Auburn needs new reps on PFRN

Auburn needs new representatives on the Finebaum Network
By Shane from Centerpoint
I know this may sound disingenuous coming from a writer whose ultimate loyalty lies with the Alabama Crimson Tide but, for the sake of quality radio, I must be honest and objective with the “football-clueless” Tiger Cubs who represent Team Auburn on the Finebaum Radio Network. Tommy Tuberville isn’t the only man consumed by paranoia and neurotic thoughts since Nick Saban’s arrival at Alabama. Saban has upset you so badly that “game” is no longer part of your repertoire.

All four of you have lost your confidence and your performances have been reduced to childish rants with no substance. The only cards you have left in your hands are publicity stunts, false accusations, and mindless blather about six-in-a-row. What happened to the “hard-fighting soldiers” who used to bring intelligent arguments, witty “takes” and some quality to the table?

I’ll refrain from mentioning any names so you can maintain some semblance of credibility – at least in your own mind. If you choose to do nothing to improve yourself, then so be it. However, there is still time to correct the situation.

Let’s get real for a minute. Paul Finebaum is a professional and he expects his featured callers to be prepared to perform at the highest level. As we all know, a “great” caller brings his “A-game” every day. The PFRN’s vast audience is above average in intelligence and you simply cannot continue to drop the ball when you are on the air. If you’re not careful you’ll end up on the bench with the rest of the has-been losers like B.O.B.

I must admit that, as a professional caller and analyst, I really enjoy hearing you struggle and flop like a fish on Paul’s stringer. Nevertheless, lately I start to nod-off when one of you calls the show. If you don’t wake up soon and improve your tactics you might just fade-to-black.

Imagine that you’re someone driving through the state of Alabama on a sunny afternoon listening to Finebaum. During the course of the show you get to hear the “Three Aumigos” – a farmer from Reeltown, a redneck from Montgomery and a Steak-out delivery boy from Birmingham. You must be saying to yourself, “Are these clowns the best Aubie spokespeople the Auburn family has to offer?” Inevitably you come to the realization that it is sad—but true. You not only are subject to culture shock – you may suffer culture electrocution after listening to that series of calls.

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We should never say never, but the perception war between Finebaum’s Alabama callers and the Aubie mouthpieces has shifted so far in Bama’s favor that it is no longer a contest. Realistically speaking, right now Tommy Tuberville needs every public relations boost he can get and Team Auburn is providing little or no help. Eventually, Finebaum might put this crew out of business. If he does, the show’s quality will improve and maybe Auburn can supply a higher-caliber group of callers.

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58 Comments

Add Yours
  1. 1
    Dyesmoneyman

    What Shane hasn’t realized, it that all three of the callers he mentioned never attended college. They are your typical redneck, sidewalk “alums” that every school has.

  2. 2
    Ballplay indian

    Cant argue with the substance of what he is saying. But What Shane dont realise , Is that on his side of the fence people have been calling for him to get the axe for years. Lets face it people, The Fineboum Show = Jerry Springer. Shane , I-Man, Jim , Bobby, just to name a few are the paternity test havin’ , sister marryin’ , redneck inbreds that make it all entertaining. Those people that go to the race to see the wrecks are the audience of the Paul Finebaum Show. Shane you wish you had Phyliss’ from Mulga’s whit and charm.

  3. 3
    Kevin

    Shanie,

    Here’s a little clue for you: The very vast majority of Auburn fans do not listen to Finebaum. Why? Because he is a) a lousy radio show host and b) a bammer poser. You may enjoy being manipulated by him in order to boost his ratings, but the vast majority of Auburn fans do not.

    If his callers are “above average intelligence” then an above-average IQ is now 68. Bring your “A game?” Only if an “A” is now given for just being able to dial his phone number correctly.

    I’ll tell you what: Since you are SO obviously in need of a “victory” over Auburn, we’ll let you have the Finebaum show. Now go see if you can make yourself a NC t-shirt out of that. I’m sure you can.

  4. 4
    auburn77

    Why are 70% of your columns and 90% of your calls about Auburn… Do you ever discuss BAMA? Finebaum is a Bama show, he disrespects Dye, his promos dish Tommy Tuberville and praise Saban. He and you have Man Crushes on Saban… Also don’t you deliver ice for a living? Does being a professional caller mean that Finebaum pays you to call? What about that great Bama Caller Dawson? You too do a great job of showing everyone that you have no clue….

  5. 5
    Warbird

    “Imagine that you’re someone driving through the state of Alabama on a sunny afternoon listening to Finebaum. During the course of the show you get to hear the “Three ALmigos” – a so called preacher from Vance, a redneck egomaniac from T-Town (yeah that’s you Jim) and an ice delivery guy with a perpetual Finebaum induced woody from Center Point. You must be saying to yourself, ‘Are these clowns the best Bammer spokespeople the Bammer Nation has to offer?’” This is more realistic Shane for brains. Keep it coming, I’m dying over here!

  6. 6
    FinebaumJunkie

    Lmao,all great comments,but the trophy goes to Warbird.Very funny stuff.Shane has as much business posting on a website as his life partner,Hunter Ford.From what I heer,both schools have Shane for brains as callers.Theres Charles,and Dawson,and Bobby, and Jim,but they are all trumped by Iman and Shane.Quick question Shane,who is it that has beaten your beloved school 6 years running?Is it the Auburn Tigers,or is it Ma Bell?As for you being a profesional caller and analyst,lmfaooooooooooo.I have many Bama friends,smart Bama friends and they all hate your guts.You are the shit stain on your school,you look like a uncircumzised dick,but you do have the right job,Iceman,cause your wife says you are cold in the sack.Keep on posting about Auburn and comming up with outlandish lies,meanwhile Auburn will continue to do what it does best,beat Bammer on the field,not on the phone.You may get a job with your BFF Hunter,unless he gets his ass fired from this job too.

  7. 7
    AUTiger

    Wow, a “professional caller!” Man, referring to yourself as a professional caller to make yourself feel better almost makes me feel sorry for you. It’s pretty pathetic, actually. What exactly is a professional caller anyways? Do you get paid to call in, or have you designated this title all by yourself? “What’s your job?” “Oh, I call into radio shows.” And now you are an “analyst?” Who exactly do you provide analyses to, other than this self-made crapstone report? That statement reminds me of young kids who say, “when I grow up I am going to be a cowboy.” Just because you want to do it and you pretend doesn’t mean it is true. I agree with Auburn77. You guys, and particularly you Mullet Head, spend 80-90 % of your time writing and talking about Auburn on your UAT website, and then you have the audacity to say Auburn Alum and fans are envious of UAT. Man, you really need a reality check in the worst way.
    Congrats on your Finebaum NC… maybe someone will paint you calling the radio show and you can buy a print of it at some mall kiosk in B’ham.

  8. 8
    jimbostinson

    I am an Alabama fan. However, I have to agree that the quality of recent callers has been, for the lack of a better word, pathetic. Both of these institutions provide extremely competent and intelligent graduates. Paul kick the quality up a bit so that the Springer syndrome doesn’t pull down what has been a fantastic radio program.

  9. 9
    Shane is a BLOGGER

    Shane you IGNORANT slut!

    I took up for you the other day at the Icehouse. Someone said you liked SH– Sandwiches and I said, “Wait just a second there buddy, he doesn’t like the bread”.

  10. 10
    aubman82

    WOW, another article about Auburn on the crapstain report website. Why does this not suprise me? Here’s a hint…. If you would write about uat on the crapstain report, maybe Auburn fans won’t come on here to get a quick laugh.

  11. 11
    SHANEHATERS

    My I.Q goes down 20 points when I hit the Radio Show and 10 more when Shane hits it. Really the LIL DOG (Shane) following the
    BIG DOG CHEERLEADING (Paul&Nickie) is
    getting old you remind me of the fat kid on the block that wanted to be heard so he yelled.. Ice Deliverer??? WOW!
    Honestly My “AUBIES” dont listen to either of you. I do Because I fell into
    trash Radio/T.V. with Geraldo

  12. 12
    DarkIllusions

    Truthfully, I don’t listen to the PFRN simply because half of the Barnies who call in desperately need a interpreter, just as most of the unwanted ones on here do.

  13. 13
    JuicyJ

    My IQ drops severely each time I visit the Magnolia Belle website.

    As far as the dysfunctional Wire Road Barnie family goes, the only weapons they have to fire is six* in a row. When that streak’s over, what will they have after that? They’ll be out of ammunition and that’s when they’ll disappear from the face of the earth, only to surface immediately after another flaw is exposed in the Alabama program.

  14. 14
    Bama Fan In NYC

    The daily statements made by your typical AUtard on the PFRN:

    -Six in a row.

    -Though probation had nothing to do with Alabama’s slide, they’re still recovering from the effects, and are still not their yet. Therefore, Alabama PolyTECHnic Institute will achieve number 7.

    -Six in a row.

    -Paul Finebaum, I hate you because you’re a biased Alabammer fan.

    -Six in a row.

    -Tuberville is a proven coach. He knows how to win. EDITOR’S NOTE: Obviously not seeing how he was considered a failure until his cross-state superior served a vital role in his sudden transformation.

    -Six in a row.

    -Did I mention six in a row?

    -Tuberville only recruits prospects who display an impeccable amount of character both on and off the field. EDITOR’S NOTE: Well, why is it he offered scholarships to nearly every recruit who committed to Alabama?

    -Six in a row.

    -Nick Saban was a failure with the Dolphins. EDITOR’S NOTE: And do you think Tubby would’ve lasted more than one season with the Dolphins?

    -Six in a row.

    -Nick Saban won with DeNardo’s recruits. EDITOR’S NOTE: Obviously DeNardo couldn’t win with them!

    -Nick Saban only has one more SEC title than Tubby. EDITOR’S NOTE: In five years as an SEC head coach opposed to Tubby who’s been coaching in the conference for 14 years.

    -Oh, and Alabama PolyTECHnic Institute has won the last six meetings.

    -SIX IN A WIRE ROAD!

  15. 15
    Bama_Amy

    Each Aubarn representative on the show, echoes their predecessor. One after another, the goal they accomplish on a daily basis is trash Nick Saban, Alabama, and make note that Alabama Tech has defeated Alabama since the year 2002. Mix that in with Incomprehensible Man’s daily dose of nonsense, and Alabama Tech’s version of Shane, Bobby from Homewood, and that’s a brief overlook on what goes down on the Finebaum show on a daily basis.

  16. 16
    FinebaumJunkie

    Thats the smartest thing I have heard you say Amy,now get those shoes off and get back in the kitchen.Just kidding,but you do make a point,as I said,both schools have idiot callers and both schools have great callers.Its a damn shame that The Opening Drive has Jay Barker,whom I have the utmost respect for,and Al Del Greco,respected also,and they get along great,and I am of the impression they have more insight into their respective schools than that desperate and depraved shit stirer Shane.

  17. 17
    berman

    i’m actually wondering how much the barnies total out on payphone bills each day calling into the radio show. calling fee+long distance fee=two weeks worth of a barnies paycheck, or do they call collect, charging it to the radio show itself? at least their contributing to opelika’s slowly decreasing economy.

    count this as my signature:

  18. 18
    tmc1

    bama fan in NYC,
    you hit the nail on the head.

    Shane, I have to say I am concerned about this post. We all know that Auburn’s curriculum is right up there with The University of Phoenix.
    And that since 2004, An Auburn diploma has been viewed as being virtually worthless. What would make you think that an Auburn opinion would be worth a damn either?

    Shane, here is the flaw in your logic.
    You are actually expecting the Aubbos to do research, listen, and analyise ideas and information and then act upon it. Have you forgotten that the Auburn Nation get all of their information straight from CTT thru people like Phillinp Marshall? Thus about %95 percent out of their mouths is going to be reinvention, embellishment or just a lie that is made up to make Tommy Tuberville look better.

  19. 19
    Kevin

    tmc,

    You never cease to amuse with your delusional rantings. An Auburn degree is “virtually worthless?” Given that Auburn has higher admission standards than UAT, I guess that doesn’t say much about the value of a UAT degree.

    To conclude – no one associated with UAT should ever talk about any other school giving out “worthless” degrees. Just as the functionally illiterate guy with a UAT degree in Public Relations that I had to fire last year. He couldn’t even write an understandable email, and we couldn’t train him to do anything. Yeah, that degree really did a lot for him. And he is just one of many.

  20. 20
    Ty from T-town

    THE FINEBUAM CODE:
    part VI.

    Shane, as I think back about the WERC days, I am reminded of a time when the distance between the famous and the infamous, was hard to discern.

    The study of the downward spiral of dumbness on the PFRN, would take a team of dedicated experts and years of research. They would probably only then, scratch the surface.
    Tell Alex, good luck.
    I am comfortable with the assumption; the PRFN is a (strangely rare phenomenon.)
    Perhaps the cultural decline of our American society, is being reflected by the random callers of a radio show.
    No; it couldn’t be that.

    Shane, I completely agree that there is still time to correct the situation. You know as well as I; desperate times call for desperate measures. I may be on six years worth of double-secret-probation, but I don’t intend to kick-back at the Ranch, and allow a bunch of mongrels to destroy such a fine institution. I suggest that we start with the basics.

    THE PFRN RULE BOOK. You old guys, only have to reach under the kitchen table and retrieve your copy. The young guys will have to go to the Library or purchase the new release from Capstone Report. I have always found the book quite useful, even in everyday life.
    Like rule 3. Don’t call drunk.
    I personally have that one highlighted.
    Paul, has a high level of clarvoiance, sort of like your Mother,Wife or Girl Friend. He will bust your ass every time.
    Not to mention, the inaudible ramblings of a drunk often disrupt the intellectual flow of the script.
    The satirical nature of the show is covered on page 5, along with the script.
    It is followed by a heart warming chapter entitled STELLE JUSTICE by Neal Vickers. The story of a boy and his sheep, will certainly appeal to the younger listeners as well as the growing number of rural contributors to the show.

    You can’t play the game, if you don’t know the rules. Hopefully we can put aside our grievances, and make the PFRN the kind of show that will make us all proud. Shane was right. If you don’t believe, the time is now; just try to imagine your world without it.

  21. 21
    WE OWN BAMA

    Shane,you are a joke.We don’t worry about
    Lil Bar or Special Ed U,we own YOU and your joke of a university.Professional caller?…that’s a new one,will you use it on your resume for the next job you apply for?.I thank God every day I wake up that you are a turd fan,you make your school proud.WAR EAGLE!!!!!!!!!

  22. 23
    AubSux

    Shane, you are an incredible douche. I love the “as a professional caller and analyst” line. What are talking about…you call in to a regional sports talk show…yes, The Finebaum show is fun but you take it way to seriously. Do you understand how lame you sound? I feel dirty even coming to this website and reading this garbage. Auburn sucks, and so do you.

  23. 24
    m johnson

    Finebaum brings out the worst common denominator fans from both sides. The show has little substance. He’s just learned to pit one idiot agaist another, and evidently create a so called “professional caller and analyst. Shane, put down the crack pipe and join us in the real world

  24. 25
    Ballplay indian

    SHANE ……..

    The whole Bama nation needs a P.R. overhaul.

    Yall are a laughing stock of the national media.

    Go to any national message board and see what the rest of the country thinks about THE MIGHTY TIDE.

    Remember at the end of 04 season when Tubby was claiming ESPN preferential treatment? You and Finebaum about stroked out.

    Then When the 4 million dollar man came to T-town after he said he wouldnt leave Miami and ESPN was on yall like stink on crap, All of the sudden its different, cause WERE BAMMA DAMMITT!!!!! Yall cant talk about us that way!!!!!

    Your fanbase is a joke to anybody not Bama, anywere in the country.

    Shane you ARE the spokesman for all things Bama. Why? because you are a typical representation of what a Bama FAN is.

  25. 26
    rednecktider

    Why in the hell are all your articles about Auburn?? For gods sake asshole.. just because Auburn beats the hell out of you everyone year.. can’t you write something about Bama? Oh yeah.. I guess there is nothing to write since you suck so damn bad. Here is the title of your next blog:: “Why We the Crimson Nation suck so bad”

  26. 28
    rednecktider

    Finebaum is an idoit and the fact that he has the crapstone report link on his website proves it. Finebaum and Shane go hand in hand.. I come here to laugh at both of them… they are both complete idoits.

  27. 29
    freaking genius

    keep up the good work shane… we’re all just jealous because we have to work for a living at silly office jobs and building things and such… after all, there are only a couple of elite positions available for “professional caller and analyst” and those positions are securly held by you and Jim. The pride of Tuscaloosa.

    you’re a brilliant man, objective and well-spoken. You are a shining light for the bama nation. Now you just keep carrying that torch so that the rest of the country can see the crimson empire and all its glory.

    St. Nick, Shane “the iceman” and Jim… proud representatives of the crimson and white!! keep up the good work, men!

  28. 30
    rednecktider

    tmc 1 and berman: Did either of you graduate from the University of Alabama? Just curious because most of the bama fans never stepped foot in a classroom there. I am reminded of what Finebaum said the first year Saban was coaching Alabama at the media days in Birmingham. There was a swirl of media and fans all over him. Fans from everywhere. Finebaum said that Tuberville could walk through the hotel and no one noticed him. Finebaum wondered outloud why all the fuss over Saban and all the Alabama fans that were around him, yet Tuberville had no one around him. The answer was simple: It was Thursday mid day and all Auburn fans/graduates were working. Typical.

  29. 32
    Shanes Boyfriend

    Shane…..go get Stabler and you boy’s knock back a few and talk about the good ole day’s at Bama…..just don’t let him drive! Your articles about Auburn continue to show your total consumption with the program that DOMINATES your crimson criminals.

  30. 33
    SHANE'S PAIN

    Hey Shane, looks like there might be an opening for a “crimson” color man on the Alabama Network. Apparently Auburn’s domination of the Tide over the past decade plus has driven the proud Bama Alumni, Kenny the Snake Stabler, to drinking and driving. Oh I’m sorry, he must have learned that from the Bear. I’ve heard how good the Bear was at teaching young men life long lessons. It sure worked with Stabler. Perhaps you could take over that role with the University and then Stabler could take your position at the ice factory. He’s got that degree from Bama you know. Or does he? Or since he is (or was) a professional talker, he could get the position “as a professional caller and analyst” on the PFRN. Oh, just a thought, should the Snake get another DUI, we Aubies will be able to break out the “Fear The Thumb” slogan all over again. That would be 5 DUI’s right? What a guy! I guess we should all be happy that the Snake (and now I understand the nickname) hasn’t killed anyone with his ignorance. I’m sure he has a great excuse though. He was probably put on “probation” after first or second DUI and you know what probation can do to an old, once proud, once respected institution or person! It can allow reality challenged people like you and Stabler to deny that there are any problems, there have never been any problems and there will never be any problems. What a freakin’ shame! I just noticed the uncanny similarity between Stable and Nick Nolte. Did Nolte play for the Bear? Or just portray him in another bad movie?

    ITS GREAT TO BE AN AUBURN TIGER!

  31. 34
    Ballplay indian

    WE shall all see soon what kind of “jouralist” Shane is. This Thursday or Friday he will post another column about some goofy Auburn B.S. when there are real stories to be written. If Shane writes one thing about Stabler my eyes will pop out of my head. That is a real news story boy. Not some stupid “Six guns and out of bullets crap” Captsone report, you lose all credibility by letting this graduate of “The Jerry Springer School O Jouralism” post on your website. But again he is a typical represintative of the BAMMER NATION.

  32. 35
    Warbird

    Shane for Brains, be careful what you ask for. I can assure you, you DON’T want me on PFRN. I know too much about you and your past. But, of course, you don’t need any help with killing your cred, just keep writing.

    BTW, if you want to do some REAL investigative reporting, why don’t you call up your buddy Mike Slive at the SEC office and find out how many SEC teams have made formal complaints about Nicky Baby and his recruiting. Here’s a clue, after this year’s Iron Bowl, how many fingers will Tubby be holding up? See if you can also ask him why he’s sitting on the complaints. Can you say “looking down the barrel of a gun”. Check it out “Mike Wallace” from Center Point.

    Then again, maybe I should call in to PFRN to set the record straight about Shane for Brains on so many fronts. Maybe I will…

  33. 36
    m johnson

    question: if you placed a snickers bar and a bottle of old crow at midfield of tubberville/denny stadium, could eli beat out snake in a 50 yard dash?

  34. 37
    OldTraffordman

    Who needs Auburn fans calling Finebaum to point out that Alabama is a 2nd class football program and Auburn rules the roost?

    Phil Steele came out this week and it clearly puts delusional Bamers in their place.

    Here are some nuggets:

    1. Alabama has had only 2 back to back winning seasons since 1996.
    2. Auburn has either won outright or tied for the SEC West 5 out of the last 8 years.
    3. John Parker Wilson has the highest number of interceptions among returning starting SEC quarterbacks and is working with his 3rd different OC in 4 years.
    4. Alabama has not scored a TD in the first quarter of the Iron Bowl in the last 11 matchups.

    Who needs callers when you have facts?

    Just for Shane who clearly is the archetype delusional Alabama fan who gets by denying things like facts, here are the top 10 things delusional Alabama fans try to talk about instead of acknowledging reality:

    10. Claim to have a better coach by taking credit for 2007 LSU National Championship.
    9. Blame years of ineptitude on the field on the NCAA, Phil Fulmer, Mike Shula, el nino, Mike Price, Mike Bubose, communists, Dennis Franchoine leaving, Joe Kines staying, and title ix.
    8. Claiming that 92,000 people showing up for a spring scimmage shows that Bama is back and ready to win a national championship.
    7. Claim to have a better coach because he can recruit as well as anyone (see Ray Goff).
    6. Attempt the Gene McCarthy distraction tactic of telling a whopper lie such as “Alabama will definitley go into Baton Rouge and kill LSU” or “Georgia doesn’t have a chance in Athens when the Tide comes to town.
    5. Emphasizing tradition, claiming that their team will “rely on their tradition” or some other nonsense to win games that does not in any way shape or form translate to making plays in a fooball game (see South Florida, Boise State, and Wake Forest for tradtionless teams that somehow find a way to win).
    4. Claim to have a better game day coach despite the fact that there are 6 current SEC coaches with better winning percentages and only besting 4 of the 12 current SEC coaches head to head.
    3. Go into hysterics whenever the Auburn coach “slights” Alabama such as holding up 7 fingers on a military visit or when he allows his coaches to speak to the media it is contrasted with the Alabama coaches media policy.
    2. Note that the Iron Bowl overall record is in Alabama’s favor (despite the fact that since the move out of Birmingham the record has favored Auburn).
    1. Take emphasis off of those pesky AP, USA Today, and BCS Polls and put the emhpasis on what really matters: the recruiting rankings.

  35. 38
    Warbird

    Oldtraffordman, excellent post. But I must correct at least Item #9 above…they also blame La Nina and Global Warming!

    Tradition never won a game. It always comes down to players making plays and coaches making calls. But not with Bammers. Tradition trumps all! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Fear the Toes!

  36. 39
    FinebaumJunkie

    There once was a man called snake…who in a breathalyzer did not take….he fell asleep on the horn….and called Shane Corn,,,,and blamed Tuberville for the China earthquake.

  37. 40
    tmc1

    Damnit Shane. The aubsurd aubsessed auboriginees cant leave your posts alone. I dont even know why they are trying to respond, they all sound like a bunch of punch drunk jugheads at an inbred barndance. Cant they stop the locals from drinking radiator moonshine in Lee County?

  38. 41
    reneckrolltider

    tmc1- We have to laugh at this insane crap that you think is journalism. We say the same thing about you on the Auburn boards. You talk about Aubies being on Bammer boards and you stay on the Auburn blog sites.

  39. 42
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    All yall barners out there better recognize!!!!!!!!!!! Shane is to journalism what Albert Einstien is to physics. Shane , I know these poeple dont appriciate you. But us Bammers know that without you (our brave and fearless leader) we would not be able to get the word out that Auburn sux and that Bama dont suck. All I got to say to yall barner is GOT 12!!!!!!!!! GOT RECRUITS !!!!!!!!!!!! GOT SABAN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW TTTTTTTTIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEE RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  40. 43
    Sabans Bitch

    Bama is back. We got Saban and you don’t. Bama is going to kick ass this year. Why wouldn’t we? We have the best recruiting class in the nation. We have the best offensive line and running backs in the nation. Basically we are the best at every position. Shane.. keep it coming. You are doing a great job.

  41. 44
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    SABANS BITCH………. I agree with you man WE KEEK ASSS. Bama will always have one thing that Aaburn aint got. TURDISHUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Member that barners. GOT 12!!!!!!!!!!

    ROLLLLLLLLLLL
    TIIIIIIIIIIDE
    ROLLLLLLLLLLL

    BY THE WAY THE STATE TROOPER THAT PULLED OVER SNAKE WAS A DAMN AUBURN FAN.

  42. 45
    Sabans Bitch

    of course he was a damn auburn fan. Why in the hell would he take snake down to lockup if he wasn’t a barner.. Snake is innocent. Robertsdale police are bias. Saban is the man. We are back baby

  43. 46
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    AWBARN FANS………..

    I hope that yall enjoyed the ride WHILE WE WERE AT OUR LOWEST POINT IN HISTORY. The NCAA

  44. 47
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    oops Idropped my crack pipe.

    As I was saying the evil NCAA tried to keep mighty Bamma down. But now the sun is bout to rise on a new chapter of KICKASS !!!!!!!!!!! NCAA cant keep Bamma down. Yall barners are skeered cause yall know whats a comin. Playtime is officially over boys. Its time for the clouds to part and ol bahr to beem down uponst the gridiron at Tuscaloosa and the reast of the SEC DAMMITT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Just ramember , Sabans cruiits are gonna rip you a new one this year.

    FEAR THE NICKTATER OR BECOME ASSIMALATED.

  45. 48
    toocomical

    Wow….CRIMSON CRACKPIPE!!! I hope for your sake and the sake of all the other bammers out there that your lack of spelling and grammar is on purpose. This is tooooooooooo FUNNY!!!! LOVE YA’LL!!!

  46. 49
    FinebaumJunkie

    I know what my tradition is for my family.We cook up a good hot pot of chili,gather around the tube,and wait patiently as Tommy Tubervilles seventh finger goes erect like Ron Jeremy.

  47. 51
    OldTraffordman

    Turdishun? Well I went to the ultimate source (at least for all folks who would put the word crackpipe in their message board handle) to look up the definition of the word turdishun. Even in the Urban Dictionary it is not present. Should be right between turdis and Turdistan.

    Regarding the 12 rings I only have one response. So what? Which one of those rings will score Alabama a touchdown in Athens this year when my beloved Bulldogs make it 4 in a row over the most loved 2nd best football program in the state of Alabama? How many TD passes will Ken Stabler throw in Baton Rouge? Which one of those 73,000 people who showed up for a free scrimmage on a Saturday this spring will make a tackle against Mississippi state?

    Regarding Saban’s recruits. Which one of those recruits will be under center this fall? Which one of those recruits is in the 2-deep at running back? Which one of those recruits gave Shane and all the delusional Alabama fans (delusional is really redundant here I should abandon using that adjective in this context) hope and inspiration during the spring scrimmage?

    Claming that a group of freshmen who have not played a single down of college football will win games is a pretty idotic claim.

    Also, there have been other programs on probation with less alleged “tradition” that somehow found a way to have a string of decent seasons. Last time I checked, Kentucky was below Alabama on the college football food chain yet they were 8-5 (16-10 total) the last 2 years where Alabama was 13-13. Kentucky was hammered in probation (remember Tony Franklin?) yet somehow they found a way to win. The probation is over and has been so get over it. Stop using it as an excuse for having a 2nd rate football program.

    Finally, I’d like to address these next sentences to Crackpipe. For the sake of well meaning people from the great state of Georgia (by way of UK) like myself, please go to the Urban Dictionary and add an entry for Turdishun so we can attempt to try to understand your version of English.

    Go Dawgs!
    M-U-F-C: There is only one United!

  48. 52
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    OLDTRAFFORDMAN…….DONT BE HATIN ON BAMMA !!!!!!! Look , I understand that you are jelous of the Tide. Who wouldnt be. We have 12 National championships boy. How amany does UGAY have? 2 or 3? Yall and got no Turdishun so SHUT UP !!!!!!!!!!!! You arent even worthy to say the word BAMA. As far as somebdy from GORGEE coming over here to try to give me an english lesson, PULEEESEE !!!!!!! Save that crap for the toothless inbred hicks that we all know as JAWJANS !!!! Old traffordman have you ever been to Esom Hills JAWJA ? Heck you prolly live there dont you ? Yall got lucky against us last year , but just like the rest of the SEC we know your SKEERED. You know that Bama and SAban are gonna beat you like the red headed dog barking spastics that you are? Can you understand that Bammas stay of execution is over and we ARE GONNA KICK JAWJEES MONKEY ASSES NEXT TIME WE PLAY!!!!!

  49. 54
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    OH YEAH…. Old Traffordman. Wernt you Warren Beattys stunt double in DELIVERANCE? After all that epic film was shot in Georgia. The land were the DAWGS rule and the sheep are nervous.

    RRROOOOLLL TTTTIDDDDDDDEE RRRROOOLLLLL!!!!!!!!!

  50. 55
    SHANE'S PAIN

    Old Trafford man,

    Great post! Aren’t you glad that Georgia Tech, Florida and Auburn, as huge rivals of Georgia at least have a bit of class? I, as a life long Auburn supporter am proud to say I appreciate Georgia and feel they will be in the Conference Championship game this season and most likely against Auburn. I’m certain it won’t be Alabama, they’ll be lucky to break even again this year.

    It’s great to be an Auburn Tiger! Go Georgia, go Florida, Go Vols, Go Vandy, Go Rebels, Go Cocks (of South Carolina not Shane and Crimson Crackpipe), Go Mississippi State, Go Hogs, Go Kentucky, Go LSU and finally…Bama sux!

  51. 56
    CRIMSON CRACKPIPE

    SHANES PAIN ……

    YOU HAVE MESSED WITH THE BULL, NOW YOU WILL GET THE HORNS

    JAWJA= NO TURDISHUN

    AWBURN= NO TURDISHUN

    BAMA= THE EPITOME OF TURDISHUN

    BEAR= WERNT NUTTIN BUT A WINNER

    TUBBS= NO CLASS FINGER RAISER

    T-TOWN=EPICENTER OF CULTURE

    AWBURN= EPICENTER OF COW HOCKEY

    YALL ALL KNOW THAT YOU ARE JEALOUS OF BAMMA SO JUST ACCEPT IT AND SHUT YOUR PIE HOLES AND GO BEAT YOUR WIFE/SISTER/COUSIN…

  52. 57
    FinebaumJunkie

    HAHAHA, that was pretty damn funny Crackpipe.It would have been gutbusting if you had gotten it right. It was Ned Beatty.

  53. 58
    jerryl hyche

    You make a laughing stock of the entire Bama Nation. It is true that a new spokesman is needed on the PFRN. Anyone to replace you and the putrid crap coming out of your sewer mouth. You are truly a d**khead

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