beating teams at home. All it does is create noise. I’ve played at many different schools and every team has a way to overcome noise. Whether silent count, sideline play calling, whatever. We still beat a good South Carolina team by 8 points. And USC isn’t that intimidating. I think I saw as many USC fans as I did UA anyways. Quit making the excuses or playing it off by down playing Auburn. We have beaten THREE SEC teams. THREE. The only time it doesn’t mean anything to win an SEC game is if it’s Vandy. Last I checked both Mississippi State and USC have winning records. And Kentucky is even, and has a good team. Just keep feeding me your bull and I’ll back my words with fact.

  14. 18
    ITK

    And thank you for coming to a Bama site and offering your dissertations on the matter, none of which I read.

    Your presence here and your passionate pleas to try and convince us all that Abarn is more than just a hollow ranking prior to facing the meat of their schedule…well…

    …it’s like a little growling Chihuahua puppy.

    Drew, Julia, BP, Kevin…you made my day.

  15. 19
    Drew

    And you’ve made mine. =]
    I didn’t just come to your site. I was just reading Auburn news and yours was there. Sorry I made you feel special. And I wouldn’t keep up this hollow ranking crap till we lose. I have more of an argument to call yours a hollow ranking than you do ours.
    I’ll leave you be now so that you don’t get the false sense that I truly care what you say. I just wanted to show you how terrible your writing is.
    …it’s like a meowing kitty.
    Sounds dumb right? Ya, yours does too.

  16. 20
    julio

    Glad I could help you out, ITK.

    BTW, I’m just messing around, dude. I know we’re ranked too high and heading for a fall, but it’s fun for now!

  17. 21
    Tide_Mike

    Hey Shane are you going to co-star in bama’s new movie.
    And shane what’s ingram and richardson’s new nick-name.
    How about shut-down and shut-out….

  18. 22
    ITK

    Really Drew? So taking down Arkansas at their place (who you’ll lose to Saturday, btw on Pat Dye field) isn’t worthy of anything?

    Neither is beating Florida or Penn State…then ranked fairly high…not our fault we contributed to their demise…

    OH!!! I get it!!! We lost a game and so anything we’ve done previous to that doesn’t count!!! I’m sorry Drew; I don’t know you very well so I misread what you were saying. My bad, dude.

  19. 26
    BPI

    Here is the kicker…..What are you going to do when we beat Arkansas ? It won;t count because we played them at home ,right…..And then what will you say when we beat LSU ? Nope, doesn’t matter because it isn’ at home……

    Answer truthfully….If we win the next two games, will you take off the gogggles and give credit were it’s due ?

  20. 28
    dave

    Shane, you are about to cry over that loss to SC. Yes, us barners are very elated that your arrogant arses were humbled by a Spurrier coached team. We will always be temporary fans of any school that plays you. I say “you” because you always say “we” as though you played. By the way, you are a wannabe journalist and this little website is a joke. The Capstonereport is laughed at by real journalists.

  21. 29
    ITK

    BP, I can promise you this.

    If Auburn wins the next two games I will give credit where it is due. But first, take off your googles…or gogggles…and admit, you have one quality win, at home. It sends you into euphoria that this win came over a team that just spanked Bama, but if you think the two games are apples to apples, they just aren’t.

    And I can promise you this as well. You come into Bryant-Denny and win, then go to Atlanta and win, I will recognize Frank Chiznik as a legitimate coach.

    Until then, I’m sorry, he’s a sham with one good win in two years.

    Time for another Tampa comment, isn’t Julia?

  22. 31
    crimson hammah

    ole miss beats au handily at ole miss ….13 undefeated teams at this point,,,anybody watching au knows what a horrible team it is …worst 6 0 team of all-time

  23. 33
    Crimsonite

    Ya’ll have fun now ya’ heah! ‘Cause the reckonin’ is comin’. You’re just tickled pigshit pink ’cause we lost. And you’re trying to convert it into some kind of wet dream that Bama losing to a team you barely beat at home, suddenly, magically changes reality; and now, ‘poof’, Abarn is better than us. Bwaa Haww Haww! What’s the line Saturday? Wouldn’t surprise me if Arky is favored over you. Or LSU. I know damn well Bama will be. That should bring you back to reality. By the way, in the Bama, Florida, Abarn, Kentucky series the difference is BAMA by 56 points. Ya’ll have 4.5 more days to laugh it up. RTR!

  24. 34
    julio

    I’m going to start calling Ingram and Richardson “Peas and Carrots”, because Nick Fairley loves peas and carrots and he’s gonna eat ’em right up!

  25. 37
    dave

    Wah waaahhhhh wah! Your little coaching god, by his own admission, got out coached last Saturday. That last td was a thing of beauty by the Cocks. It was a great feeling to know the bammer nation was feeling pain. Their arrogant arses were humbled. The bammer mystique is gone. You are beatable and your coach can be out coached. Cam is coming with Fairley to make Opie junior play worse than he did Saturday. Bwaaaaah!!!!!!!!!! Shane is stupid. If he were a real journalist, he would give credit where credit is due. He is a joke, a blowhard, a self-proclaimed know it all. He wouldn’t dare admit that Cam Newton is one of the most exciting players to come along in the SEC in a long time and he just happens to be an Auburn Tiger. Cock-a-doodle-doooooooo!

  26. 38
    dave

    You should have put a game rooster up there instead of a little mexican dog. Can you honestly say that you are enjoying the Auburn fans ribbing you and gloating over SC’s victory. You can’t stand it you blowhard. If I see you somewhere, I am gonna jap slap you.

  27. 43
    BPI

    ITK….There is a definant double standard in the way you look at Gene Chizik….Nick Saban ran the regular season and didn’t win the SEC or his bowl game……Did that make him an sham of a coach ? No….

    I still think that there is a lot of season left this year. We could drp three games out of our next six….But that would still be an improvement. That is what we are looking for from Gene Chizik….I think we beat Arky. Maybe even LSU…Who knows. Let’s wait and see.

  28. 44
    almightytmc1

    OMG,
    You aubbos have to be kidding me BPR says that beating SCAR proves something? What> That even a blind squarrel can find a nut sometimes?
    If you will go to any website other than one run by an auburn alumni or student you will see that auburn’s stregnth of schedule is a joke. And that joke is designed to get Gene chizik to a bowl game so that Jay Jacobs wont lose his job for making the worst hire in the history of Auburn football.
    Why didnt auburn kick off the season against UCLA? Because they didnt want to risk a loss. So they took the easy way out and kept the creampuff. (Arky State)
    hmmm… I guess they had some foresight on that one. (Ask the texaneers)

    But to even thik that Auburn will come to Bryant Denny and do anything but get the best whipping Nick Saban has ever put on Auburn is laughable.
    Auburn you should despise South caorlina right now. Becasue they have woken up the Rottwieler that has been listening to your “We dominated for 58 minutes” war cry.
    Alabama will flatten Auburn this year. and once again it will quite in Lee County. Until Bowl time when Auburn spends $20 million or so trying to buy a New Year’s Day Bowl against a patsy. And then whoa!!!!!
    Every Auburn fan will be screaming Auburn is back on top!!!! yeehaw!!!!
    Problem is I dont know a single living person that can say Auburn was ever actually on top.
    It sucks to wear Orange and blue and face Bama this year… Just ask Florida.

  29. 45
    almightytmc1

    BTW lets say that Oregon, Boise State and Auburn all go undefeated (By some miracle)
    oregon and Boise State would go to the Championship game Because theur stregnth of schedule is prbably higher than Auburn’s…..

  30. 46
    Crimsonite

    Julietta, I only said Arky might be favored, didn’t say it was a sure thing. But since you want to crow about it, you should know that home field advantage is considered 6 to 7 points. Since Aubie is only favored by 3 at home then it is as certain as the sun will rise tomorrow that on a neutral field Aubie is the Dog. My point has been made. I’ll take me some of that Arky and 3, and I rarely ever bet. But a sure thing is rare. What’s this crap about Spurrious claiming fate helped USCjr, and quoting 10/10/10, and how the scores added up to Lattimore’s number and other mystical shite like that? I wonder how many Chickens the stupid bastard sacrificed before the game? Bet they had an Aztec alter right there in their dressing room. Half time must have been a blast! Bwaa Haww Haww! RTR!

  31. 47
    BamaBrando

    Bravo! Great article ITK, you summed it up perfectly. Julia can hardly contain himself. And look, there are more of them here now so they can have a big Awbun fambly circle jerk. They are coming outta woods now! Man, do these guys have a huge sack or what? Julia really thinks all of us bammers are trembling with the fear that he has been experiencing the past few years. Maybe some crazy Arkansas fan will curb stomp him after acting like a lunatic after the game Saturday.

  32. 48
    julio

    EG, I love how you just pull statements straight from your arse and declare them to be facts. Check any betting publication and it will tell you that oddsmakers adjust the lines by 3 points for the homefield advantage. That’s not to say 3 points is an accurate number, because there’s no scientific way to prove an accurate number. Nonetheless, when the oddsmakers are counting beans and crunching numbers on Sunday afternoon, 3 pts for the home team gets thrown in the mix.

    It’s 8:45 AM Central Time. Read this post quick, because ITK will be pulling it down in less than 5 minutes.

  33. 49
    BPI

    If (big if) Auburnwins its next two games , we will be in the top three. Wrte that down. Beating the #12 (Arky is 12 I think, and also #8 ( if LSU stays undefeated) …We could possibly be #2…To think otherwise is foolish.

    And honostly, you twits better hope that happens, and we beat Ole Miss and Goergia…It’s the only hope you have to get back into the mix.

  34. 50
    BPI

    define “giving credit where it is due”…..If we winn the next two (and keep in mind that is a big if), how do you respond ?

    I already know the answer to this question.

  35. 51
    ITK

    BP, this is an honest question, no spin.

    Why do you care what I think?

    The paranoia Aubies carry around with them must be exhausting.

    If Abarn beats Arkansas and LSU, you’ve beaten them at home. If Alabama beats LSU, then it beat the Hogs and Tigers on the road.

    You tell me; no spin. Is that equal?

    Your answer will determine your objectivity.

    I promise you, flip the circumstances and put all of our big games at home with zero opponents having off-weeks to heal and prepare for us, and AU going unbeaten would leave me speechless.

    But even then, get to the mountain, climb it and breathe the air, even one time in my lifetime, and I’ll give Auburn it’s due.

    But you won’t get there. Auburn will tank this season like they always do. You won’t make it to Atlanta, and you certainly won’t make it to Glendale.

    12-2 would be a fantastic job for Chiznik, giving him a career record of 25-26.

    I will say I’m impressed with what I’ve seen of Cam, but again, taking the goggles off, he’s faced one tough opponent, at home.

    How can you expect me or anyone not sipping orange and blue kool-aid not to be skeptical?

    But back to my original question:
    Why do you care?

  36. 52
    BPI

    Who said I cared ? I am entertaining myself on an internet message board. Don’t confuse entertainment with concern.

    The question is : Why the hell do YOU care ?

    Every single article that you write is in some way associated with or pertaining to…. guess who ???? Auburn.

    Let’s not overlook this. An Alabama fan , on an Alabama site , simply 100% flat out obsessed with the so called ‘little brother” across the state. And then has the stones to call out an Auburn fan that responds to articles about Auburn….It’s so retarded that I really don’t know how to respond.

    I answered your question….Now back to my question…

    Why do you care ? Or better yet, Why is every column you write about Auburn ?

    I actually know the answer to this question, but I want to see if you are man enough to answer it yourself.

    Quick, check my spelling and punctuation.

  37. 53
    Mutt the Hoople

    Bammer will be lucky to finish 8-4 this year. After the Crimson Menstrual Tide gets hammered by The Mississippi State University, you’ll be lucky to have enough to have numbers to compete. For Bammer to upset TMSU, everything has to go right for you as well as for TMSU to come out flat. For the past 4 seasons, we’ve 2-2 against each other, and 2010 will be the Rubber Match.

  38. 54
    ITK

    Thanks for your contribution to the site today, Mutt. Now back you go to your happy place.

    BP, here’s the long answer:
    I laugh at Abarn and its fans over the delusion and pretended importance they manufacture for themselves. It gets funnier when they try and stack their concoctions against real achievement, like what’s taken place in Tuscaloosa.

    Where it gets hysterical is when the arguments begin, presently at the euphoric response when they think they’re “gaining ground on Bama.”

    All of this paranoia is wrapped in fear. Fear that they will continue to be obscure and unimportant, and fearful that big brother will keep piling up hardware.

    It’s the reason Navid Nousel climbed behind a microphone and recorded his embarrassing ramblings in 2005.

    Well, there’s reason to fear. And there’s reason to be paranoid.

    Alabama football isn’t going anywhere, and any notion from one bad game in two and a half years in the worst of circumstances that Abarn has gained ground and assured anything but an ass kicking on November 26th is a complete fairytale.

    And no clever response about Tampa or other retarded blog refuse changes the fact that Alabama competes for championships, while Abarn just competes against Alabama.

    The short answer: Like a family of midgets playing beach volleyball, it’s just fun to laugh at Abarn.

  39. 55
    13andCounting

    I think the Auburn delusion and Aubsession are being proved quite nicely from the comments on this article.

    Good job ITK !

  40. 56
    BamaBrando

    Who left the gate open and let all these bandwagon Auburn fans loose on here? Funny, Bama loses one, then they all get more brave and act like they have been part of the discussion all along. ITK has been taking them all on, and he is single handedly smacked all of you fools around. Good job ITK. When Auburn chokes it is going to be back to normal: BP and her girl Julia will still be around to take their usual lumps, and all the band wagoners will fold up their flags, roll the toilet paper up, and go back to hiding and watching Bama outshine you again.

  41. 57
    ITK

    Thanks my brothuhs. Everyone has hobbies. Some people hunt, some fish, some play golf.

    My hobby is pointing out the obvious.

  42. 58
    BPI

    I was thinking that the reason for the constant anti-AU articles had more to do with internet traffic on the site than anything else…Maybe I’m wrong, but when all the articles are about UA , and UA related matter, the post count suffers quite a bit. As a matter of fact, it’s like a ghostown in here. Julio and I should recieve royalties for the amount of traffic we deliver to your blog, and you know it.

    Heck, just the responses I evoke from my stalker above are enough to warrent new contracts from half your advertisers.

  43. 60
    Crimsonite

    No Julia it’s you dumbass Barners who find some generic shite and then try to custom fit it say what the hell ever point you’re trying to make. You dumbass, the 3 points are average. You phucking think every team and every stadium are cut and dried exactly equal for home advantage? Dumbass, Duke has no home field advantage in their pissy little 45,000 seat stadium when playing a team like Alabama. But LSWho probably has a 7 to 10 point advantage at night in Death Valley. I’ll guarantee you Bama has a 8 to 10 point advantage in BDS, Texas the same in Memorial Stadium, Penn St at Happy Valley, Nebraska in Lincoln and so on. OK dumbnuts, maybe the Barn only has a 3 point advantage in JHS; if so I’d be damned ashamed if I were you. Anyway, I said maybe they would be favored, and even by your standards 3 points in JHS means even in neutral which kind of knocks the shite out of you claiming USCjr is better than Arky. You’ll be damn lucky if the Barn is favored over LSWho in JHS, but Bama will be in Death Valley.

  44. 63
    Crimsonite

    Who’s this dumbass Mutt. Gawddamn, we lose one game in 2 years and even the shite from the #3 school in phucking Mississippi is over here running their mouthes. TMSU? What a phucking laugh. You’re #3 behind the Weebles and Eagles! RTR!

  45. 64
    Tidefan63

    I moved away from Alabama 10 years ago and I still miss it. I frequent AL.com and this site regularly to get news on Alabama. I am amazed at how after every story an Auburn fan is the first to comment. I am sure it happens on both sides but I am just not interested in reading about your second rate team. The simple truth is traditionally Auburn is the second best team in Alabama. Always has been always will. You have second rates players (mostly Bama rejects). A crappy little stadium. Most people outside of the southeast don’t even realize you play in the state of Alabama and could care less! Your not relevant! Your best spokesman is Robert Gibbs and look what pathetic looser he works for! How many songs or movies make reference to Auburn? I cant think of any. Keep telling yourself your great but everyone knows your delusional!

    Great article ITK!

  46. 65
    13andCounting

    AJC description of Auburn fans -> “Try to be as arrogant as Alabama fans with only one tenth the justification”.

    I believe that and Tidefan63’s post basically states the bloody obvious to everyone in the world but the Aubies (even though deep down, they know it’s true).

    Later !

  47. 67
    ITK

    weagle I’m not even sure what you just said. While I hate to see AU win, I’m beginning to lean toward wanting you at 11-0 coming into BDS. Taking your hopes and dreams…and Atlanta…will be an early Christmas treat for me.

  48. 68
    dbau93

    bwahahahahah! I love it. We’re scared hugh? Is that why you spent all this time writing about AU on a bammer blog? That sound you hear is the storm turning, bammer. Yeah, that’s right. The storm that satan talked about last year – you know, the sh&% storm. Well that storm has picked up momentum and strength and its heading directly towards t’loser. You better bunker down boy because there’s nothing you can do to stop the destruction that is about to rain down on you. You have been exposed. You can’t win if you can’t run. We already know AU can stop any rushing attack and it’s proven it can stifle yours. Mcelboy, who hasn’t lost a game in 4 days, will have to try to win it and this time he’s going to have a force to deal with in AUs DLine. And we know you won’t be able to contain Cam while trying to cover everything else going on with your weak corners.

  49. 69
    Crimsonite

    dbau93, let me set something straight! Bwaa Haww Haww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The shite storm is coming to T-Town???????????? Bwaa Haww Haww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Exposed???????????????? Exposed?????????????????? Bwaa Haww Haww!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There was nothing drastically wrong with our offense. Last year they shut down the pass and we ran for 300 yards. This year they shut down the run and we passed for 300 yards. And they did’t really shut down the run. We got away from it because the phucking D let them get so far ahead and kept scoring that we had to go to the pass. 21 points is more than we scored against them last year, and should have been enough. The only thing you saw Barnie, was a very young D that didn’t listen and drank the phucking Koolaid. If you think Tricky Nicky will allow that to happen again, especially against Owbren, then you’ve not only been drinking Blue Koolaid, but you’ve been spiking it with Blue Aguave Tequila. What D-Line is it that we have to deal with? Ohhh! You mean the D-Line that couldn’t sack Hartline and gave up 35 points to, Bwaa Haww Haww, Kentucky? Dream on fool!!!!!! RTR!!!!!

  50. 70
    BPI

    McElnerd has lost his mojo…..Your defense has lost its players. Julio broke his han. You lost to SCAR. Auburn is ranked highr than you. Saban got in trouble for cussing.

    What else is there ?

  51. 71
    julio

    EG, you are a very stupid man with obvious limitations in your reading skills. As I stated, the 3 pt homefield advantage rule is nothing more than a tool used by oddsmakers when they crunch their numbers. As I also said, “[t]hat’s not to say 3 points is an accurate number, because there’s no scientific way to prove an accurate number.” See, I never said that 3 pts is accurate. Get it now?

  52. 72
    Crimsonite

    Julietta, shutup the phucking mumbo jumbo!! I told you Owbren should be favord by 6-7 on their home field (as I feel JHS is one of the tougher venues to play in), and that since you’re only favored by 3 that Arky in reality is considered a better team. Then you jump in with your damn 3 point bullshite with a side note that it isn’t set in stone, but with intention of letting everybody know that you’re saying it means Owbren is the better team. Doublespeak moron. The fact is JHS is worth more than three points just as that blue shite in Boise is worth a hell of a lot more than 3 points. So the final point is that Arky is considered to be equal to or better than Owbren – not worse. And I’m am tired of arguing with a numbnuts idiot who is dumber than a box of rocks. My point’s been made. Anyone interested or halfway literate can read them. Nuff said! Butt Plug, I’ll tell you what dumbnutts. You take McElroys QB rating from Saturday with 315 yards, 80% completion on 27-34 passing, 2 td’s and no ints. Should come out over 200. I’ll wager you your damn QB will never have a +200 game in his career. Julio with 2 broken hands is better than any receiver you have and is ranked above all of your receivers in SEC stats. With a broken hand he outdid any Owbren receiver and he was playing against a real defense as opposed to Kentucky’s. Owbren is in a temporary position until Sunday morning and I wouldn’t be bragging about an unbeaten team being ahead of a beaten team in coaches by only 31 points and Harris by only 7 points. And just where did Nick get in trouble for cussing? The only mention I have seen of it in every sports publication in the country was by that piece of shite Owbren lover Scarbuttsky. So who gives a shite? Personally I wish he had the balls to tell all of you exactly what he thinks of you. I’ll give you the one on defense. They played like shite. They are the only reason we lost. They don’t deserve to wear Crimson and White. But don’t expect to ever see them play like that again. In Nick’s presser today he was so hoarse he could hardly talk, and I swear there were pieces of the defense’s ass hanging out of the corners of his mouth. RTR!

  53. 73
    BPI

    Crimson…..They don’t have the players…Cody, McClain, and Arenas are not just replaced. You can really tell those guys are gone.

  54. 74
    BamaBrando

    This is pretty funny, look at the all the giddy Aubies here. When BPs team gets curb stomped, all yall come on back and lets talk some more okay? Bama will be just fine. They didn’t luck into the streak they were on. No team has ever won every game. This is only the 3rd loss in 3 years, and all of the sudden its over in y’alls eyes. Talk about delusional. A one loss Bama will overtake a 1 loss Auburn team in the polls. Watch and see. Saban is still a better coach than Chizik, a better recruiter than Chizik, and will win more often than Chizik. Regardless of what Bama is doing, Auburn is just barely getting by each week. Hardly dominating anyone. But Bama is over now that is just funny. Shula is not coaching there anymore, but y’all act like he is for some reason. Stupidity.

  55. 75
    BPI

    Shula’s problem wasn’t recruiting , it was coaching.. Several of your marquis players from last year and in 08 were Shula recruits. I’m not saying he outrecruited Saban, because he didn’t …But he got some good players.

    It’s funny to see how you guys spin Auburns success …..ITK’s “home game” arguement is null and void….Are you guys aware that you nearly had the exact same schedule last year ????? Does that nullify the BCS trophy ????? Of course not. Sounds stupid doesn’t it ????

  56. 76
    AU Bill

    You bammers are a dissgrace. I’m so tired of your stupid posts and your stupid writers and your stupid people like Brando and Itk. Cam Newton will slice thru your pathtic defense and take Sabun with him. Then he’ll rip Sabun to shreds and skullfuck him. Auburn will take it’s rightful place atop the SEC and you bammers will keep crying and wailing. You think Tubby fucked ya’ll? You wont see anything like when Chizik comes into Ttown with the mighty Auburn Tigers and laze waste to your program. Nick Fairley will put Mcelroy on the ground so many times he’ll be looking for Crodie Broyles number for sympathy. Remember 6 in a row? Chizik will have 7! Remember Punt Bammer Punt? He’ll have some of those 2. We’ll be heading to Ttown and peeing all over the statues of Sabun, Bryant, and John Mark’s daddy. The whole Bammer team will need so much therapy that they will check into Brice. Newton will win the Heisman and act like a man not like that pussy Mark Ingram bawling onstage and becoming the laughinstock of the football world. We’ll have the crystal trophy too but we’ll actually have a real ceremony honoring the 2010 Auburn Tigers instead of your Walmarts ceremony.

    So just wait till all this happens LOOSERS!! War Damn Eagle!!!

  57. 77
    13andCounting

    AU Bill….calm down and take your medication.

    I do like your quote “Auburn will take it’s rightful place atop the SEC”.

    How many SEC championships has Auburn won? And…is it enough to claim it as you “rightful place”?

    I was having a bad day, but that did give me a good laugh. Thanks, man!

  58. 78
    BamaBrando

    BP, your spin so much here you can’t walk a straight line. I am not spinning Auburns success. But you are barely winning, with a favorable home schedule. But props to Auburn for being undefeated. Still a long way to go. Go ahead and write Bama off, roll your trees and celebrate. Kiss Julia and cry your tears of joy. But when the rug gets snatched from under you, don’t start spinning your BS here.

  59. 79
    BamaBrando

    Where have you been Bill? Haven’t seen you since you crawled from under that rock, the same one you will be crawling back under soon enough. But thanks for showing your ignorance. You do sum up the AU fanbase mentality pretty well. Keep up the good work, you ugly vulgar little man.

  60. 81
    Crimsonite

    Hey, I don’t dis anybody with a physical or mental handicap except Barners. Bwaa Haww Haww! It’s a lowlife piece of shit who makes fun of a boy with Down’s Syndrome. What’s more I’m not stone wall stupid like that brain dead piece of sewage. Anybody from Alabama who reads his trash would have a coronary from laughing so hard. In fact I don’t think there’s a Barner stupid enough to believe that shit. I think the guy’s a Bammer being sarcastic. RTR!

  61. 82
    Crimsonite

    No, the schedule wasn’t even close. Duke is better than any of the non FBS schools we played last year. San Jose St is at least in the WAC whereas last year all three non FBS schools were from sisters of mercy conferences. USCjr is better. Arky is better. We played Arky, Tenn, LSU and USCjr at home. This year either Aubie or LSU may be undefeated and or with just 1 loss when we play. Few opponents had the week off before they played us. And we traded Kentucky for Florida. Don’t know what your point is, but this years schedule is much more difficult. RTR!

  62. 83
    ITK

    AU Bill, which game gave you the most confidence in Cam?

    Was it La.Monroe, or maybe was it Missy State, Arky State or Kentucky?

    Spencer Pennington looked fantastic a few times against Kentucky or Southern Miss. Was he a “slicer” too?

    Case in point, Cam has shown flashes, but the jury is still out on him. He’ll be tested the next couple weeks, but that twelfth game AU plays…the only way I’d bet in your favor on that one is if I was playing with house money.

    He isn’t a threat with his arm…not a pinpoint passer in other words. He beats you with his legs.

    Too bad we don’t have a coaching staff who knows how to stop a big quarterback that can beat you with his legs.

    Oh wait, yeah we do. Didja watch last year’s SEC Championship game?

    I’ll save you a seat in Bryant-Denny in 37 days.

    The expression on Camputer’s face will be precious when it’s shown on one of our four jumbotrons. And don’t think our stadium camera crew won’t be trained on that mug in the final minutes when it all comes crashing down and he along with everybody knows there’s nothing left to do but accept the fact he was just dominated.

    That bewildered look…will be precious, even more so than the time he stole that laptop.

  63. 84
    Crimsonite

    I hope you poor bastards have tough skin. You better hope you win day after tomorrow. Your sorry assed dissing spree that all of you went on this week after USCjr has set your asses up for the worst curb stomping in the history of college football if you dare lose to Arky – or to anybody for that matter. It’s just going to show you that you never let your mouth overload your asshole. RTR!

  64. 85
    ecb

    Chizik will have 7 in a row? Hasn’t bama done 9 in a row…twice?

    And as far as the whole bammer crap: so, your definition of being classy is rolling in the mud? I dunno, I’ve always thought class was not stooping down to mudslinging.

    Anyone who knows anything about football knows that you cannot compare the SCAR/Bama and SCAR/Auburn games and come to any conclusion about the Bama/Auburn games. If Auburn’s offense was a pocket pass/power run offense, yeah you’d be able to point out some things, but they are not (don’t try to claim Cam is a pocket passer, it’ll just prove your ignorace). Gus’ll take some cues from the SCAR game, but is Auburn’s defense really all that similar to SCAR’s? Nope. Did Auburn face the same Garcia as Alabama? Nope. There are no conclusions a reasonable person can make beyond Auburn matched up better with SCAR than Bama did. trying to say one team is better than another at this point is as foolish as saying rock is better than paper because rock beat scissors and scissors beat paper. Anyway, it’s pointless. It will be settled on the field.

    Anyway, there’s way too much football between now and then. Offenses and defenses evolve over the course of the season. There’s plenty of time for catastrophic injury on both sides.

  65. 86
    almightytmc1

    So let me get this straight, ITK writes it and the auburns rush on here and confirm it.
    Wep, I beleive any rational person would say the same.
    Continue onward with your practical world delusion oh great Aubbos.

  66. 88
    BamaBrando

    BP, Auburn is barely getting by. Auburns D is giving up as many points has Cam can get. That won’t happen against everyone. Right now, Bama just needs to get to the off week, and heal up and regroup. They are a good team, but injuries are affecting them this year more so than last year. They limped into the Tennessee game last year, and come out after the break and did pretty well. But don’t think there is no one who can’t stop Cam.

  67. 89
    Bama J

    Trust me, Cam is 6’6″ and that is a tough guy to bring down, but it can be done and once he gets that one good hit from trying to run on a tough SEC defense, like LSU or Bama, then he will think twice about trying to run the ball all the time. I can’t wait to see that day come. He hasn’t gotten a helmet put in his chin strap real good yet, but you can bet it is coming. As far as the Aubumms, our defense is very young and inexperienced this year and are in no way comparable to last year’s defense, but yet they are still playing very well right now and getting the job done as best they can and you can bet they will only get better from here on out. It is what it is. RTR!!

  68. 90
    Crimsonite

    Ok, to all my fellow Bammers out there here’s the way it’s going down. Don’t wax poetic or philosophic and don’t believe those who have already done so.
    Just because we got embarrassed last week, this Alabama team IS NOT going to roll Ole Miss like a sugar coated turd. Our games have always been close with them regardless of the quality of the two treams playing each other. This Alabama team is not the ’08 Gators. We will not reform under the promise of GMAC and average 55 points a game the rest of the season against SEC competition. No Alabama football team has ever averaged 55 points a game nor ever will. The prognosticators who are predicting a 60 point blowout are in a fantasy land. This team has injuries on offense and issues on defense. Issues of youth, inexperience, attitude and identity. Issues that will not be repaired in 5 days – no matter how much Saban screams and cusses at them. Maybe later in the season some of them will improve, but they will never be what the ’09 defense was. We are missing, besides just experience and identity – 2 irreplacable objects. Rolando McClain and Terrence Cody. Missing Cody really concerns me in that the 3-4 defense will not work without a nose guard like him. Which brings up the question as to why we don’t have someone already and why are we not recruiting someone for ’11 and ’12????? There is no excuse. There are defensive linemen Cody’s size playing for several teams right now. There is not 1 single 6′-6″, 360lb lineman who would not forsake his favorite team where he will play obscurely in a 4-3 or 5-2 defense, to come to Alabama and be the star of Nick Saban’s 3-4. So where the hell are these guys? Why did’t Nick plan ahead as soon as he signed Cody? As for McLain, the only solution is to hope somebody matures fast from the LB’s or DB’s. But there will never be another Rolly. And without two players of that type we will not have another D equal to ’09 anytime soon. I think we can win out. We may even end up being the best team in the country. But we won’t be blowing anybody out by 60 points except maybe Georgia St. So don’t get your hopes up. Just ride it out and hope for the best. RTR!

  69. 91
    almightytmc1

    Clam down there nite.
    It isnt that bad.
    Bama is young and loaded, (Think ’08)
    The defense will eventually be a juggernaut. Terrance Cody was a rare athlete. But then again look at josh Chapman. he is no small fry and he is ridiculously strong. There is 3 years worth of quality developmental depth behind him. And as far as Secondary. Saban has what may be the best secondary ever if given some time to mature.
    I beleive the level of expectation was a bit too high this year. it usually is for a defending National Champion.
    But Nick Saban has as close to an NFL team as you can get and I can gaurantee that with a little more maturity they will contend again.
    If they win the SEC. They probably will.
    The difference between now and previous years is that we beleive our team can actually win the SEC. 5 years ago we just hoped we could compete.

  70. 92
    Sluggo

    Actually, the delusion seems to reside in west Alabama. All this talk about still making it to the MNC game? Uh uh. You’re not through losing yet. Word is that some dissension has set in among the troops. Never good.

  71. 93
    ITK

    Yeah, Sluggo, and I heard that Barrett Trotter is tired of Cam not going to class and benefitting from a double-standard from the coaching staff, and there’s a controversy building.

    See how that works? Isn’t that neat how I can do that too?

    Now quick, respond with another masturbatory fantasy. Your first legitimate shot to beat us again is next year in Jordan-Hare, and that’s just because strange things happen inside that stadium…some legal.

    Prepare for November 26th. I’d go fishing that day if I were you. Wherever you’re reading this now, that’s the closest you’re getting to Atlanta this year.

  72. 95
    almightytmc1

    Wow Auburn had a career day against Arkansas today.
    But then again they gave up 43 points. I would say Auburn was good, But Arkansas just does not have an Affense. Period.

  73. 96
    Crimsonite

    Today was the worst officiated day in the history of football. The SEC should hide it’s face in shame. Nobody could miss some of those calls. There were calls made correctly on the field and then overturned in the replay booth, that were so phucking obvious that it could only have been done if the officials were on the take. I’m embarrsssed to be associated with the SEC. The shite happened in every game I watched and there were ample phucked up calls for each team. But the inexcusable one was the Barnie – Arky game. The officials should have just told everybody to go home before the kickoff as the game had already been decided. Arky was the better team and on a neutral field with refs from another conference Arky would win by three or four td’s. Arky got a bad call late in the Florida game last year, but that was nothing. I’ve never seen a team butt phucked by the refs from start to finish like today. I’ve kind of ignored all the SEC ref BS since it popped up last year, but no more. I’m just phucking astounded and dismayed. I have no other option but to believe the SEC is fixing games using the refs. The FBI should get involved under the Rico act. Phuck the refs and phuck Aubie! And I told yall Bama wasn’t gonna look like world beaters and blow anybody out just because they got embarrassed last week. In fact they didn’t look a whole hell of a lot better than last week other than they played a team that couldn’t do shite instead of one that did everything right. If they don’t improve across the board before LSU, we are going to lose two more games in the regular season. The rest of the country is trying to help us. Hell the two teams I thought had the best chance of going undefeated, lost today. Now I feel confident that Oregon, Oklahoma and Mich. St will all lose one also. The problem is with Bama looking like shite and the computers liking Boise and TCU, we will not jump them if they are undefeated. We will gain if we beat LSU, Auburn and a 2 or 3 loss East team in Atlanta, but we will never gain the almost 4 points we are behind playing the way we did tonight. Sorry guys, but I think we can quit worrying about the BCSNCG and start thinking about next year.

  74. 97
    Roman

    “ITK Says: Really Drew? So taking down Arkansas at their place (who you’ll lose to Saturday, btw on Pat Dye field)…”

    This prediction did not turn out well.

  75. 98
    BPI

    It’s so funny to see this board meltdown. Keep telling yourselves it’s going to be O.K.

    Our defense is not playing well, but made something happen when they needed to.

    What about that BCS poll ?????

    So funny….

  76. 99
    BPI

    My gosh…..I just can’t stop…..What about you peoples lame arguement about SOS ? Any one seriously want to go there now ? We now KNOW Miss St. IS better than Florida (remember, your teams signature win ?). Kentucky is better than Penn St. Clemson is better than Duke ( yes I was wrong on Clemson, but theey aren’t a bad team)…. You guys were / are wrong on every level.

    How does it feel to be 4 spots behind us in the BCS ?

  77. 103
    julio

    BPI, my personal favorite is ITK’s post from above where he argues that “Cam has shown flashes, but the jury is still out on him.” ESPN just named him the unequivocal leader in the Heisman race, closing the article by stating “right now, times are tough for everybody not named Cam Newton when it comes to the race for this season’s Heisman Trophy.” I think the jury’s come back with its verdict.

  78. 104
    BPI

    Yes…He berated and clained that Chizik had no credibility when he said he “reminded” him of Dante Culpepper and Vince Young….Heck, he is probably better than both.

    My gosh it’s good to see these turds crawl back under the rock.

  79. 105
    Crimsonite

    Try posting on something besides an obsolete thread morons. How pathetic. A bunch of Awbies over here holding a conversation amongst themselves on a Bama board. Obsessed a little? Newton’s undoing is coming. Maybe a long time before we get to him. I’m thinking losses to LSU and Georgia before the beatdown in T-Town. RTR!

  80. 106
    BPI

    We have to talk to each other Crimson. The rest of your base ran like roaches when the lights are turned on.

    Seriously, where are all your little big mouth bammer buddies now ?

    Typical bammer behavior…Is it 2006 again ?

  81. 107
    mandy

    You bammer trash still over here thinking we are gonna lose wk after wk. What a bunch of idiots. I hope we put your pussy qb out of his misery. Good hit will knock his ass out. Good luck with that lol War Eagle

  82. 108
    13andCounting

    I’m comfortable with the rest of the Defending National Champions schedule. I don’t think we’ll lose another game, since we really don’t have anyone left to play. We’ll need help in the national race, but we should be SEC champions this year.

    Roll Tide!

  83. 109
    dave

    Finescum said that the only way bammer would lose would be to go to sleep. After watching that boring arse game on sat. against Ole Miss, I know what he means. I had rather watch paint dry.

  84. 111
    BamaHate

    8-0. I think Oklahoma is losing, could be we will be 2 on Monday. We are in control of our own destiny. Love it. How does that make you feel, I mean I remember Cheeznicks, barn, etc. All of your mullet jealousy is Greeeeeaaaat! Like Tony the tiger would say.

    Nananananaaaa….. Dew…… dew ….. Cry little mullets.

  85. 112
    Alex Hamilton

    No jealously here hater. Here’s a thought though: Your one and only National Championship is older than you and your head douche, er, coach.

    Enjoy the delusion. You need a defense to win a championship.

    Pretty soon, someone will show that #2 is nothing more than a thieving turd.

    And do us all a favor, take your phucking hollow smack talk to the Bunker and go fuckk yourself.

  86. 113
    BPI

    Alex, you are the one spewing the predictable hollow smack…..If I recall correctly, ITK said that there was no way Auburn would beat Arkansas and LSU, but if they did he would give Auburn the credit they deserve….I really don’t expect it to happen though.

    We had 450 yards rushing agianst LSU….The screboard was not indicative of the whipping we put on them. Yall can look forward to the some of the same that they got.

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