Auburn needs new representatives on the Finebaum Network
By Shane from Centerpoint
I know this may sound disingenuous coming from a writer whose ultimate loyalty lies with the Alabama Crimson Tide but, for the sake of quality radio, I must be honest and objective with the “football-clueless†Tiger Cubs who represent Team Auburn on the Finebaum Radio Network. Tommy Tuberville isn’t the only man consumed by paranoia and neurotic thoughts since Nick Saban’s arrival at Alabama. Saban has upset you so badly that “game†is no longer part of your repertoire.
All four of you have lost your confidence and your performances have been reduced to childish rants with no substance. The only cards you have left in your hands are publicity stunts, false accusations, and mindless blather about six-in-a-row. What happened to the “hard-fighting soldiers†who used to bring intelligent arguments, witty “takes†and some quality to the table?
I’ll refrain from mentioning any names so you can maintain some semblance of credibility – at least in your own mind. If you choose to do nothing to improve yourself, then so be it. However, there is still time to correct the situation.
Let’s get real for a minute. Paul Finebaum is a professional and he expects his featured callers to be prepared to perform at the highest level. As we all know, a “great†caller brings his “A-game†every day. The PFRN’s vast audience is above average in intelligence and you simply cannot continue to drop the ball when you are on the air. If you’re not careful you’ll end up on the bench with the rest of the has-been losers like B.O.B.
I must admit that, as a professional caller and analyst, I really enjoy hearing you struggle and flop like a fish on Paul’s stringer. Nevertheless, lately I start to nod-off when one of you calls the show. If you don’t wake up soon and improve your tactics you might just fade-to-black.
Imagine that you’re someone driving through the state of Alabama on a sunny afternoon listening to Finebaum. During the course of the show you get to hear the “Three Aumigos†– a farmer from Reeltown, a redneck from Montgomery and a Steak-out delivery boy from Birmingham. You must be saying to yourself, “Are these clowns the best Aubie spokespeople the Auburn family has to offer?†Inevitably you come to the realization that it is sad—but true. You not only are subject to culture shock – you may suffer culture electrocution after listening to that series of calls.
We should never say never, but the perception war between Finebaum’s Alabama callers and the Aubie mouthpieces has shifted so far in Bama’s favor that it is no longer a contest. Realistically speaking, right now Tommy Tuberville needs every public relations boost he can get and Team Auburn is providing little or no help. Eventually, Finebaum might put this crew out of business. If he does, the show’s quality will improve and maybe Auburn can supply a higher-caliber group of callers.
OLDTRAFFORDMAN…….DONT BE HATIN ON BAMMA !!!!!!! Look , I understand that you are jelous of the Tide. Who wouldnt be. We have 12 National championships boy. How amany does UGAY have? 2 or 3? Yall and got no Turdishun so SHUT UP !!!!!!!!!!!! You arent even worthy to say the word BAMA. As far as somebdy from GORGEE coming over here to try to give me an english lesson, PULEEESEE !!!!!!! Save that crap for the toothless inbred hicks that we all know as JAWJANS !!!! Old traffordman have you ever been to Esom Hills JAWJA ? Heck you prolly live there dont you ? Yall got lucky against us last year , but just like the rest of the SEC we know your SKEERED. You know that Bama and SAban are gonna beat you like the red headed dog barking spastics that you are? Can you understand that Bammas stay of execution is over and we ARE GONNA KICK JAWJEES MONKEY ASSES NEXT TIME WE PLAY!!!!!
Keep it down home cuz!
OH YEAH…. Old Traffordman. Wernt you Warren Beattys stunt double in DELIVERANCE? After all that epic film was shot in Georgia. The land were the DAWGS rule and the sheep are nervous.
RRROOOOLLL TTTTIDDDDDDDEE RRRROOOLLLLL!!!!!!!!!
Old Trafford man,
Great post! Aren’t you glad that Georgia Tech, Florida and Auburn, as huge rivals of Georgia at least have a bit of class? I, as a life long Auburn supporter am proud to say I appreciate Georgia and feel they will be in the Conference Championship game this season and most likely against Auburn. I’m certain it won’t be Alabama, they’ll be lucky to break even again this year.
It’s great to be an Auburn Tiger! Go Georgia, go Florida, Go Vols, Go Vandy, Go Rebels, Go Cocks (of South Carolina not Shane and Crimson Crackpipe), Go Mississippi State, Go Hogs, Go Kentucky, Go LSU and finally…Bama sux!
SHANES PAIN ……
YOU HAVE MESSED WITH THE BULL, NOW YOU WILL GET THE HORNS
JAWJA= NO TURDISHUN
AWBURN= NO TURDISHUN
BAMA= THE EPITOME OF TURDISHUN
BEAR= WERNT NUTTIN BUT A WINNER
TUBBS= NO CLASS FINGER RAISER
T-TOWN=EPICENTER OF CULTURE
AWBURN= EPICENTER OF COW HOCKEY
YALL ALL KNOW THAT YOU ARE JEALOUS OF BAMMA SO JUST ACCEPT IT AND SHUT YOUR PIE HOLES AND GO BEAT YOUR WIFE/SISTER/COUSIN…
HAHAHA, that was pretty damn funny Crackpipe.It would have been gutbusting if you had gotten it right. It was Ned Beatty.
You make a laughing stock of the entire Bama Nation. It is true that a new spokesman is needed on the PFRN. Anyone to replace you and the putrid crap coming out of your sewer mouth. You are truly a d**khead