Tubs out: The Tide is high!

Hunter Ford
Tommy Tuberville was a giant thorn in the ass of Alabama fans and I’m glad he’s gone.

I’m glad the prick has no more digits to throw up in our faces. We can extend a big “Number One” middle finger to him as he exits.

But Auburn is foolish to send him packing. And Tuberville? Well, he may have cried at his farewell address to his players…but he can wipe his tears, and whatever he else he wants to, with $100 bills now. He’s like Brer Rabbit. “Oh please don’t throw me in that briar patch! Please! Not that briar patch made of money! I couldn’t stand it!”

The leaders of the most dysfunctional village on the plains will be shelling out $6 million to rid themselves of a guy who went 7-3 against Alabama and brought them closer to a national championship than any other coach has since 1957. The guy also won… like what?.. three or four Western Division co-championships?

And who does Aw-Bah-Run think it is gonna get to do better? Mike Leach from Texas Tech? BRING HIM ON! Didn’t Bama limit that mad offensive scientist to 10 points in the Cotton Bowl a few short years ago?

Auburn could reach out to a hotshot new coach like that Dooley kid at La. Tech. BRING HIM ON! Go ask Mike Shula how easy it is to win in the SEC as a young coach with a great last name. Daddy Dooley can come watch all the games just like “the Don” did. I’ll enjoy his anecdotes and commentary during halftime of Auburn losses.

Auburn is making a big mistake.

Alabama is loaded with high-powered freshman ammunition this year. As those young guns are seasoned, and as Saban re-loads with fresh bullets, the Crimson army could be even deadlier two, three even four years from now than it has been in this 12-0 campaign.

New coaches, no matter how good they are, almost always have to endure a painful transition year. Consider Saban’s first season. Auburn has guaranteed itself a repeat of this years record or worse for next season. I predict that whoever coaches Auburn next year will last two or three seasons. Then All-Barn will have to start all over again. It could be decades before Auburn regains the success it had under Tuberville.

Alabama fans now can not only enjoy the glow of the undefeated regular season and the 36-0 Iron Bowl win, we can sit back and watch the hi-jinks of Auburn’s coaching search. Perhaps they will give us as good of a show as we gave them from Dubose to Fran to Price to Shula to Rodriguez. The worm has truly turned.